Military Career on the line
Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2012 9:19 am
Hi my name is Kintara but everyone calls me Tori. I recently returned from Afghanistan in September because my son was hurt while I was gone. I had only been gone 6 days and I had to come home on Emergency leave. While I was gone I left my son in the care of my younger sister and they were going to leave that weekend to go back home to be closer to family. I was given the opportunity to call home that night and she asked me if it was okay for my son to go visit his dad before they left. I told her no and she convinced me to allow him to go, so I told her it was okay but he needed to be home the next day. When I was able to call home again my son hadn't been returned. That's when I received the Red Cross message and I was on the plane back home.
While my son was with his dad he was returned with bruises on his head, hair pulled from his head, burns in his mouth and a broken femur. At the time my son was only 7 months old.
Well, it gets complicated here, they did the bone scan on my son and found out he had healing fractures to his ribs and also a spiral fracture to his right tibia. During the time of these fractures he was in my care, his dads care, and the daycare providers care(which was an in home daycare).
I didn't notice these fractures because my son showed no signs of bruising, he wasn't cranky, and when I played with him he didn't show any signs. Each doctors appointment I've ever taken my son to he hasn't had any problems. If I had known these things, I would have taken him to the doctor. I am a first time mom so anytime something didn't seem right I have taken my son to the doctor. So if I had known he had been hurt I would have taken him to the doctor.
His dad and I were never together. It was a fling that lasted one night and then it ended. He has never been there for my son until now that CPS in involved. He has tried to give up his rights to my son and said that he didn't want anything to do with him and he didn't feel anything for him.
When CPS got involved and the heat was on him and once he found out he had previous injuries he decided he wasn't going down alone. He told the caseworker when he would come to my house to pick my son up he would have bruises on his legs and arms so he thought I was mistreating him. But this has never been reported.
The doctor's report stated that the injuries happened at least 3 to 4 weeks from the time my son had been hospitalized. Around this time is when my son had started back visiting his dad. That weekend he went to see him and he returned with scratches to his face, but they all had explanations. He had a bad rash in his head which also had an explanation. My son also went to live with him for a week and he was under the care of his mother and he was also returned with scratches but they all had exaplanations. It never led me to any reason to believe he had been abused while under the care of his dad.
CPS bashed me because I had never been to his house and looked around his house to make sure it was safe for my son. They also bashed me for allowing my son to continue to go over to his house.
I am a single mother in the military with little to no help. This man has raised three children before my son and he is also a coach of a little kids track team. You always hear nice things about him and I trusted this man with my child. I never in a million years thought anything like this would ever happen. He is much older than I and he has more experience with children.
However, the situation gets worse. I didn't know the man had previous CPS cases on him. I've never had to deal with CPS and never been in any trouble with them. He has been previous validated for abuse and neglect and he also had two assualt charges from the past.
CPS doesn't know what happen, I don't know what happened and his father says he doesn't know what happened. But something happened, but no one is coming forward. Him and his family has been lying and trying to use every excuse in the book to cover up what has happened to my son.
He has two children that live in the house with him, a daughter who is about 12 and a 9 year old son who is autistic. I have saw this child get mad once when something doesn't go his way. He throws a tantrum and he starts throwing things.
I spoke with a mutual friend of ours who has been around the son more than I have and he told me straight up that he thinks the little boy did it because he has seen him at his angry point.
Autisic children need a lot of attention so I am thinking it was done out of jealousy. That is his child and he loves him more than anything so he is going to protect him from anything that could go wrong.
The child told the case worker that nothing bad happened to my son while he was at their house that weekend and it was just an accident. So what happened? His sister told the caseworker that she was at her mother's for the weekend. Anytime they have a weekend visit they go together, so why was the son with his father and the daughter with her mother? Doesn't make sense to me.
My son's dad said his first reaction was that his son had jumped off the bed onto my son's leg. Others believe this to be true because it is something that he would do. While having a conversation with his dad he said he wished it was so easy to just say his son jumped onto my sons leg and then we wouldnt be going through all of this.
His father and mother lives in the house with him but his father wasn't interviewed by the caseworker but his mother was. She told them that she wasn't his primary caregiver, which she wasn't. She told them that she had only watched my son for a couple of hours and didn't mention the fact that she had watched him the whole week he was staying with them.
My career is on the line. He has been forced to retire, that's what he's telling me i can't believe him because he lies so much. My career has just begun. CPS called me to sign my Family Plan, or whatever it is called and their disposition was ruled out for me. The next day in court, before we walked in they changed their disposition to "Reason To Believe" but couldn't provide an explanation as to what had changed, not even 24 hours.
The military agrees with what CPS says and I have been found guilty until I can prove I am innocent. This information stays on my records for 25 years and it will affect me greatly in my career.
I have 30 days to appeal their decision and I am working on that. The criminal investigation is in the DA's office and I don't know what the ruling is. If I am not being charged the military may consider reversing their decision. But it would have to be new information.
