We finally got our FIRST court date

Are you going through an investigation now? Tell your story and get feedback here.

Moderators: family_man, LindaJM

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

We finally got our FIRST court date

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Wed Oct 19, 2005 8:38 am

Well it seems we get to spend all day on the 24th in the courtroom. This will be the FIRST time in front of the judge sice the abduction of our grandchildren on the evening of the 12th. Certainly well beyond the 72 hour period that the guidelines state. Additionally, they want to do a home study of our home to see if the boys can be placed here. I am thinking tht the boys behavior, and the fact that 2 DAYS in their care put the older one in the hospital for 4 days has probably scared the heck out of them.... yeah we are looking at negligence charges on them.

My husband has come up with a plan. You see the older boy is a 2 yr old in a 5 yr old body. Ihave stated to him that I could probably handle the younger but both would honestly be impossible for me to do. His plan is to suggest that Jen voluntarily sign over custody of the younger to us, and the older to the state to have him institutionalized. it sounds terrible but when you consider that there is no way that we can afford instutionalized care for the older who will need to be placed there at some point, added to the fact that the older boy is very strong and we believe (although not diagnosed) he is bi-polar seeing as one minute he is sweet and loving and in the blink of an eye he is the spawn of Satan, biting kicking punching ect. It is our feeling that the older boy is not only a danger to himself, but to his younger brother, who when the older is at school is the sweetest child you could ever see, but as soon as the older comes home he follows the actions of the older and becomes a terror. We worry that the 2 of them will get into yet another fight over some toy, and lets imagine its a big tonka truck, and the older will bean the younger in the head with it as hard as he can. Then where will we be? He doesnt know any better, and trying to teach him right and wrong has been an impossibility. He gets time out for something and as soon as he gets out of it, he goes right back and does it again... over and over He NEEDS to be in a place where there is someone monitoring him 24/7 and we can not provide that for him, nor can my step daughter as much as she tries.

Because the state has effectively taken custody of both boys, this is probably the best chance of getting him into an institution which he desperately needs, without breaking us in the process. They get his SS check for his care, and can get state and federal programs as well, we still get to be part of his life, visiting him and all that, He gets care and training so badly needed. Hell, maybe they can find his father who ran off as soon as he found out the child was disabled and can get child support off him. We sure havent been successful in that search.

I know it sounds cold and heartless, but it isnt. We believe that it is in the best interest of both boys that the older be institutionalized. I dont have the skills to deal with a severly disabled child, never have. I don't like the idea that one of the grandbabies would be in there, but at some point you have to face reality. The reality of the older boy is that he will always be a child, and while now I am bigger and stronger, before long that will not be the case, and in the mean time the younger suffers.

The origional post can be found at:

http://fightcps.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=2269
Cindy Gialluca

"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

User avatar
kdddav
Posts: 202
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2005 6:32 pm

Postby kdddav » Wed Oct 19, 2005 9:48 am

I'm going to be the first to tell ya, but they are setting you up.

Cooperating with the system is the fastest way to lose your own kids, even if you're trying to simply get the out of control kid help. A home study on you? Do you realize the dangers this places you in? The complaint and issues are with your daughter, not you. But this so called home study is another word for investigation.

And if you ask about it, call them to the carpet on it, ask the procedures and get told and shown on paper in a satisfactionary type of convincing you, the moment they open a file with your name and address on it with your own kids living there, you are gonna regret it.

If the 5 year old needs help, and needs it badly, then that is for a psychiatrist to say, one who is not affiliated with CPS. (IF CPS recommends the shrink, he is affiliated with them and will draw conclusions for CPS, not for the boy.)

They get more than his SS check. Did you look up the ASFA and CAPTA and Social Security Title IV-E yet? Think Title IV-E is SSI for children? It's not. It's an addiitional program to pay for children in state custody. Let me tell you how much, rounded down to the next dollar, they are gonna get for that one 5 year old boy. These figures are not made up, they come from the National Resource Center on Child Abuse and Neglect when CEO Leonard Henderson of AFRA (American Family Rights Association) used the Freedom of Information Act to glean fact sheets from them as they stopped publishing the data publicaly a long time ago, because it damns CASA and CPS.

Yearly, for a child with medical needs, $56,000 bucks a year. That is NOT State Child Welfare that pays the facility or Foster Parent or extra money for appoints and evaluations. That is the hard bare minimum cash they get for having him. Not to mention that the Social Worker themselves get a $2,000 bonus check on top of it.

And now they want to look at your house by calling it a Home Study.

You have to treat CPS like a vial of nitroglycerine. Move very carefully, expect things to blow up and destroy you at any given moment until the ordeal is under control.

That boy needs help, get him placed into your custody without them poking their noses into your closests (yes, they will open your closests and look inside and under everything cause the judge said they could do a Home Study). Then get him to a Shrink refered by the kid's primary physician and they will get him help in the safety of your home. Make sure it's YOU who calls the shots on him if he has to be institutionalized. Helion or not, if you knew the abuse he will go through in their hands, you would lift weights till ya got strong enough to wrestle Hulk Hogan so you could save that boy from their cluctches. And after that Home Study. if they decide your place would not be the best place for the kid, (any kid and most likely will say no) then the kids who live there have to go too... you see how this is lining up to burn you yet? Remember, the Judge is on CPS's side no matter how nice he is unless this is the Supreme Court.

There is a reason why everyone on this board won't let them in a house without a warrant showing probable cause for danger to children.

Step very carefully. One misunderstanding on your part or one lie to the judge from CPS will get your kids yanked too. Just one. No second chances. Nitroglycerine.

