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Posted: Sat Oct 25, 2014 2:39 am
by Ace
On Wednesday, October 29th, 2014, the state plans to terminate my parental rights. I AM GOING OUT OF MY MIND!!! I LOVE MY SWEET BABIES SO MUCH THAT I CANNOT IMAGINE LIVING PAST THAT DATE! My lawyer (at least, that's what she calls herself) won't return my calls, won't subpoena ANYONE or ANYTHING for me, and won't file a JV-180 (whatever that is). I am not stupid: I have three college degrees, including an SMBA and a Marketing degree. It's just that I have been so sick, and so depressed, and struggling with a severe case of PTSD, that I am PARALYZED!!! I cannot even get out of bed a lot of times, and I wake up crying hysterically all the time. My blood pressure is off the charts since this year started, and I am on FOUR strong blood pressure meds already!

I am supposed to be the man of the family, but last year I lost my mom, then my sweet babies were taken, then my dad passed on this year, then two months later, TEN DAYS BEFORE OUR COURT DATE WHERE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GET OUR BABIES BACK, my wife left me. After that, the court postponed the hearing for one more month, and when we went in, the judge now stated that we were unfit EVER to be parents, that we would NEVER change, etc., and that the court was now actively seeking adoption! I have been sober for over TWENTY YEARS! (and my wife was sober while we were together), we neither smoked nor did drugs or took ANYTHING that wasn't doctor prescribed. We fed them incredibly healthy food. We got ALL of their shots and checkups, and took them to the emergency room or their doctor if they EVER had a fever, or a sore throat or an earache, etc. Even CPS, that lied and said that they "rescued" the babies from a "FILTHY" house (it was SPOTLESS, and the CPS lady on the scene said EXACTLY the time!), stated in their report that the babies' skins were "PRISTINE!" That's how clean we kept our sweet angels! WE LOVE OUR BABIES MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF! They were NEVER abused (except by a foster family who was strangling our son; you could see the scabs and bruises around his little neck!!!!!!!!!!) OH MY GOD!!! I can't type anymore now...

Okay, I'm back. IMMEDIATELY after that court hearing, I got a letter saying that, CPS "FOUND" a gay couple of men in San Diego who wanted to have a family. Well, now they do have one: MINE!!! And that's comprised of three beautiful, smart, sweet, precious, blond-haired, blue-eyed babies!!! MY SWEET BABIES!!!

I don't know what I'm doing and the depression is so bad that I don't sleep, I don't eat, I cry all day, I cry when I see other people's children, etc. Today, at 1:00 pm is my LAST visit with my babies, EVER! They are 6, 5 and 2. I don't know how I can say goodbye without dying! CPS wants me NEVER to show emotion when the babies are there, but how in God's Name can I say goodbye to my babies, supposedly FOREVER, and still keep breathing?

I didn't have running water because the landlord turned it off, and in Palm Desert (and other towns I found out), ONLY the OWNER may turn on the water! But THAT DAY, when they took my precious babies, I was moving into a house with EVERYTHING. They still took my children even after they verified that it was true. I was sick for so very long, but earlier this year my new doctor diagnosed me as having NO IMMUNE SYSTEM. I almost died a number of times last year, and before I was diagnosed this year I could not make all of the court ordered appointments BECAUSE I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL! When I tried to prove this with the hospital and doctor letters and records, the judge would not allow it into the record. I am receiving treatment now and I have the start of an immune system. I am getting healthier, or rather, I WAS getting healthier until I got so depressed that I couldn't eat, sleep, etc.

I called EVERY LAWYER THAT I COULD FIND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY, and ESPECIALLY the ones who were suggested to me as being able to help. I don't have any money, but in most cases that wouldn't help anyhow. Even the lawyers who supposedly do CPS cases for a LIVING wouldn't take my case. They all said a variation of the same thing: "We don't do CPS cases...but so-and-so might be able to help you..." Of course, "so-and-so" NEVER COULD HELP IN ANY WAY, except maybe to give me another "so-and-so" who MIGHT be able to help! I did find one CHRISTIAN law firm where a lawyer said, "We MIGHT help you to keep the babies from being adopted by a GAY couple, but we won't promise you ANYTHING, and you HAVE TO FIRE YOUR CURRENT LAWYER! I have to fire my worthless layer FIRST, then they MIGHT help me? How does that work? How am I supposed to have hope about that? And I don't have anything against gays, but I want my babies back! And all that they MIGHT do would to be to block THIS adoption for me, and then allow any other non-gay adoption to go through. HOW DOES THAT HELP ME IN ANY WAY???!!! That just helps to promote THEIR agenda! How can these EVIL people be allowed to do stuff like that to a grieving parent such as me???!!!