However, thank God my son is back home with me. He was returned back to me at the first placement hearing that was held. They said they had never saw that before. So the judge didn't think my son was in any danger because he returned him back home to me.
If anyone can give me any advice on what to do or what I should do, please feel free to let me know so that I can act on it as soon as possible. Thanks for taking the time to read this post. God bless.
While my son was with his dad he was returned with bruises on his head, hair pulled from his head, burns in his mouth and a broken femur. At the time my son was only 7 months old.
Well, it gets complicated here, they did the bone scan on my son and found out he had healing fractures to his ribs and also a spiral fracture to his right tibia. During the time of these fractures he was in my care, his dads care, and the daycare providers care(which was an in home daycare).
I didn't notice these fractures because my son showed no signs of bruising, he wasn't cranky, and when I played with him he didn't show any signs. Each doctors appointment I've ever taken my son to he hasn't had any problems. If I had known these things, I would have taken him to the doctor. I am a first time mom so anytime something didn't seem right I have taken my son to the doctor. So if I had known he had been hurt I would have taken him to the doctor.
His dad and I were never together. It was a fling that lasted one night and then it ended. He has never been there for my son until now that CPS in involved. He has tried to give up his rights to my son and said that he didn't want anything to do with him and he didn't feel anything for him.
When CPS got involved and the heat was on him and once he found out he had previous injuries he decided he wasn't going down alone. He told the caseworker when he would come to my house to pick my son up he would have bruises on his legs and arms so he thought I was mistreating him. But this has never been reported.
The doctor's report stated that the injuries happened at least 3 to 4 weeks from the time my son had been hospitalized. Around this time is when my son had started back visiting his dad. That weekend he went to see him and he returned with scratches to his face, but they all had explanations. He had a bad rash in his head which also had an explanation. My son also went to live with him for a week and he was under the care of his mother and he was also returned with scratches but they all had exaplanations. It never led me to any reason to believe he had been abused while under the care of his dad.
CPS bashed me because I had never been to his house and looked around his house to make sure it was safe for my son. They also bashed me for allowing my son to continue to go over to his house.
I am a single mother in the military with little to no help. This man has raised three children before my son and he is also a coach of a little kids track team. You always hear nice things about him and I trusted this man with my child. I never in a million years thought anything like this would ever happen. He is much older than I and he has more experience with children.
However, the situation gets worse. I didn't know the man had previous CPS cases on him. I've never had to deal with CPS and never been in any trouble with them. He has been previous validated for abuse and neglect and he also had two assualt charges from the past.
CPS doesn't know what happen, I don't know what happened and his father says he doesn't know what happened. But something happened, but no one is coming forward. Him and his family has been lying and trying to use every excuse in the book to cover up what has happened to my son.
He has two children that live in the house with him, a daughter who is about 12 and a 9 year old son who is autistic. I have saw this child get mad once when something doesn't go his way. He throws a tantrum and he starts throwing things.
I spoke with a mutual friend of ours who has been around the son more than I have and he told me straight up that he thinks the little boy did it because he has seen him at his angry point.
Autisic children need a lot of attention so I am thinking it was done out of jealousy. That is his child and he loves him more than anything so he is going to protect him from anything that could go wrong.
The child told the case worker that nothing bad happened to my son while he was at their house that weekend and it was just an accident. So what happened? His sister told the caseworker that she was at her mother's for the weekend. Anytime they have a weekend visit they go together, so why was the son with his father and the daughter with her mother? Doesn't make sense to me.
My son's dad said his first reaction was that his son had jumped off the bed onto my son's leg. Others believe this to be true because it is something that he would do. While having a conversation with his dad he said he wished it was so easy to just say his son jumped onto my sons leg and then we wouldnt be going through all of this.
His father and mother lives in the house with him but his father wasn't interviewed by the caseworker but his mother was. She told them that she wasn't his primary caregiver, which she wasn't. She told them that she had only watched my son for a couple of hours and didn't mention the fact that she had watched him the whole week he was staying with them.
My career is on the line. He has been forced to retire, that's what he's telling me i can't believe him because he lies so much. My career has just begun. CPS called me to sign my Family Plan, or whatever it is called and their disposition was ruled out for me. The next day in court, before we walked in they changed their disposition to "Reason To Believe" but couldn't provide an explanation as to what had changed, not even 24 hours.
The military agrees with what CPS says and I have been found guilty until I can prove I am innocent. This information stays on my records for 25 years and it will affect me greatly in my career.
I have 30 days to appeal their decision and I am working on that. The criminal investigation is in the DA's office and I don't know what the ruling is. If I am not being charged the military may consider reversing their decision. But it would have to be new information.
However, thank God my son is back home with me. He was returned back to me at the first placement hearing that was held. They said they had never saw that before. So the judge didn't think my son was in any danger because he returned him back home to me.
If anyone can give me any advice on what to do or what I should do, please feel free to let me know so that I can act on it as soon as possible. Thanks for taking the time to read this post. God bless.