Neglect Allegations

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HappeeBee
Posts: 56
Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2011 6:56 am

Neglect Allegations

Postby HappeeBee » Wed Jul 13, 2011 9:12 am

So what do you do about them? DCF is saying we abused and neglecting our two kids-which is not true. we have provided as best as we can for them and i think that should count for something but all because we argue-which isnt alot-they say we're exposing our kids to abuse. i mean, i get it if it was a situation where we're beating each down but all we do is argue or disagree when we cant come to a compromise. i dont understand how DCF can tag you with a abuse just because couples have disagreements! who doesnt? i dont know one couple that doest argue or cant come to a compromise sometimes. i mean if thats the case...DCF/CPS should get every parent in this country for neglect! its just crazy and my husband and i dont know what to do...well we kinda do but we're just lost and need some help.

it seems like when you ask for help thats when people want to jump on you and call you eveyr bad name in the book!

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family_man
Posts: 1138
Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:02 am
Location: TX

Re: Neglect Allegations

Postby family_man » Wed Jul 13, 2011 11:46 am

There are several ways that the authorities can get the idea that parents argue:

1) They confide to their marriage counselor that they argue or disagree sometimes. The counselor then reports to DCF that the children may be exposed to family violence.

2) Neighbors hear loud voices emanating from the house and file a report of possible harm on the DCF hotline.

3) DCF investigates for some other reason and the parent admit, or the children blurt out that the parents argue sometimes.

You two need to present a united front to these people. Any whiff of hostility will be hyped and exploited to its max and used as an excuse to break up your family. Never confide to a marriage counselor about family disharmony until you're confident he/she won't report you. Keep all windows closed, even if the weather is nice outside. Never use loud voices or argue where you can be seen in public. And never, never admit anything negative to a DCF agent. No, you don't argue. All you have is family discussions. No there is no domestic violence. Yes, you're a happy family!

I'm afraid this is what the world has come to. You're the most vulnerable when you reach out for help, so don't do it.
Disclaimer: I am not an attorney, and this is not legal advice.

bss
Posts: 6
Joined: Sat Aug 13, 2011 2:32 am

Re: Neglect Allegations

Postby bss » Sat Aug 13, 2011 4:43 am

My ex-husband and I were tagged with "substantiated neglect". Because one night my ex-husband came to my home to pick-up our son for visitation. My ex-husband lost his temper and became violent with the child. I called the police. The police didn't do anything because they didn't actually "see" my ex-husband hit my child, push him up against the wall, and drag him down the stairs by his coat collar. DCF showed up two days later to interview me. They interviewed my son. My son and I told them the same story. When they interviewed my ex-husband, my ex-husband told them a COMPLETELY different story. Told them that I "picked a fight" with him and that he did not touch his son. Told them we were having an arguement and I called the police. So, DCF tagged us both with neglect for arguing in front of the child. THAT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENED! The man was hurting my son and I called the police. Because I did the RIGHT thing, I got tagged with neglect. This agency is OUT OF CONTROL! Oh, did I forget to mention that DCF NEVER interviewed the responding officers?

HappeeBee
Posts: 56
Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2011 6:56 am

Re: Neglect Allegations

Postby HappeeBee » Wed Aug 17, 2011 2:47 pm

bss wrote:My ex-husband and I were tagged with "substantiated neglect". Because one night my ex-husband came to my home to pick-up our son for visitation. My ex-husband lost his temper and became violent with the child. I called the police. The police didn't do anything because they didn't actually "see" my ex-husband hit my child, push him up against the wall, and drag him down the stairs by his coat collar. DCF showed up two days later to interview me. They interviewed my son. My son and I told them the same story. When they interviewed my ex-husband, my ex-husband told them a COMPLETELY different story. Told them that I "picked a fight" with him and that he did not touch his son. Told them we were having an arguement and I called the police. So, DCF tagged us both with neglect for arguing in front of the child. THAT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENED! The man was hurting my son and I called the police. Because I did the RIGHT thing, I got tagged with neglect. This agency is OUT OF CONTROL! Oh, did I forget to mention that DCF NEVER interviewed the responding officers?


Huh. They're supposed to request reports and talk to the officers :roll: They are out of control.

Beatthescammers
Posts: 259
Joined: Wed May 18, 2011 7:04 pm

Re: Neglect Allegations

Postby Beatthescammers » Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:07 pm

Yes, way out of control! My husband and I (married for 3 decades with older children in college) were investigated for neglect because our youngest child had minor kitten scratches (no scabs, just red parallel lines).


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