The Tech
"The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth becomes the greatest enemy of the State." —Dr. Joseph M. Goebbels, Hitler’s Propaganda Minister

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Wed Oct 19, 2005 11:10 am

Im not worried about my step son who still lives with us. He is out of their clutches. He turned 18 last friday.

What I am worried about is the fact that I have $2200 worth of German shepherd puppies that we set up a room for in our house, and should they come over an hour or 2 after I have cleaned that room (done 3 times daily) and one of the puppies has deficated (which we all know puppies do on a regular bases [they are 6 weeks yesterday]) Then not only do I have to worry that the boys will be denied to us, but they could very well call those bogus animal cops will be called in and not only will those puppies be gone but one dog worth 10 grand and another worth about 12 grand will be taken too. Does anyone remember the expose that 20/20 did on the humane society guy in Dallas who would come in and take pictures at an inoppertune time, show them to the judge and have the persons animals taken? Dallas isnt that far from us) The dog worth 12 grand is a show dog. If they happen to show up between kennel cleaning tme... poof there go the dogs and we are charged with animal abuse.

No, I too am against any "home study" and CPS spending months or years poking their noses into my private life. However my husband is looking at it as anything to get the boys back. Personally, I think we should fight them in court and point out the falsifications in their reports. They claim to have interviewd my step daughters boyfriend, and have stated in court papers that things said were said by him, not by my step daughter, who was the one to ACTUALLY say them. The ONLY question asked to her live in boyfriend was if the dog in their house belonged to him. Nothing else. For all I know they claim to have interviewed me, which she finally did over the phone yesterday and asked me if I did drugs, to which I told her that I was currently taking hydrocodone perscribed to me as a pain killer post surgical. She then qualified by saying "illegal'. II said No I do not take drugs recreationally. She asked if I drank. I told her that the last alcoholic beverage I can recall having was probably 6 months ago. that yes we have an almost empty bottle of tequila (purchased for a party at another residence and we got the remainder) and an almost full bottle of rum (purchased for the same party... in April) that had been there since. BTW that party in april was the last time I can recall having a drink and then it was 1 maybe 2 pina coladas. She ten asked me if I knew why my step daughter had missed an IEP meeting at the Round Rock school for the older boy. I told her I did not but that the only reason I could speculate was she didnt have transportation, but that I could not testify to that. Now the thing is she interviewd me AFTER my step daughter was served her paperwork... and I have it documented as to the time and date of the "interview", not to mention what was said.

I told her that I didnt think we'd be interested in this "home study" as we felt that this whoe thing was handled wrong and that the boys should have been released to us the night they were abducted (yes I used that word). That at that time we were willing to cooperate, but that time was past. her statement to me was "your lack of cooperation does nothing but hurt the boys and it prolongs the process."

She then told me that I was there when she told my husband and step daughter why the boys were not going with us at that time. I told her then that I was NOT there, and had gone out to have a cigarette. That it was only when I returned and discovered 2 police officers in front of the door, my husband telling her that she had "just bought big trouble", my youngest grandson being taken away by a nurse, and the oldest being held by my stepdaughter, and my stepdaughter screaming. I also told her at that time I asked the nurse with the younger what was going on, but she didnt say anything. My stepdaughter then ran out of the room (from what my husband says the CW ripped the older boy out of my step daughters arms just before she ran out) and I sent my husband to go catch up with her as she was not in a good state. I then asked the CW what was going on to which she told me that the state was taking custody of the children. I mentioned that she had told us not an hour before that they would be released to us, to which she said they were not. I then asked "why?" to which she told me "You may leave now." I looked her in the face and said "fine you will be hearing from the attorneys." She then repeated in an angry and forceful tone "YOU MAY LEAVE NOW!!"

I believe it is the statement about it not being good for the boys and it only prolonging the issue that has softened my husbands stand. I will have him read what you wrote kd and see what he says.
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

User avatar
AllForThisSite
Posts: 165
Joined: Tue Aug 02, 2005 11:27 am

Postby AllForThisSite » Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:45 pm

Cyneca_GSD

Maybe my heart is going to throw itself out there as cold and mean but I don't want you to think of me that way because that is definitely not the type of person that I am. But when I read your post about helping your step-daughter out with the younger kid but not the older because of behavior issues, it made me feel really bad for the little 5 year old. The reason is, when he grows up in foster care because of behavior problems--you've stated that he may or may not be bi-polar--how is that little guy going to feel as he gets older and knows that his younger sibling remained in the family and not him? He is going to feel even worse about that and about himself. He'll grow up thinking nobody wanted him because no one wanted to deal with him and you mix that with bi-polar and it's just the right push somebody needs to start on the road to tragedy. Is there not someone else in the family that could take him? You said this was your step-daughter, so is there a mother around somewhere that can help her out? Is there an aunt, cousin, family friend, uncle, somebody that can take this 5 year old so that he can remain close to you all? Please don't take what I say to sound mean it just breaks my heart that this little guy would have to go while the other one stayed. And I know you don't mean it to be that way because you've said in your posts that you love them both but handling them both is hard for you. I think if someone took this child and had no other children but him that he would do a 360 on ya. He'd have more 1-on-1 and he'd probably calm down a lot. My heart goes out to you, it really does. I just feel bad for both kids.
P.A.S.S.
Parents Against Social Services
http://144418.aceboard.net/

You can't run with the big dogs if you pee like a puppy!

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Wed Oct 19, 2005 3:26 pm

I am NOT advocating he stay in foster care system. What I AM saying is that the state can better afford him to be placed in a facility that has staff trained to see to his special needs, something that we can not do.

