Why do they even come here now?

[Beatthescammers]

I don't know how I'm going to live without my daughter.

I hope you spend the time that you are temporarily apart from your daughter writing a tell-all book on America's very corrupt CPS agencies.

[angelheart83]

Wow. Your case is one of the worst. It is weird that they still want to do home visits even though your daughter is gone. I'm sorry about all they've done to you, and for how your lawyer hasn't even been on your side.

There is one thing that I'm actually jealous of you for. I want a cat like yours. I get scared whenever there is a knock on the door. My legs turn to jelly, I can barely move my legs or arms, and I literally get sick to my stomach and need to go to the bathroom. If I had a cat that only growled at CPS, I wouldn't have to be scared at every knock. The cat could tell me which knock was them. It's been a long time since I've dealt with CPS now, but the fear is definitely still there.

I'm sorry again for all you've gone through. It's terrible what they've done to you and your daughter. The last time you saw her, did you get the feeling that your daughter was still wanting you, or had she finally been duped again? I hope she tries to contact you on her 18th birthday. It won't be good enough to make up for lost time, but it's at least something to look forward to. She's old enough to know your name and look you up.

[noroses4u2c]

My daughter was tricked into agreeing to live with him because they promised she would get to see and talk to me more often if she did. She wanted to be with me so much that she agreed to live with a man she hates.

I have no idea how she'll find me when she turns 18. I'm going to find a way to move to and live in the same state she's in to try and help her find me easier.

My cat is very special. She's highly intelligent. She knows that case worker and knows that woman is the one that took her person away from her. My cats miss her too.

[angelheart83]

Well...if you keep your name the same and make your profile public, your daughter can search for you on Facebook. It may help to always have a pic of both of you together so she'll recognize it...or any picture that would be instantly recognizable to her. I hope she can find you. :/

[Live and Learn]

The only thing I can think of is if she is going to be adopted by step Mom they will be looking for adoption subsidy? Possibly? FOr her to qualify they would need your health history...mental health and all

[noroses4u2c]

I don't understand about adoption subsidy. I just know they view his new wife as her replacement mom.

[noroses4u2c]

He actually let her call me tonight for my birthday. There was a lot of background noise and I had trouble hearing her, but I got to talk to her for a few minutes.

[Eljay]

He actually let her call me tonight for my birthday. There was a lot of background noise and I had trouble hearing her, but I got to talk to her for a few minutes.

Oh YAY!!! How is she? Did she say anything significant? Please do tell!

[noroses4u2c]

The call was so jarbled I had trouble making out what was said.

She is doing much better in school since she's out of that foster home. (The only time she wasn't doing poorly in the foster home was when she had overnights with me and I helped her with her work.)

I could tell she was hesitant in her speaking. That's understandable since he'd be telling the government workers everything said, although he actually wasn't supposed to be letting her talk to me per court ruling. LOL So, he might not have said what she was saying afterall.

I let her know I was moving to Virginia by the end of the year. I'm finishing the thesis/degree first. And it'll take that long for jurisdiction to shift out there anyway, although if my rights are terminated it's a moot point. I'll help her get emancipated out there if need be though. She's really mature for her age.

[Beatthescammers]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! That's so wonderful that your daughter called on your birthday. She loves you! Your time apart from her will be temporary and short.

[treytrey1]

Happy Birthday! Our kids in Alabama were allowed to call us this past Wed on my husbands birthday. It was a real treat.
Im so happy you got to talk to your daughter.

[LindaJM]

The whole issue with TPR is kind of a waste of time, because in your daughter's heart and mind you're going to be her mom whether they TPR or not.

I think they're wasting taxpayer money by asking for more home visits and a psychological evaluation. The counties play this game where they get every bit of federal funding possible. They want the psychologist to get the Social Security funding money for "services" even though they're without meaning at this point.

It is up to you how you want to deal with these insane demands, but if it were me, I'd say that there will be no more home visits unless they are about to place your child back in your home. And I'd refuse to do the evaluation unless they're going to return the child. But that's just me. I don't know what exactly is going on there so am not sure what the best course of action for you is.

I'd also make a formal complaint about your lawyer - to your state's bar association.

I'm happy to hear your daughter phoned you. You see what she told her father she wanted for her birthday - to talk to you? Well, he'll have to accept that she loves you, and his wife will understand that too.

Great idea to move to VA... if it were me I'd move as close to her as possible, so she can visit you whenever she wants to. Good luck with that! You're a great mom... a loving mom! TPR means nothing in this case.

[Daxx27]

The call was so jarbled I had trouble making out what was said.

She is doing much better in school since she's out of that foster home. (The only time she wasn't doing poorly in the foster home was when she had overnights with me and I helped her with her work.)

I could tell she was hesitant in her speaking. That's understandable since he'd be telling the government workers everything said, although he actually wasn't supposed to be letting her talk to me per court ruling. LOL So, he might not have said what she was saying afterall.

I let her know I was moving to Virginia by the end of the year. I'm finishing the thesis/degree first. And it'll take that long for jurisdiction to shift out there anyway, although if my rights are terminated it's a moot point. I'll help her get emancipated out there if need be though. She's really mature for her age.

I am new here and am only catching a bit of your story.

First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY and I'm so glad you got to talk to her! AND Happy Easter!

If the call was garbled and there was a lot of background noise, she could have been made to talk to you on speaker phone. I don't know if VA or KY is a one or two party consent state for recording calls. I hope the call wasn't recorded.