I HAVE to get my medical records into the court records. How do I do that? Do I have grounds for an appeal?

I LITERALLY CANNOT TYPE ANYMORE! I cannot see the screen, and won't be able to for a long while. I know this feeling... And it seriously doesn't help that this website, while I am POURING MY HEART OUT, keeps wanting me to "MEET PRETTY ASIAN WOMAN!" REALLY???!!! NOW???!!! On THIS website???!!! Seriously, check the attachment at the bottom!

Anyhow, I know that it isn't considered the smart thing to do, but here goes anyhow. My phone number is (760) 774-6714. SOMEONE, PLEASE HELP!!!

Seriously, check the attachment!
FightCPS ADS!.JPG (151.81 KiB) Viewed 1174 times


Posted: Tue Oct 28, 2014 8:57 pm
by LindaJM
Hi there,

First, you have my sympathy, but that's not enough to keep your children from this fate. I'm not a lawyer, only another parent who experienced CPS and discovered it was corrupt, and I then couldn't stop wanting to fight against it and try to support and help other parents in whatever way I could.

I don't have a lot of good suggestions for you. But.. for what it is worth, here are a few. First, did you create a "Declarations of Facts" for your TPR hearing? How about "Objections and Corrections"?? Both sample documents are linked to this page: ... n-library/

If you don't have time you might be able to ask for a continuance.

If your attorney isn't doing anything to help you, tell the judge you need a different attorney because yours is incompetent and not doing anything to defend your rights.

It breaks my heart when I don't hear from parents until the last minute. It is easier to prevail earlier in the case.

So sorry your wife left you during this ordeal... that only makes things worse for everyone. Very tragic.

About the Asian ladies ad... I never see that one. If I know what page it went to I could block it. The way this works is that Google tracks us to see what we're interested in and so they think you're interested in Asian women and they think I'm interested in... "Four Foot Farm Blueprint: The sneaky prepper trick to hoard massive amounts of food super cheap." Interesting as I haven't been to any prepper sites recently but I do own a page for selling prepper books... and though I haven't been to that page in a long time, I recently was at a page that links to it. Oh, maybe I watched a video by a well-known prepper recently so they thought I'd like to get a prepper ad. ???

Anyhow, sorry about the weird ads. I can only block them if I know the link to be blocked. Someone else complained recently that they saw an ad for foster parenting!! How I'd love to block that one... but I never get to see that either. They were probably researching foster parents so the ad came up for them.

Edited to add: there's a link to stop the Google tracking...
My legal disclosures page states: "Google: Google is now using something called a DoubleClick DART cookie. This tracks your interests by tracking what pages you visit on the internet. The intent is to display advertising that matches your interests. More information and opt-out here."


Posted: Tue Oct 28, 2014 9:40 pm
by Ace
Thanks for the information. I do plan to ask for a continuance, but I don't know if I can get it. As for my "lawyer," she is absolutely WORTHLESS. Both my wife and I, while we were still together, petitioned for new lawyers, as the ones that we had were completely useless. Neither one of them would subpoena a single document or witness from a huge list that we gave to each of them. They gave us separate lawyers for some reason, but they were obviously in league with each other, because they were in unbelievable lock-step on EVERY decision about our case, even though we NEVER saw them talk to each other.

In any case, the commissioner refused to allow us to get new attorneys, stating that he thought that our lawyers were both doing a fine job! What a complete load! It is obvious that they are all friends, as it is a very small cadre of people who do ALL of the cases. We see them all the time doing every case that comes through the court.

The CPS office out here is so corrupt that my wife's and my counselors both wrote to the court to protest the reports that they SUPPOSEDLY wrote for the court. In fact, the CPS lady completely ignored the actual reports that they wrote in favor of phone call interviews that the CPS worker did to both of our counselors. They both were so horribly misquoted and downright lied about, that when I showed my counselor the actual court transcript, she flipped! She said that NONE of the negative comments in the supposed report were hers. My wife's counselor agreed, so they both wrote letters to the court protesting this misinformation tactic.

Interestingly, and maybe too late, I found a web site, right after posting this message, that explains how to use the Americans with Disabilities Act to petition the court to rescind a TPR, due to the fact that they completely ignored my disabilities and illnesses, which they are NOT allowed to do! They MUST make reasonable accommodations for both my illnesses and my disabilities, ESPECIALLY since they are basing the TPR on my inability to complete the case plan THIS TIME. Once before, when I was not as ill, we had our babies taken for the first time. I worked SO HARD to get my babies back, and we did. Now, after that nightmare, I tried, and failed, to repeat my efforts from the first time, but I was just too ill. Yet neither the court nor CPS allowed me ANY accommodations when I was unable to complete the case plan, despite my best efforts. I have actual hospital records to prove how sick I was, and when. The court ignored all of these. I go to court in the morning, so I don't yet know what will happen when I offer it up to the court.