Secondly, and I have to be brutally honest here, I have not the training nor the patience to handle a child with his kind of disability, nor do I have the desire to give away the remainder of my life on a child that will never grow up, just get bigger.

Remember this is my step grandson and while I did sign up to raise my husbands children, and have done so to the best of my ability, I did so with the knowlege that one day I could be a grand parent and that THEY could raise their kids.

It's not that I love him any less, its just that I know my limitations. Don't you think it is far better to be willing to admit to your own limitations then to have the child suffer because you cant deal with his problems? Sure hes 5 now, and small enough for me to control, but what happens when hes 10 or 14? When hes bigger and stronger then I am? How do I explane that in a fit of temper the older boy picked up a tonka truck and beaned his brother on the head causing serious if not fatal results? I can not handle something this volitile, and I know it. Better he be placed in an institution where he is safe and can be handled.

Maybe that makes me heartless, or cruel, or whatever, but to expect me to be faced with a child who will have to be cared for for the rest of his life, who his mother even now says that she can not handle, and she has been trying for 5 1/2 years now, who admits that he'd probably be better off in a place where his special needs can be addressed and handled, is asking more then I am either willing or able to give.
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

User avatar
Chaco
Posts: 358
Joined: Sat May 21, 2005 2:15 am
Location: Central California

Postby Chaco » Wed Oct 19, 2005 4:50 pm

Maybe that makes me heartless, or cruel, or whatever, but to expect me to be faced with a child who will have to be cared for for the rest of his life, who his mother even now says that she can not handle, and she has been trying for 5 1/2 years now, who admits that he'd probably be better off in a place where his special needs can be addressed and handled, is asking more then I am either willing or able to give.


No, don't say that. I don't think anyone sees you as cold or heartless. :cry:

I see you as someone knowing what they can handle and trying to make provisions accordingly.

I think what people are asking you is if you can think of ANY other way then the supposed "help" from CPS. Maybe a different family member that can take the older boy? I don't think anyone doubts what you're saying about your oldest grandson needing extra help, I think they just feel bad for him that CPS may be your only option and everyone is hoping you can come up with someone BETTER then those horrible wicked people.

Chaco
My thought for the day.........
CPS workers are like Slinkies

Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Wed Oct 19, 2005 5:20 pm

There is no one willing or able to care for this child in our family. you have to understand, his biological grandmother cant do it. There was a very good and valid reason the judge gave custody to their father all those years ago, and she never once made any attempt to contact them afterwards. she only became part of my step daughters life a couple years ago when my step daughter looked her up. The middle child (my older step son) continues to be angry at her for not making any attempt to keep in touch, and the youngest states he doesnt even remember her, much less has any desire to talk to her, even though I have encouraged him to do so. In his mind I am his mother.

His maturnal great grand parents on his mothers mothers side are deceased. His great grandparents on his mothers fathers side can not take him in as they are too old and cant handle him. On his fathers side, well since the day his father took off for parts unknown (the state cant even find him) there has been no contact or desire to have a relationship with his son. His fathers mother cant be found, and only made minimal attempts to contact her grandson and only during the first year of his life.

My step sons can not take him on as one is on the Eisenhower, and the other is finishing his senior year in High School. My husbands brothers and sister have their own families and can not add to them. My brother is in college and going through a divorce so he's out.

In other words its either us or the state, and as I have said before, I cant handle him. I know I cant do for him as he needs to be done. I can not give him the 1 on 1 attention 24/7 that he requires. I know my limitations and honestly if we can manage to save one of the boys then its better then none. God knows I hate the idea of him being "lost in the system", of him being left at the mercy of the state, but I am hoping that will not be the case. Taht he will be placed in a home, institution, whatever you want to call it, where he CAN get the attention and skills that he will need to survive in this world. I want to continue to have contact with him, visit him let him know that yes, we DO still care. However I seriously doubt that he will make the connection of "they wanted him but didnt want me", as that is way beyond anything he has shown thus far in comprehention.

I have prayed that he will have some kind of life where he can function as an adult, but I know it is doubtful, and have been told by those much more trained in dealing with special needs children that he will never be a functional adult. I continue to pray that they, and I are wrong. And to be honest, i'd rather him hate me forever for not taking him, then have him and he do something awful to his brother, or have to send him, in the end to exactly the kind of place I hope that he goes to now. He is far more likely to adapt to his situation now then when he is 12 or 13 and has to be placed.

I pray to GOD that I am wrong about him and that one day I will have to explane my reasonings for what we are proposing to do today. Because if I do have to explane myself and my actions to him, that means he got better, and honestly that would be a miracle.
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

User avatar
scarfyrre
Posts: 419
Joined: Tue Aug 23, 2005 2:25 pm
Location: Fulton County, GA

Postby scarfyrre » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:43 pm

I can't even imagine the pain you must be feeling right now. I know my first reaction was 'don't give him to the state!!', but only you know the details and how best to help him. So, all I can do is tell you I'll pray for you and your family, for the boys to be healthy and safe, and that everything works out for the best for you and yours.