[noroses4u2c]

Virginia is two party. KY is one party.

It is court ordered that I don't have contact with her, so he'd be violating the court order by allowing the phone call. I don't know why he would record his own violation. Although, they totally adore him and look the other way when he does things, so I guess it wouldn't matter.

It probably was on speakerphone.

[noroses4u2c]

This one group I joined that is supposed to be about exposing CPS has me upset. The administrator over there keeps insisting that I work it out with my ex and going on about how I had loved and respected him at one point and telling me how I was guilty of alienating her from her father. I am so tired of it. She sounds just like the CPS workers. I had already posted how his visitation rights were terminated by the courts years ago because he was threatening to kill my daughter and me and she's going on yeah, he's a jerk but he still needed to be in her life. Why? So he could abuse and kill her?? If this is what our side has in regards to fighting CPS then we're in so much trouble. And it's like she copy/pastes the same reply over and over again sometimes. She doesn't even understand what domestic violence is all about. She acts like rape is no big deal and just a disagreement.

I am so sick and tired of being told I loved and respected that man. I never wanted to be with him in the first place. I was intimidated and bullied into the relationship and no one helped me get out of it. I was just a child. It should say a lot about his character that he seeks out teenaged children to bully into sexual relations instead of trying to start a normal relationship with someone more equal to himself.

[Beatthescammers]

Ewww. That sounds toxic. Does that site have an ignore button?

[noroses4u2c]

Ewww. That sounds toxic. Does that site have an ignore button?

Only thing to do is leave the group. Yes, it is very toxic. And this was her response to me posting about how the relationship had been forced from the beginning. That is like someone telling that to Jaycee Dugard that she should try to get along with that monster that held her captive for all those years. I could seriously image this woman doing that. Seriously.

I feel for anyone going to that site for help with CPS. And they don't even get it about CPS. I posted what they had done and they literally accused me of coming up with conspiracy theories. They defended the cps worker! Uh, they're supposed to be helping people fight cps? It is like it is a group of social workers giving out advice. Literally! I feel like I'm talking to social workers.

And this was the group owner/head administrator talking to me like that. I was infuriated! I get so angry about it when people tell me that I loved him and chose him. I most certainly did not! I cared about this guy from my classes at the former high school. We got along great. This monster was mad that I spoke to him and made me call him and say things to him to break it off with him saying he would do all sorts of things to him if I didn't. He had already raped me. I was terrified of him hurting this guy. This monster stole everything I had. I most certainly never loved him. I hated him from almost the beginning. I wanted him dead. I daydreamed of him dying.

And now he has my girl.

This group does not seem to help anyone. Instead, they attack the people posting there accusing them of things they'd have no way of knowing the person did it or not.

Yes, it is very toxic. I'm still upset over what she said to me. It was similar to what one of the cps workers said to me, almost word for word. It was very triggering.

[Beatthescammers]

Similar to CPS workers over there, eh? Damn.....that's bad! LOL

That administrator has issues if she is arguing with members about their feelings. Good gawd! Validating another’s feeling or emotion costs nothing, is simple to do, and is calming. Invalidating a person’s feeling frequently escalates the painfulness/uncomfortableness of that individual’s feeling.

You survived and got away from your abusive ex. Power to you! (I think teens now say, "You go, girl!) Mean people suck!

[noroses4u2c]

I have officially deregistered from that group. It felt good. It felt real real good.

[noroses4u2c]

I have figured/found out that my daughter was sending me a cryptic message when she was talking to me. Basically, he is moving away somewhere and I am not going to know where in the world she is. She told me that these friends of hers were moving, and I asked them, and they were not moving. He was right there with her throughout the call, so she wouldn't have been able to tell me.

I'm not going to have any way to find my girl. And I don't know how she'll ever be able to find me one day.

[Beatthescammers]

Your daughter loves you! She won't let this happen. If the ahole moves her, she will find you via Facebook or Myspace. Her dad can't control her ability to contact you or her old friends with she is at school or a friend's home. If your daughter doesn't have a phone, she will use a friend's smartphone at school or work to contact you and her old friends.

All teenagers rebel against tight control. The more her dad attempts to control her contact with you, the harder your daughter will fight to contact you.

If he moves and pays one utility bill in his name, pays a car payment, registers to vote, (or several hundred thousand other things), he can be found quickly on the internet. My computer skills stink, but I am really good at tracking down people with the internet. If he moves, I'll help you find him.

[noroses4u2c]

At schools nowadays the parent has to sign a permission slip to allow the child to access the internet at school.

This man literally had deadbolts on the apartment door to where you needed a key to unlock the door in order to keep me locked in the apartment.

He is the type of person that he would kill her to keep control over her. He has killed before and didn't get caught. He knows how to get away with it.

I'm terrified he'll kill her.

[noroses4u2c]

My daughter was so smart in how she snuck me the message. I didn't even catch on to it until tonight.


Where do I move now? I was going to move to Virginia, but she is not going to be there. Where do I move so she can find me some day?

[Beatthescammers]

That is scary. I am sorry that you have such intense worries.

Your daughter has been described as a smart teenager. You taught her about danger and her dad. She has very likely completely figured him out using the knowledge you directly or indirectly gave her. She has the brains and the knowledge to know how to stay alive while living with him for the short time before she turns 18.

Yeah, that was very clever to send you a message in that manner. She is clever and will find you via the internet.

[Beatthescammers]

Move someplace that you and she will both enjoy when she is soon released from her CPS kidnapping.