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Help me please!!!

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 7:14 am
by JadeDragoness
Several months ago i was upstairs in the bathroom gathering dirty clothes, my son got out the front door and ran into the parking lot to my apartments. I ran down stairs as soon as I heard the door open and caught him and brought him back inside. A neighbor saw him get out and called CPS on me. They came by and asked what happened and left it at that.

Last Thursday my daughter shut off my alarm when she came into my room to get socks and finish getting ready for school. She said the alarm had just started when she walked into the room. I am always up at 6 am and my son usually doesn't wake until 8 or 9. She must have accidentally woke him while she was getting ready. So, i didn't get a chance for the alarm to wake me and she forgot to replace the gate back on the top of the stairs. Plus she left the door unlocked. Not that that matters because he can unlock the door. I have now installed deadbolts that use a key inside and outside (no knob for him to flip or unlock). What do you think my chances of getting my son back are? If you were the judge what would you do?

My son woke up earlier than usual and took his tricycle out and rode it down the street. The very thought that he was able to do that terrifies me and i can't stop thinking of what could have happened. Now they have my son and I am fighting not to have a complete breakdown. Please give me any advice you have or be the judge and tell me what you think. I need to have some idea of my chances of getting my son back. Please

Please help me. i love my son more than life. i am not abusive nor do i neglect my children.

Re: Help me please!!!

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 9:33 am
by family_man
Your story is frightening to me because it could happen to any family. In fact, I've had kids sneak out the door several times. No actual harm came to them, but it could have. I could have been reported to CPS but wasn't. Personally, I think it's totally unreasonable for CPS to have taken your kids into custody for such commonplace incidents. If they do this, then no family is safe from them. At most, CPS should have had you sign a safety plan in which you promised to improve the lock system, but kept the children with you. However, I'm not the judge. I'm not even sure you'll be able to present your side of the story. If you do, present pictures to the judge of the new locks you've installed, and describe how they will prevent this from happening again. Put these statements in writing and ask that they be placed in the record.

Life involves risk. It is not possible to live without any kind of dangers. If CPS can break families apart only because of a perceived risk, then no family is safe. Putting keyed deadbolts on all the doors also introduces risk. What if there's a fire and you can't find your keys?

Re: Help me please!!!

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 10:26 am
by Daruma
family_man wrote:Putting keyed deadbolts on all the doors also introduces risk. What if there's a fire and you can't find your keys?

Deadbolts which require a key to unlock them from the inside have been outlawed in many areas, for exactly that reason.

JadeDragoness, have you also considered getting a door alarm of some sort?

JadeDragoness's story isn't unique. There was a family in a neighboring county in my state who went through something similar. If I recall correctly, the mom got her kids back before too much time passed, but the story made the local papers.

family_man wrote:present pictures to the judge of the new locks you've installed, and describe how they will prevent this from happening again. Put these statements in writing and ask that they be placed in the record

Agreed.

Re: Help me please!!!

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2011 2:24 am
by Dboo2
The judge will most likley impose a safety plan for a minum of 12 months, with no further incidents you will be clear. Keep calm keep a diary and have your daughter write a statment on your behalf, door alarms are not a bad idea, I got mine on amazon.com. Good luck.