(I have no idea what disabilities the oldest has, but it's unlikely he's bi-polar. One minute sweet, the next mean isn't how that disease works, so I suppose his moodiness is a result of his disability. I'm not judging or anything, but I am bi-polar, I've researched it for my own child, and one second mood swings isn't bi-polar. It takes a while for us to cycle. Just ask my husband. :wink: I only mention this because if you are giving him up, do not say this to anyone. The drugs are worse than the disease for children, and we've used behavioral for our son. If you tell the state that, they'll drug him to his eyeballs and hurt his little brain even more. And if anyone says he's bi-polar, don't believe them. It can't even be diagnosed until after age six. I hope God, Goddess, Spirit, Jehova, Allah, and any other god I forgot to mention blesses you and yours. I'd give you a big hug if I could.)

angeredmom
Posts: 98
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:45 pm
Location: omaha nebraska
Contact:

Postby angeredmom » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:55 pm

OK just a suggestion and i dont even know if it goes from state to state but my fiance's sister has a son whos blind and even tho hes 18 he was found to be unable to take care of himself (keep in mind that hes blind and went to school to learn how to but the state felt other wise) and was going to charge her with neglect if she did so... so she did some investigating and found out that the state CAN bring support into your home.. yes they can even supply you with around the clock care... especially if hes on social securtity not only that but from what EVERYONE here is telling me its social services responcibility to reunify the family with these children and if this is with this child needs then they in turn CAN supply this for you to me even tho i dont know much i feel like your daughter or daughter in law ect... saying that the state can have one and then you guys having the other will be VERY bad for her case in the long run and they WILL use this against her trust me they made things up about me... and used the fact that my family is 1700 miles away and cant move here to help with my kids against me....
i understand you dont want to bite off more then you can chew but the state did this THEY decided to take the kids... so make them pay for the care... if they find you fit enough to have the kids then MAKE then pay for a home care specialist i have seen this done with my fiance's sister so i know its not impossible... even tho her son was not taken away and they were saying that she could not leave him alone due to his disabilities its the same principal... so i would check into all your options before you go jumping the gun on what you think at the momment looks good because in the long run you could be hating yourself for it later on
again im not thinking badly of you just giving my opinion on the matter and hoping that the little bit of knowledge that i do have helps

god bless and i hope all goes well for you

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Wed Oct 19, 2005 8:33 pm

Ok here is what the older boy suffers from:

Septo-optic dysplasia
hypo pitutarism
Hypo thyroidism
possible addisons disease (was treated for it but Dr now says he doesnt have it) also known as hypocortisolism
mental retardation
behavioral and emotional problems
bilateral retnoblastoma (cancer of the eyes) in remission
prosthetic left eye
legally blind in right eye

Here is what I found on the Septo-optic dysplasia:

Septooptic dysplasia (SOD) is a clinically heterogeneous disorder loosely defined by any combination of optic nerve hypoplasia, pituitary gland hypoplasia, and agenesis or hypoplasia of midline brain structures, including the corpus callosum and septum pellucidum. It is thought of a disorder of midline prosencephalic development. The symptoms, which occur especially when a disorder of cortical development is also present (SOD plus) consist of visual defects, endocrinological manifestations, developmental delay, motor deficits, and epileptic seizures. The syndrome is rare, affecting less than 1 in 10.000 livebirths, and the phenotype is highly variable. Sixty-two per cent of affected individuals have hypopituitarism and 30% have all three manifestations. Diagnosis usually relies on CT scan or MRI of the brain. Male often have micropenis and cryptorchidism, and hypoglycemia may be detected in the first hours of age. Pituitary dysfunction is the most common, revealed by growth hormone deficiency and failure of the pituitary to respond to thyrotropin releasing hormone. Transient hypocalcemia responds to calcium and vitamin D supplements. Most have corticotropin deficiency, with sometimes thermoregulatory disturbances, and others have diabetes insipidus. Sudden and unexpected death was reported in at least 5 children with septooptic dysplasia. In case of early diagnosis, when anterior pituitary hormone replacement therapy can be begun in the first week of life, patients may remain well subsequently. Severe psychomotor retardation was reported in some patients. All have short stature, but head circumference and weight are within normal limits. Although most cases of pituitary hypoplasia are sporadic and idiopathic, a few sib pairs have been reported with SOD, suggesting a genetic basis in some cases, with an autosomal dominant mode of inheritance. Heterozygous mutations in the HESX1 gene were found in a number of patients with relatively mild pituitary hypoplasia or SOD, which displayed incomplete penetrance and variable phenotype among heterozygous family members. Septo-optic dysplasia was also reported as a manifestation of valproic acid embryopathy : a newborn who was exposed to the drug in utero throughout pregnancy presented with features typical of valproic acid embryopathy, and MRI showed hypoplasia of the optic chiasm and absence of the septum pellucidum. * Author: Dr E. Robert-Gnansia (June 2004)*.


Addison's Disease (hypocortisolism)

Addison's disease is a rare endocrine, or hormonal disorder that affects about 1 in 100,000 people. It occurs in all age groups and afflicts men and women equally. The disease is characterized by weight loss, muscle weakness, fatigue, low blood pressure, and sometimes darkening of the skin in both exposed and nonexposed parts of the body.

Addison's disease occurs when the adrenal glands do not produce enough of the hormone cortisol and in some cases, the hormone aldosterone. For this reason, the disease is sometimes called chronic adrenal insufficiency, or hypocortisolism.

Cortisol is normally produced by the adrenal glands, located just above the kidneys. It belongs to a class of hormones called glucocorticoids, which affect almost every organ and tissue in the body. Scientists think that cortisol has possibly hundreds of effects in the body. Cortisol's most important job is to help the body respond to stress. Among its other vital tasks, cortisol:

helps maintain blood pressure and cardiovascular function;

helps slow the immune system's inflammatory response;

helps balance the effects of insulin in breaking down sugar for energy; and

helps regulate the metabolism of proteins, carbohydrates, and fats.

