Domestic nightmare!!! please give advice

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Domestic nightmare!!! please give advice

Postby Waterski » Sat Jan 02, 2016 8:18 pm

My husband and I had two domestics between just us over a 10 month period. My five year old was not home at the time either time and DCFS has verified this. They entered into a safety plan while they supposedly investigated. Well, now the states attorney said my kid cant cone home cuz shes seen to many babies die because of people like my husband????? WHAT!!!!!! My husband loves my child and has never ever harmed him EVER!!!! I am a full time nurse. We are totally NOT pieces of shit by any means. My child was not even home during any fighting. What can i do????? Oh, and i just found out im pregnant. Please, i need advice. Thanks

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Re: Domestic nightmare!!! please give advice

Postby whosechildrenarethey » Sun Jan 03, 2016 10:23 am

This link will take you to Illinois Department of Children and Family Services Policy's and Procedures: ... guide.aspx

This link specifically deals with Safety Plans which are "VOLUNTARY": ... 014.20.pdf

I understand from your comment that you have been told your child/ren are not allowed to come home. Is the court involved? Do you have court orders stating such? If not then the next step the department has to take is to take the entire matter before a Judge. Only the Judge can order your child/ren temporarily removed from your custody and continued in out of home placement unless you voluntarily agree to continue to do so.

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Re: Domestic nightmare!!! please give advice

Postby Waterski » Sun Jan 03, 2016 7:35 pm

No, have never been to court. Im under a safety plan and hes staying at my moms. I have full access to my child, but am not allowed to be alone with him. The states attorney for DCFS is the one saying my kid cant come home. They keep continuing the safety plan every week. Its crazy.

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Re: Domestic nightmare!!! please give advice

Postby LindaJM » Mon Jan 04, 2016 2:36 pm

If you don't have a good lawyer yet, you should try to get one now. If they take you to court you could be placed on the central index and it could interfere with your nursing profession.

You could probably ask your husband to leave and then get your child back. But so long as he's in the home you're in danger of losing your children permanently.

Alternatively you could let your child live with your mom, and let the case close, and move out of the area before they know you're pregnant.

In any case, if you're being physically assaulted by your husband, that's always going to be seen as a volatile situation that children shouldn't be exposed to.

In some custody disputes the judges give the children to the abusive partner and not to the person complaining of being hurt. It is totally unpredictable. Justice is rarely served in family or juvenile courts, it seems.
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Please keep in mind that none of us are lawyers and we can't give legal advice. We are simply telling you what we would do in a similar situation. It is to your advantage to get a lawyer.

"Evil flourishes when good men do nothing." - Edmund Burke ... so try to do something to change the system ...

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Re: Domestic nightmare!!! please give advice

Postby jrygiel3880 » Thu Feb 11, 2016 10:20 pm

I am currently going through the same thing. My husband and I got into 2 altercations. The first incident, my children we're not there. On the second occasion, we argued, the neighbors called the police and they told my husband to go for a walk. Before I knew it, CPS was in my face having me sign voluntary safety plans. They kept on continuing the plans, so I finally hired a criminal defense attorney who deals with CPS. I hope your case worked out okay. I am praying that this nightmare will eventually come to an end.

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