Wish me luck. I will just die if I lose my sweet babies. I need to have some kind of hope. A continuation would go a long way toward giving me that, so I am praying that I get one. I will let you know what happens. I don't have any time to complete the documents that you pointed out, but if I get a continuance, I would then have the time. Okay, off to bed.


Posted: Wed Oct 29, 2014 12:33 pm
by whosechildrenarethey
It would benefit other parents finding themselves in your shoes tremendously if you posted the link to the website you refer to regarding ADA issues.


Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 9:01 am
by Ace


Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 9:15 am
by Ace
Oh, and by the way, I lost all of my babies forever. Does anyone know how and where to file an appeal? The judge not only ignored me, but he wouldn't allow ANYTHING to be offered into evidence, just as he did in the past. Also, for the second time I fired my supposed "attorney," and for the second time the judge FORCED me to keep her! HOW CAN THIS HAPPEN???!!! If I think my attorney is not doing her job, why am I not allowed to fire her???????!!!!!!!! This makes NO sense to me on any level! What can I do? This MUST be grounds for appeal? My "attorney" hated me and I hated her, and she did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to help me! I even threatened her over the phone, which she told the judge, but he just ignored that. What can I do? Please advise!


Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 10:41 am
by Ace
The pain of losing my babies is worse than anything that I could ever have imagined. My brain is on fire, as it is being slashed by a million razor blades. I hurt all over and have no sweet little guys to hold and to comfort me. I don't know if I can do this. The pain is overwhelming in every way. All I can do is to sit here, paralyzed, and to cry. And the tears burn like acid. It is too much to take. And the last shred of hope to which I was clinging now seems gone forever. I feel as if I should be gone, too. What father cannot protect his family from the barbarians at the gate? I let them win, and now I have no one in this entire world to hold me here. My parents passed away recently. My wife left me TEN DAYS BEFORE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GET OUR BABIES BACK, EARLIER THIS YEAR. And I have been recovering from a major illness. Now I cannot see the point of all of the unimaginably hard struggles through therapy, parenting classes, working, overcoming my physical limitations, fighting, and calling, and searching for someone, anyone to help me...and what did I get? A DEATH SENTENCE! How would I live every day with this unbearable pain? I cannot eat, I cannot sleep, it is almost impossible to leave the house, and when I do people are afraid of me because, when I see any children, I often burst into tears. I scare myself. I don't know what I will do or of what I am capable. The only thing that I am sure of is that I cannot go on like this. I have to do something, and there is only one thing that I can think of that would end all of this pain and unbearable misery. I had my sweet babies later in life, and was so incredibly happy when we had them. And especially when we had my sweet boy. He is so exquisitely sensitive, and so incredibly smart, and now I won't get to teach him how to play catch, or to fish, etc. I also won't be able to play tea party with my sweet baby girls, the youngest of whom I DELIVERED into this world! OH GOD!!! This pain is just too much!!! I think that I'll go now. Maybe, if you're the praying type, you could say a prayer for my three, sweet, precious angels? Now that I'll never get to see them grow up, it doesn't make much sense to be around in this much pain, and with no hope. It is just too much to take...


Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2014 8:43 pm
by LindaJM
Hang on... prayer is the answer. By living through this you will become STRONGER and will be a FORCE to be reckoned with. You are a writer. You could do great good with the grief you've been given. It can transform you and your work in the future.

In the Bible it says that Jesus came to heal broken hearts. If you need comfort, find a good church and cling to it for help getting through this. I went through a broken heart situation last year and ... well, He helped me.

About the appeal... I heard recently that the lawyer is supposed to file for an appeal automatically. Please go sit in her office until you hear an appeal has been filed. Then you will need to find a lawyer to help you with that. I know some states will provide an appeals lawyer if you can't afford one for a case like this.

I think you have a good appeals case based on your disability situation, and incompetent attorney and even a judge who would not allow you to submit evidence.

Do not turn to drugs and alcohol. I am hoping there will be something much better in your future.


Posted: Fri Jun 24, 2016 4:03 am
by rthrw01
JV 180 file your self and it a request to change a court order

file a 388 petition with that.

I filed one I will send you my petition you get in contact with me.

You need get your court case file


Posted: Sat Apr 15, 2017 2:30 pm
by LilyBug15
My heart just broke when I read this. My heart goes out to u. Can u tell me how if u were able to file an appeal and the outcome of that?