Because cortisol is so vital to health, the amount of cortisol produced by the adrenals is precisely balanced. Like many other hormones, cortisol is regulated by the brain's hypothalamus and the pituitary gland, a bean-sized organ at the base of the brain. First, the hypothalamus sends "releasing hormones" to the pituitary gland. The pituitary responds by secreting other hormones that regulate growth, thyroid and adrenal function, and sex hormones such as estrogen and testosterone. One of the pituitary's main functions is to secrete ACTH (adrenocorticotropin), a hormone that stimulates the adrenal glands. When the adrenals receive the pituitary's signal in the form of ACTH, they respond by producing cortisol. Completing the cycle, cortisol then signals the pituitary to lower secretion of ACTH.

Aldosterone belongs to a class of hormones called mineralocorticoids, also produced by the adrenal glands. It helps maintain blood pressure and water and salt balance in the body by helping the kidney retain sodium and excrete potassium. When aldosterone production falls too low, the kidneys are not able to regulate salt and water balance, causing blood volume and blood pressure to drop.

Addison's disease can cause irritability and depression. Because of salt loss, a craving for salty foods also is common. Hypoglycemia, or low blood glucose, is more severe in children than in adults. In women, menstrual periods may become irregular or stop.

Because the symptoms progress slowly, they are usually ignored until a stressful event like an illness or an accident causes them to become worse. This is called an addisonian crisis, or acute adrenal insufficiency. In most cases, symptoms are severe enough that patients seek medical treatment before a crisis occurs. However, in about 25 percent of patients, symptoms first appear during an addisonian crisis.

Symptoms of an addisonian crisis include sudden penetrating pain in the lower back, abdomen, or legs; severe vomiting and diarrhea, followed by dehydration; low blood pressure; and loss of consciousness. Left untreated, an addisonian crisis can be fatal.



Yes he still craves salt going as far as licking the tops of salt shakersm dumping salt on the table and licking it off.
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

angeredmom
Posts: 98
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:45 pm
Location: omaha nebraska
Contact:

Postby angeredmom » Thu Oct 20, 2005 6:27 pm

please dont get angry for what im about to say... my son was born with seriouse heart problems and was misdiagnosed due to this he suffered brain damage not to mention the fact that i hemoraged with him due to pre placenta separation ( i was in a very bad car accident when i was younger and was told i would never have kids but god blessed me anyway) so my son is mentally 3 even tho hes physically 6 years of age... he was 9 months old before he sat up... 2 years old before he took his first steps... and 3 years old before he said his first words... i fought like crazy for all his firsts telling him YOU CAN DO IT... even tho the doctors say he probably wouldnt... he recently had heart surgery and is doing tons better... my point is this i have been fighting for years to keep him out of the so called "institutions" and this is why...

my grand mother suffered from paratinitis due to a blood clot in her intestines killing off all of her large intestines and a good portion of her small intestines i watched her be put into an "institution" where because those people didnt care for her BECAUSE they are not family and have no feelings for her they pretty much ignored her i came in one day to her ventilater being unplugged from her throat to see her drowning... her alarms were going off and the nurses were chit chatting the whole time... later on after tests we found out that she was brain damaged due to this and was then a vegtable legally speaking... she winded up dying due to the "institutions" from pnemonia...

state institutions are NOT fun, lack funding the majority of the time in my opinion and the major thing is they dont love the people they are taking care for and often become desensitised... sad but true not to mention in my opinion i feel like that would be a pretty dramatic change for a child that has probably never seen the inside of an institution.

not trying to sway you or make you feel bad for how you feel hey you know your limits and of course if you cant handle taking care of him it could make things worse im just concerned all the way around for the both of you as i suggested before social services can supply you with the means to take care of him and even give you around the clock care for him... or another person honustly i would look into all my options before signing anything or telling the courts or social services a thing... i told you about my fiance's sisters son and i can tell you with my son i had people coming to my house 3 times a week he had a speech theripist that not only helped me try to get him to talk but taught him sign langauge... he had a physical theripist come to the house to work on his walking and sitting up... and he had a developmental theripist come to the home to help him with his motor skills and comprehension ect...

i hope what im telling you helps the agency that helped me was called "Child Find" i dont know if they can help you in your situation or your daughters but its worth a shot and even if they cant they can maybe point you in the right direction anyways good luck and my thoughts are with you

god bless

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Thu Oct 20, 2005 9:42 pm

I understand what you are saying, really I do. Now I need you to understand what I am saying. I know that contact with the older boy is detrimental for the younger. I know that handling this child when he is older will be dangerous for me (and I will be the primary care giver) and for the younger boy as the older is already jealous of him and seeks to do things to him. I know that he is way too much for me to handle. I know that it would only be a matter of time with nurses and so forth in my home before its my name on the paperwork, instead of my step daughters.

I am a breeder of German Shepherd dogs. We have a room in our home set up for puppies, for birthing them, and for raising them. I clean that room 3 times a day so that there is never much in the way of puppy diamonds to have to deal with. But, it wouldnt take much, and if I had a litter bigger then the 4 I currently have, before the nurse would call CPS in because the puppys had deficated on the paper in that room in my home. Then not only does my name go on the top of a piece of paper for a CPS investigation, it also goes on the top of a paper for a SPCA investigation and I loose it all, dogs and kids. I can not and will not jepordize that.

Truely I do understand that you want me to take them both. what I am telling you is that there is too much at stake to do that, its either the younger or none. Thats the way it is. I dont have the room for both, I dont have the time for both, I dont have the ability for both, and I dont have the money for both. It is selfish I know, but this is my time to do the things I enjoy, and while the younger will put a cramp in my style, he wont make it impossible. the older will, just because of his problems.

