Out there question

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Marina07
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Joined: Sat Nov 24, 2007 7:24 am

Out there question

Postby Marina07 » Thu Dec 20, 2007 11:54 am

All these people keep telling us that when this is over they will not reunite our family because we have no relation. His kids are his kids, and my daughter is my daughter. They keep saying if we had a child together, then it would be different, because they'd want to keep the siblings together, but since we don't, they will work on keeping the families apart....assuming he is charged with abuse/neglect.

I am curious, what happens if I got pregnant? Then would they have a reason to reunite our families? I definitely can't imagine doing that, unfortunately, otherwise, if it would help our family, I would.....just as someone whose child has leukemia would have a baby for the stem cells, I actually know of a family who did this. But I'm just curious. And why does it seem to me that they are working so hard to keep our family torn apart when we had something so positive and good.

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katgotsteve
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Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:47 am
Location: Georgia

Postby katgotsteve » Fri Dec 21, 2007 7:11 pm

Marina
i feel a desperation in your post. the downside of getting pregnant is that it may bring cps down on you and hurt him worse. it may make the remove your daughter from you. there is no right or wrong conclusion to this story. when this case is over and if yall choose to continue a relationship will be up to yall, unless a judge orders otherwise. right now he is probably just worried about getting out of this mess and getting his own children back. being accused of something so bad can change a man, it is hard for him to trust. right now, i would not worry about the future, only the here and now. that is what will start the healing. if it is meant to be, it will be.

Marina07
Posts: 43
Joined: Sat Nov 24, 2007 7:24 am

Postby Marina07 » Sat Dec 22, 2007 8:57 am

Thanks. I am just so worried, especially what I read here. We thought because they do not have anything on him, that they would drop the charges, but with each court appearance, we are left even more disappointed than the first time.

I just have a bad feeling. And the worst part is, I think my own father may have done something to her, and pinned it on my ex, because he was jealous that my ex was in the process of adopting my daughter. We were actually scheduled to meet with a lawyer and start the adoption process two weeks after the allegations, not to mention, we were starting the process of buying a house, and getting married. Basically, my father is very controlling, and was very threatened by everything going on. Add in the fact that I was pregnant at the time, which means my daughter would then have a half-sibling related to her step-siblings. But once my father found out I was pregnant, he pressured me into having an abortion, by making threats. That's when it occurred to me that maybe this is what he wanted, it wouldn't be the first person whose life he ruined. He couldn't stand that he would no longer be my daughter's father figure, and my daughter was very attached to my ex and her step-siblings. It is weird that my father is calling everyone and telling them how he knew my ex was a child molester, and that he knows he did it, etc.

Momoffor
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Re: Out there question

Postby Momoffor » Sun Dec 23, 2007 11:33 pm

Marina07 wrote:what happens if I got pregnant? if it would help our family, I would.



With what is going on right now, that would be the STUPIDEST thing you could do. You would be showing them that you dont believe your daughter, that you dont mind laying down and making babies with a sexual predator (accused). That you wouldnt stay away from him, just proving CPS case even more that you dont deserve to have your child with you. If she is already with you and you get knocked up by him, that shows them that you had the accused offeneder around your daughter.

Furthermore thats not a reason to bring ANOTHER child into this crazy messed up world.

Not to mention they will be waiting with open arms to rip that child away from you the minute its born.

debbiescalese
Posts: 460
Joined: Thu Jun 28, 2007 4:55 am
Location: WV

Postby debbiescalese » Mon Dec 31, 2007 12:04 pm

Getting pregnant would be a really bad idea right now. It could end up with you losing both kids. A good idea would be to put several states between you and your father and not leave a fowarding address, but wait till the case is closed.

FINN
Posts: 111
Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2005 7:55 pm
Location: Indian

Re: Out there question

Postby FINN » Fri Jan 04, 2008 6:21 pm

Marina07 wrote:All these people keep telling us that when this is over they will not reunite our family because we have no relation. His kids are his kids, and my daughter is my daughter. They keep saying if we had a child together, then it would be different, because they'd want to keep the siblings together, but since we don't, they will work on keeping the families apart....assuming he is charged with abuse/neglect.

I am curious, what happens if I got pregnant? Then would they have a reason to reunite our families? I definitely can't imagine doing that, unfortunately, otherwise, if it would help our family, I would.....just as someone whose child has leukemia would have a baby for the stem cells, I actually know of a family who did this. But I'm just curious. And why does it seem to me that they are working so hard to keep our family torn apart when we had something so positive and good.


Because it's in their nature


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