Non-Custodial Parent Question

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Ookull
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Sep 23, 2011 7:00 am

Non-Custodial Parent Question

Postby Ookull » Fri Sep 23, 2011 7:22 am

Is it just me, or can nothing much be done when there is an issue of abuse at the hands of a non-custodial parent?

What, in general, does CPS/DFCS do when an allegation is made against a non-custodial parent?

My experience has been that CPS can only do a welfare check on the children while with the NCP and that they cannot do a caseplan with a NCP - only with the Custodial Parent. What other resources are available for custodial parents who have reason to believe a NCP is abusing a child during a visitation period?

treytrey1
Posts: 279
Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2010 12:32 pm
Location: Tennessee

Re: Non-Custodial Parent Question

Postby treytrey1 » Fri Sep 23, 2011 10:45 am

You may need to hire a lawyer, but if you think you have enough proof that the NCP is abusing the child while visiting,
you can ask the court to give supervised visits to them. This will insure the safety of the child.

CPSptsd
Posts: 62
Joined: Wed May 18, 2011 7:31 pm

Re: Non-Custodial Parent Question

Postby CPSptsd » Wed Sep 28, 2011 6:23 am

I would think that the best course of action would be to petition the court for a custody modification. In addition, document everything the child has said (if there is anything said) and I would think frequent medical visits would be in order.

I am hesitant to recommend involving CPS, and I know that if there is an outcry or suspicion of abuse then any doctors or mental health people consulted will report it.

I have often wondered if it might be better, depending on the situation, to report things to the police directly? I don't really know though. It is all risky. CPS is not supposed to (I don't think, but check the regs for your state) be writing up case plans with NCPs, but they don't really follow their own rules.

In our case, CPS had the child's non-custodial father agree to a voluntary kinship placement, had the entire case plan with HIM and pretty much acted like the custodial parent (my spouse) didn't exist! There weren't "supposed" to do any of this but that doesn't really matter.
"You know, the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views. Which can be uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that need altering." -- The Doctor

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brookeycookie
Posts: 514
Joined: Wed May 04, 2011 5:53 pm

Re: Non-Custodial Parent Question

Postby brookeycookie » Sat Oct 01, 2011 4:03 pm

I am a custodial parent (well, I was, before CPS kidnapped my daughter) , and the noncustodial parent sexually molested her. (According to her, her behavior, her STD, and her testimony ).

CPS has a service plan for me, but not the NCP. They have a case plan and services for me, but not the NCP. Their reason to me, was he has no children in his home. My next question was, aren't plans for the parent who did something wrong or have allegations against them? Their answer to me was, I have children in my home, one of my children has a CPS case on them, therefore I have to have a plan. Even if I wasn't accused. ....

My take on that is this.....let's say my ex is innocent. Should he not have the same services as I? I mean, if he's innocent he will eventually have our daughter back in his home and shouldn't he be held to same risk management as I? Let's say he's guilty. Should he not have a service plan? I mean, geesh, he molested a child. Id say that's an issue that's needs services.

Its their way to be able to entrap either parent they want. If they can't find anything on one, they halve a case on the other.

In my situation, no one has ever complained about me. I didn't know what CPS was before this. They were called because the NCP was accused of molesting her. I believe it happened. Regardless if it did or didn't, I am being held accountable for his alleged actions. More so, im being held to far worse standards than he is, while they figure out if he's guilty or not. Their reason? I have other children in my home and he doesn't.

I even was denied an order of protection against him, because a prior court ruled paternity?! So....if you go go to court years ago and determine paternity and support/visitation and such, that means ten years later if the guy beats and rapes your child, too bad? The judge said he cannot give a protection order keeping a father away from his daughter, even if he raped her at 3 yrs old, because a prior court with higher power said 2 years ago that he had rights to see her. Look, when we split I too wanted him to see her. Something about laying your hard penis on my toddler changes my opinion of a person. Simple. The court system has flaws, CPS is one giant flaw, and as honest as the judge was being, he can only go by what his appointed agencies tell him. He can't run around investigating everyone himself. And he can't go against laws even if they seem to not fit the situation. Craziness at the expense of our babies. Puke.

CPSptsd
Posts: 62
Joined: Wed May 18, 2011 7:31 pm

Re: Non-Custodial Parent Question

Postby CPSptsd » Mon Oct 03, 2011 1:52 pm

brookeycookie wrote:I am a custodial parent (well, I was, before CPS kidnapped my daughter) , and the noncustodial parent sexually molested her. (According to her, her behavior, her STD, and her testimony ).

CPS has a service plan for me, but not the NCP. They have a case plan and services for me, but not the NCP. Their reason to me, was he has no children in his home. My next question was, aren't plans for the parent who did something wrong or have allegations against them? Their answer to me was, I have children in my home, one of my children has a CPS case on them, therefore I have to have a plan. Even if I wasn't accused. ....

My take on that is this.....let's say my ex is innocent. Should he not have the same services as I? I mean, if he's innocent he will eventually have our daughter back in his home and shouldn't he be held to same risk management as I? Let's say he's guilty. Should he not have a service plan? I mean, geesh, he molested a child. Id say that's an issue that's needs services.

Its their way to be able to entrap either parent they want. If they can't find anything on one, they halve a case on the other.

In my situation, no one has ever complained about me. I didn't know what CPS was before this. They were called because the NCP was accused of molesting her. I believe it happened. Regardless if it did or didn't, I am being held accountable for his alleged actions. More so, im being held to far worse standards than he is, while they figure out if he's guilty or not. Their reason? I have other children in my home and he doesn't.

I even was denied an order of protection against him, because a prior court ruled paternity?! So....if you go go to court years ago and determine paternity and support/visitation and such, that means ten years later if the guy beats and rapes your child, too bad? The judge said he cannot give a protection order keeping a father away from his daughter, even if he raped her at 3 yrs old, because a prior court with higher power said 2 years ago that he had rights to see her. Look, when we split I too wanted him to see her. Something about laying your hard penis on my toddler changes my opinion of a person. Simple. The court system has flaws, CPS is one giant flaw, and as honest as the judge was being, he can only go by what his appointed agencies tell him. He can't run around investigating everyone himself. And he can't go against laws even if they seem to not fit the situation. Craziness at the expense of our babies. Puke.


OMG that is insane. I am so disgusted and so sorry for you and your daughter.

In a case involving a friend and her 10 year old daughter, she WAS able to get a protective order keeping the sexually abusive father away. We are in Texas. He had visitation rights for the child's entire life. Maybe it depends on what state?

It is sickening.
"You know, the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views. Which can be uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that need altering." -- The Doctor


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