Besides I dont think it is selfish at all to know what you can and can not do. You have to understand, I HAVE lived with this child, I have dealt with his disabilities, and I HAVE had people in my home to assist. It didnt work. I am not saying this from lack of experience in living with him, I am not saying this without having at least tried. I have dealt with his removing his diaper so that he can fingerpaint his room with feces. I have dealt with his refusal to eat anything but PB and J sandwiches, and forcing himself to vomit if he gets anything else. I have lived with him breaking the safety locks on the refirgerator so that he can pull everything out, dump it on the floor and spread it from one end of my house to the other. It is not that I fear what I DONT know... its that I fear what I DO know, and that it will get worse.

What do you imagine will happen when he has broken into the refrigerator, spread butter, milk, mayonase, eggs and everything else he can fine throughout my home at 3 AM because he managed to break the child door knob covers during the night, and either his nurse shows up or worse yet the CPS CW comes by? he has done this, not once, not twice, but on numerous occasions. what do you imagine will happen if he choses to practice his fecal artwork on the walls in his room, and either of those people show up while I am trying to get it cleaned up. And he does this not once a day, not twice a day, but numerous times a day. and because it looks like so much fun, his younger brother joins in. I have had this child come at me with toys, I have had him hit, kick and bite me. I have had to patch holes in the walls where he has kicked or hit them. No, I can not handle this. Not physically, and not mentally. I will walk away from this entire family first.
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

User avatar
Chaco
Posts: 358
Joined: Sat May 21, 2005 2:15 am
Location: Central California

Postby Chaco » Fri Oct 21, 2005 3:00 am

No, I can not handle this. Not physically, and not mentally. I will walk away from this entire family first.


You know what Cyneca, you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to!!! I don't know about anyone else, but I do understand what you're saying. One of your posts stated that CPS is destroying your marriage! If all goes as badly as CPS would like to see it go, then the entire fight for YOU to keep him isn't going to work anyway! It sounds like you have other stresses when it comes to Jennifer, more than just her oldest son. You came to this site to help her and her children in the best way you can. Maybe it's time to ask WHY Jennifer can't have her OWN SONS BACK?

From what I remember of your situation, Jennifer didn't do anything to ABUSE her son(s). I think this should be the focus! Fighting CPS and getting those boys back in their MOTHER'S arms. From there, SHE can find programs that will help her oldest son, instead of CPS finding them! The way it SHOULD be! She's going to love him more than anyone and by that fact alone, qualifies her for being able to make the best decisions for her son.

When you go to court (or more specifically, when your step-daughter goes to court) make sure you have EVERYTHING in order. I don't know how they managed to keep this out of court for so long, but surely there's something that can be said about this in court to make them accountable!

I know you said you were having trouble getting the doctor reports, I can only hope that you've managed to obtain some (if not all) of them. Get the dec. of facts filled out if you haven't done that already and try to get witnesses and letters if you can. The more proof you have that Jen is a good mom, the better. Don't forget the COPIES for everyone involved.

Good luck to you!

Chaco
My thought for the day.........

CPS workers are like Slinkies



Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

angeredmom
Posts: 98
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:45 pm
Location: omaha nebraska
Contact:

Postby angeredmom » Fri Oct 21, 2005 3:46 am

i think i maybe missunderstood your prior posts from what you were saying before i took it as you being lost as to his disability and could not handle taking care of him due to that so i was giving you a little information as to some help you could get him i didnt mean to come off as trying to get you to take on a responcibility that you cant sorry if i came off that way wasnt how i was trying to come off i myself have a disabled child so i know the responcibilities involved and it can be tough.

again sorry if i offended you in any way was just trying to help with what little info i do know about.

User avatar
Chaco
Posts: 358
Joined: Sat May 21, 2005 2:15 am
Location: Central California

Postby Chaco » Fri Oct 21, 2005 4:00 am

was just trying to help with what little info i do know about.


I think your post was helpful. Maybe not so much to Cindy, but possibly helpful to another family. Maybe even helpful to Cindy's step-daughter!

Since CPS likes to pick on families that have children with different capabilities, your post could help them. People will pick and choose what's helpful to them. The only thing we can do is offer up things that helped us. :wink:



i told you about my fiance's sisters son and i can tell you with my son i had people coming to my house 3 times a week he had a speech theripist that not only helped me try to get him to talk but taught him sign langauge... he had a physical theripist come to the house to work on his walking and sitting up... and he had a developmental theripist come to the home to help him with his motor skills and comprehension ect...


Chaco
My thought for the day.........

CPS workers are like Slinkies



Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

User avatar
AllForThisSite
Posts: 165
Joined: Tue Aug 02, 2005 11:27 am

Postby AllForThisSite » Fri Oct 21, 2005 4:17 am

I in no way meant to roughen the waters or hurt your feelings in what I posted because I truly see where you are coming from. The main point of my post was that if you could not take on the 5 year old maybe you guys could put your heads together and do some calling around and find out if there is anyone else in the family or friends of the family that might could step in and help so that the child doesn't have to end up in state care.

When children become state owned (the only way I know to put it) the family of that child becomes state owned too. Your grandchild will always have a social worker and every visit and phone call will be preapproved, monitored, supervised, and your involvement with him will be like trying to get a home loan approved; waiting on the red tape to break. It's not like your family will be able to go and see him anytime you want and God only knows what the people paid to take care of him will say about your family.

You have no earthly idea of the problems that can arise from him being in state care. It may be that CPS wants both of your children and the judge grants you custody of the kid you can take. You still go and visit with the other child that is in state care and the caregivers start saying things about you and your other grandchild and CPS refuses you to visit with the child in state care until they can conduct their investigation on the child you have living with you. If CPS removes that child from you too, then what good did it really do you to go to court and pay attorney's to fight for just one when in the end you lost both?

That is why I say it would just serve better for both kids, and you when this goes to court, if you and someone else were willing to fight CPS for BOTH kids and not just you up there by yourself fighting for one kid. You don't want to deal with these people for the rest the years you have left to help raise these children so take someone up to the batting plate with you for this other kid.
P.A.S.S.

Parents Against Social Services

http://144418.aceboard.net/



You can't run with the big dogs if you pee like a puppy!

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Fri Oct 21, 2005 8:18 am

I was not offended by any of you so please dont think that. I just felt like I was not being clear enough, or that few were understanding my delima. If I came off in my last post as being angry, it was probably residual from the days events with the boys mother.

Their mother is one of those very smart people, who lack even an iota of common sense. She is young, but old enough to know better. I finally cornered her with some information I had gathered about some medications the older boy was supposed to be on daily (thyroid). The CW told me that she had not refilled the perscription but one time in a year. Now granted, when she left her abusive husband she had a great deal of medication. Something like 4 bottles of thyroid meds and 2 of cortef. She told me then that the Dr in West virginia allowed her to get all that because she told him she was moving and he wanted to give her time to get a new doctor and all but not run out of meds. She did that once we got here and the new doctor gave her a script which she filled back in feb or march. Now we ALL know that no doctor give a patient a years supply of daily meds. I asked her about that and she told me that she still had some meds left but had not recieved the state medicare cards for Aug and sept. She told me that 3 days ago. it didnt click at the time, but it sure did yesterday.

At intake she told the CW that she had taken the boy to the local public clinic for his spitting up problem. The CW called for records and they werent there. Yesterday I cornered her with the question "If you took (the older boy) to the clinic and your card had not come in, how did you pay for it?" It was then that she told me that she paniced and told the CW that she had taken him, but in reality she had not. Of course my reaction wasnt the best... something along the line of Damn girl how could you be so stupid? To lie on official documents about something so easily confirmed? I told her that she had just destroyed her credability, that in reality she had lost the boys, and that she could face jail time for it. All she could say to me was that she paniced.

So, the way I came off in my post was probably residual from that, and the fact that it is spinning in my head how to save her from what I can only see as being inevitable. However, I still say tht I can't handle both boys, and we know of no one who could take on the older one.
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."

angeredmom
Posts: 98
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:45 pm
Location: omaha nebraska
Contact:

Postby angeredmom » Fri Oct 21, 2005 2:42 pm

ouch im sorry to hear that things are not going that well i hope things DO get better from WHAT i have been reading your daughter i THINK gets one chance after the courts deem so to prove that she can parent them responcibly but god only knows what kinds of plans they will make for that to happen all i can say is that if asked about it in court i would tell the truth and say that she paniced i dont think she can get into legal trouble for lieing unless shes under oath but i DO agree that she will not look very creditable in the courts eyes... hell i have done nothing but tell the truth and and not creditable in the courts eyes so all i can say is and this is from my PERSONAL exsperience is for her to make sure she keeps a copy of EVERYTHING she does and it probably wouldnt hurt for her to go to parenting classes i know boystown does them and if the cercomstances are right they dont charge i know this because i did this volentarily ON MY OWN so that it would make my case look better in the long run... but at this piont if i were her i would be running around setting up appointments such as family counceling there are churches that will do this for free depending on your income and the councelers ARE licenced and i doubt social services will argue with her about family counceling because it would be helping the children... this is how i looked at doing the things i recommended on my own personally... my opinion was the parenting classes might help me with a new view on things... and as for the family counceling? well that was extra time with my kids not to mention it helped them because this ordeal is rough on them they cant come home but thier baby sister is home so it helped in 2 area's there... Boystown is a HUGE orginization and pretty much everystate has a boystown i think and i know theres a 1-800 number for them... i ALSO know they have a hospital and a place where they take care of problem children such as your grandson if i were your daughter i would be checking into this ASAP
i hope any of what i told you helps...

again my heart goes out to your family

User avatar
Chaco
Posts: 358
Joined: Sat May 21, 2005 2:15 am
Location: Central California

Postby Chaco » Fri Oct 21, 2005 5:26 pm

Boystown is a HUGE orginization and pretty much everystate has a boystown i think and i know theres a 1-800 number for them...


Yes, Boystown is HUGE! Did you know that it's actually a "TOWN" though? A small town, but still a town, lol. Funny how something so small can be so huge. :shock:

You got me thinking though. If Father Flannagan can manage to take care of kids without KILLING, ABUSING, MOLESTING AND NEGLECTING them, WHY CAN'T OUR GOVERNMENT??!! You'll notice that father Flannagan's successors aren't SELLING children or going out and forcing their way into people's homes and kidnapping them! Somehow, Boystown has been working for (how long?) like, what? 100 years! Probably not that long, but shoot, a very long time! Although I'm sure they've had a scandal or two, I know I've not heard of any. That doesn't mean it hasn't happened, it just means that I haven't heard of any. How can Boystown manage to hold such high standards and stay so pure in the publics eye, yet our government, with UNLIMITED FUNDS, can't manage to go a SINGLE DAY without destroying someone???!!!

Maybe it's time to take a look at a program THAT WORKS, instead of trying to fix something that's so broken down that throwing it in the DUMP WOULD BE A STEP UP! Just thinking out loud....

Chaco
My thought for the day.........

CPS workers are like Slinkies



Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

angeredmom
Posts: 98
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:45 pm
Location: omaha nebraska
Contact:

Postby angeredmom » Fri Oct 21, 2005 6:04 pm

good questions! not to mention the first people that went up to bat for my fiance and i and STILL do is the people from boystown i wish there was a way to incorporate what they do into a program for CPS... how ever my visitation worker said that in some states they are testing a new program where they place the WHOLE family in a foster home as to NOT break up the family unit and there the parents AND the children get educated... NOW that might be an interesting thing to actually look into and see exactly what they are doing with it

my feeling is this it would be a good step in the right direction i mean atleast if your going to be falsely accused of something your kids wont be torn from you and be used against you like little pawns in a nasty custody game.

User avatar
Dazeemay
Posts: 4135
Joined: Sat Mar 05, 2005 1:07 pm

Postby Dazeemay » Fri Oct 21, 2005 7:22 pm

Chaco,

Look at this and see what happened in Boy's Town.

http://www.vote.org/silence/
**********************************
This is not legal advice;hopefully wisdom

To put it in simple terms…when the authorities ARE the perpetrators and the perpetrators ARE the authorities, there is no earthly justice or recourse, at the end of the day (unless the American people wake up).

Therefore, those who have achieved the highest levels of power seek to ‘enjoy’ the most grievous and extreme injustices. For many of those in the highest circles of power, the greatest statement of power is to perpetrate the greatest possible injustice…the savage, brutal traumatization and abuse of an innocent child.
http://themurkynews.blogspot.com/ MattTwoFour

"Ultimately, the law is only as good as the judge" --- D.X. Yue, 2005, in "law, reason and judicial fraud"
http://www.parentalrightsandjustice.com/index.cgi?ctype=Page;site_id=1;objid=45;curloc=Site:1

angeredmom
Posts: 98
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:45 pm
Location: omaha nebraska
Contact:

Postby angeredmom » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:54 am

wow thanks for the info dazee i live right close to boystown maybe 30 minutes away and never heard a thing about them of course the stuff on the video happened before i moved here but still!
is there anyone out there us parents can trust at this point?

User avatar
Chaco
Posts: 358
Joined: Sat May 21, 2005 2:15 am
Location: Central California

Postby Chaco » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:20 pm

Dazeemay wrote:Chaco,

Look at this and see what happened in Boy's Town.

http://www.vote.org/silence/



Wow Dazee, you have a knack for finding crap, don't you?! :wink:

I never heard anything about that even though I moved away in 1986. You'd think I would have heard SOMETHING! Not a peep though. My entire family is still living there too, sheesh.


It's totally crazy, everything that I read. Blair, Columbus and Omaha are mentioned (in a pretty big way) and most of my relatives are in Omaha, with my mom in Blair and my sister in Columbus. But STILL I heard NOTHING! My brother is a big time Bush hater too, lol. He's always quick to tell me something bad about one of them, lol. Not a word!

I really don't know what to think after reading everything I've read though. I looked up far more than what you posted Dazee. Some of it was just sounding like a crazy person ranting. Kind of like if someone came up to you and said Aliens were living in your hair or something, lol. But John DeCamp is really convincing in what he's saying (as opposed to the people that are attempting to quote him). His articles and parts of his books are really scary if it's true! It's not even ABOUT Boys Town (hey, it's TWO words, lol... I thought it was one word, lol) and that's what's so scary!

Sure, they got a few kids from Boys Town, but that's not what it's about. I don't know if anyone else here read that, or if you've read more than the link you sent Dazee, but if John DeCamp is RIGHT we are all in for the fight of our lives! CPS was "donating" kids too! Kids were being taken off the street for goodness sake!

Who's going to listen to US??? Nobody's left!!! John DeCamp is talking about the FBI, CIA, presidents, ALL politicians, judges, police departments, newspapers, television, and the military for God's sake! I'm serious, WHO'S LEFT TO HELP FIGHT THIS BATTLE?

How can there be so many BAD, HORRIBLE, WICKED people (in power) in this country? Don't anyone say it's our own fault for voting for them either, because I don't vote for child molesters and I don't think ANYONE ELSE purposely votes for them either! It's almost as if CPS is a pawn for these psycho's. They can't do away with CPS, where will they get the children if they do? They are completely sick. I can only pray that John DeCamp is off his rocker and in need of a nut house!

Thanks Dazee, you got me riled up again! :shock:

Don't stop though, I need this extra kick every now and again to keep me focused!

Chaco
My thought for the day.........

CPS workers are like Slinkies



Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

User avatar
Dazeemay
Posts: 4135
Joined: Sat Mar 05, 2005 1:07 pm

Postby Dazeemay » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:29 pm

Cyneca_GSD,

:roll: I did it again Cyneca....got off track sorry for that....should have put it on another thread.
**********************************
This is not legal advice;hopefully wisdom

To put it in simple terms…when the authorities ARE the perpetrators and the perpetrators ARE the authorities, there is no earthly justice or recourse, at the end of the day (unless the American people wake up).

Therefore, those who have achieved the highest levels of power seek to ‘enjoy’ the most grievous and extreme injustices. For many of those in the highest circles of power, the greatest statement of power is to perpetrate the greatest possible injustice…the savage, brutal traumatization and abuse of an innocent child.
http://themurkynews.blogspot.com/ MattTwoFour

"Ultimately, the law is only as good as the judge" --- D.X. Yue, 2005, in "law, reason and judicial fraud"
http://www.parentalrightsandjustice.com/index.cgi?ctype=Page;site_id=1;objid=45;curloc=Site:1

Cyneca_GSD
Posts: 42
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:17 pm
Location: Texas

Postby Cyneca_GSD » Sat Oct 22, 2005 7:21 pm

No problem
Cindy Gialluca



"Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to Hades, while convencing them to ask you for directions."


Return to “CPS Investigations”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests