Our Story

[Eljay]

My husband is looking for a lawyer to sue. They used the words of a mentally deranged individual to traumatize my children.

Well..... it sounds like they did their jobs, exactly what they were supposed to do, and you got a legitimate finding. It didn't go south with a false finding and all the horrible consequences that could have followed. The problem is the false report, the reporter, your daughter. What she did is either her deranged imagination or pure spite. Either way, CPS has to follow protocol and investigate reports, no matter what the source. What they *can* do is give you more credit from the get go IF and ONLY IF you can discredit the report. For example, if you can say that nobody else has been to the home/seen the kids.

When the risk is losing all of your minor children due to the actions of the older child, you're going to have to keep her at arm's length (i.e. only YOU go visit her once a month, or only see her for 1 hour in a public place where she's never alone with the kids).

[rakhel]

i know they were doing their jobs. I'm not as angry now. Still sick, but not as angry.
The SVU is looking to talk to her, and the case worker in charge of our case has stated that she feels that my 19 year old should no longer have sibling visitation(something we were going to ask for anyway). So I see that as a plus on our side, because she is siding with us in this case, that it shouldn't affect the Final discharge request next month.
And having the cops wanting to talk to her may be the thing that she needs to scare her into growing up.

[monkette31]

You might look into Ala-non in order to help you "detach" from this daughter. They will really help you "sort her out"....from what I gather, they are very good with this exact type of subject. It will help you emotionally AND what's better, your other kids will benefit from her potential future allegations = meaning = get her out of your life for sake of your other kids..

One more psycho whacked out referral and your case is certainly up for permanent removal, not joking.

When the case is closed, don't tell them, but MOVE...out of their jurisdiction. The mere number of referrals (anything above 2) will get them permanently taken should you stay and if you have a zombie walking around your life, don't wait for it to happen, cause it will or just don't chance it.

Man, you did real good by not submitting, forcing husband to leave, they would have had you there, would have said you believed abuse occurred because you made father leave.

These are sick nasty people. Please move when this is over....keep daughter out of home.

[rakhel]

WOW it has been a while. But must provide an update and ask for help at the same time.
Agency 1 has been given, by the judge, approval for final discharge and Agency 2 approval for trial discharge. Then all went to hell in a handbasket...well maybe not that bad, but it feels like it.
Son in Agency 2, after 3 successful weekend visits went back to FH with a rash. Not a diaper rash, but one that became so severe that it required oral medication and the promise that it would go away in about 2 months, give or take. So the agency cancelled visits for 2 weeks, until the were sure that hubby and I knew how to administer his medication(Hubby was an EMT, allowed to give patients their own meds, and I was CNA, not allowed to handle meds but allowed to handle salves).
So, okay, we can now have our 1 night a week visits.
On Friday last, we were supposed to have our final discharge meeting with Agency 1. That got cancelled because our case is all sorts of fucked up. In fact it is so screwy I am not even sure I can adequately explain it in type.
Again, court judge gave approval for final and trial discharges. However, now the ACS attorney is telling Agency 1 that they have to wait on Agency 2 to trial discharge so that Agency 1 can monitor agency's 2 charge while he is in our home. Agency 1 is even confused by this, because they want to dicharge their charges.
To make matters more confusing, my lawyer had to ask me who their(foster agencies) lawyer was because the supervisor wasn't giving our lawyers a straight answer as to which ACS lawyer had our case.
Now, this is where I ask for help.
I know there was a class action suit against the city and ACS concerning homeless family and the permanant placement of children back with their family, but I am having trouble locating it.(Yes Agecy 2 is trying to say that Shelter apartments are not adequate as they are not permanant) So if anyone can give my a direction to go in, I would appericate it.

[Eljay]

You mean that CPS can place children in "shelters" (orphanages/group homes/foster homes) but parents CAN'T???? WTF is up with that?? LOL

I know some states have specific legislation stating that poverty/homelessness alone shall NOT be a factor in CPS intervention. Are you sure it was a CLASS action suit? Not a private party suit?

[rakhel]

I found it.
http://www.coalitionforthehomeless.org/ ... to-shelter
and here
http://books.google.com/books?id=Uu6bdp ... es&f=false

This one makes me curious though.
http://www.legal-aid.org/en/lawreform/l ... nvnyc.aspx

[Eljay]

You guys are homeless?

[rakhel]

Had to. We were told it was the only way to get our kids back. They said they would not return our kids that home they were taken from.
But is is kinda nice. There are things I would change if I were paying rent. But I can't look a gifthorse in the month. It's a big two bedroom, with it's own kitchen and bathroom. Sparing hot water and heat. but most of our kids are home with us.

Now agency 2 is trying some bullsh** saying that it's not adequate enough for our children, when agency 1 is happy with it.
By law, NYC has to grant adequate shelter to those families that are deemed homeless.

It's as if they know they have no grounds to keep him and are desperately searching for something, anything, in their attempt to retain control.

[Eljay]

I'm sorry. I hope you get things resolved... it sounds complicated.

[rakhel]

could be worse. They could be attempting a TPR right now.

[rakhel]

First off, seeing as it's been a while. I like what you've done with the site.
second. I apologize for not being around to tell more of this crazy case that is so literally almost over.

Okay update.
over the last few months we have been going crazy trying to figure out what we weren't doing right. While we had the 3 older children home on a trial discharge(for almost 9 months now, but I will discuss that later), we still had our little one in care. He was listed as Medically fragile due to his Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus. Not too long ago, he developed a yeast rash(not too uncommon) and the agency cast the blame our way. Didn't matter that we were only getting him for less that 36 hrs. It had to be our fault. Throw that in with a new(our 3rd) supervisor and new(2nd) director, and you got a recipe for disaster.
The new supervisor decided that since the idea that the rashes were coming from us, she increased the visits to full weekends(friday to monday).
Now since his rashes are now re-occurring, and never showing up in the foster home, it still has to be our fault, and therefore we had to be neglecting his hygiene needs. Then they insisted we keep a daily log, during his visits, of his feeding and changing schedules complete with what he eats and the condition of his butt during every change. All this after then telling us he had sensitive skin and we weren't caring for that properly.
That was when we started taking pictures of the first diaper change after the pickup. Half the time his butt was as rashy as it was on the few occasions when we couldn't control the rash. Only difference between when we him for his visuals and when the foster mother took him was that we weren't hiding the rash under powder.

to be continued...

[rakhel]

Okay. Now fast forward(not too fast) to today. Court!!! hehe.
well, actually, go back a little. the first agency came for a home visit last week and told us,(I paraphrase) "I am tired of waiting on the fucking attorney to make up their damned minds. We have discretion for final discharge so we are having that fuckng meeting."

Okay now to today.
We all got to court, and already something is off. We already knew about the new(#7) ACS attorney,which I have been told is unusual, in and of itself, but that wasn't it. "It" came later. While sitting in the waiting room waiting to be called, we speak to our attorneys and have a small conversation with the kids' attorney(who saw her clients happy and healthy after been stuck in traffic for 3 hours two weeks prior.) about her clients and, believe it or don't, her son. We tell her that what the rash looks like his brother's before he was diagnosed with GERD but the agency is even entertaining the idea of a cause. It's easier to blame the parents.
No one is buying the fact, with the small exception of agency 2 and the new ACS attorney, that these rashes are only occurring during the weekend and magically clear up during the week.

Then we get called. HEHEHEHEHE( you see where this is going, don't you?)
The new lawyer doesn't want final discharge for the older three because the baby is still in care(keep in mind, A2 was refusing to trial until A1 went to final. I know, I know )Judge was tired. She's our 3rd referee, and has already seen 3 ACS attorneys since she took over our case. Judge said, "Kids are discharged."
ACS attorney, "I would like a hearing."
Judge, "Okay call your first witness."
ACS, "Well....I need an adjournment. My first witness isn't here."
Judge, "If you weren't ready for a hearing, why do you want one?"
And it just went downhill from there. ACS lawyer got chewed up and spit out. A2 got stomped on a few times.
And we still got our final discharge. For the older 3.

[rakhel]

So by the time the hearing was over("If you object to my ruling, you know how to file an appeal."), the ACS attorney was looking like Linda Blair in The Exorcist. Smoke out of the ears, green foaming mouth, spinning head. you name it.
They want a medical clearance for the baby. We convinced, well hubby convinced, the baby's nurse with the agency, to let us make the appointments for the dermat...oh wait I forgot that part.
A2's caseworker admitting to something in court that would have been held against us. When the baby developed a yeast rash(which is what I thought that nasty rash was in the first place), they took him to a dermatologist. The doc gave him medicine and told them to make a follow up appointment. They gave him the meds, but when it came time for the follow-up the agency, or I should say his caseworker, decided that he didn't need to follow-up because the rash was going.
Then there was the "log" business. My attorney asked if the foster mother was being asked to keep a similar log. She replied no because the foster mother tells her about his day and what she feeds him and what-not. My lawyer then asked "wouldn't it make more sense to ask both sets of parents to keep logs that way you can compare the two?" "Not in my opinion," she says.

Sorry there was just so much fun and under the bus throwing that it is hard to remember it all in order.

But anyway, we have final discharge on the older 3. The baby won't be trialed("Sooner rather than later,' says madam judge) until he gets medical clearance. We are not waiting on them to make the appointments(it'll never happen). So once we get the clearances he will be home. We are hoping by late July because he has a neurology appointment in the middle of the month.


YAYAYAYAY US!!!!!

[family_man]

Such wonderful news!!! I'm so happy for you.

[rakhel]

Thanks, Family man.
We received a call from A1. Our Final Team Conference is scheduled for July 8. We are thrilled. No more Open ACS case with them.
The final child...his agency is now being funny. Since we have to do visuals due to a re-occurring diaper rash that they tried to claim only happened in our home, the caseworker is expected to be there, especially with this particular agency. However, since court, monday, we have not heard from her or seen her. The only way we found out what time we were supposed to be at the agency for the weekend pickup was because the foster mother called us.

I'm not upset or anything. I just find it slightly odd.

[rakhel]

we are on trial discharge with the youngest. FINALLY!!!!!
I think the agency is afraid of the judge. HEHE.
We also managed to get them down to a time frame for the TD.
3 months. If things go well(which it will) they will patition the court for final, regardless of what the ACS lawyer wants.
And even if the judge wants additional months, the agency said they would follow us to wherever we wanted to go for however long the trial discharge has to go on.
We basically had to tell the agency infront of the ACS facilitator that we were tired of being homeless and that the only reason we were homeless was because of the case and our not willing to leave the state without our kids. We told them there are places we can afford right now, however, none are in NYC, and that even the kids want to move to somewhere more rural.
(They want a back yard and a dog to play with. Who can object to that?)
Our plan is to move somewhere upstate, if the case is still open, because hubby doesn't want them to involve another state in our lives. I agree. However, if they close the case in Nov., we are gone. Leaving the state. We are leaving NYC either way after the next sememster ends.

[rakhel]

I am pissed.
The foster agency removed my youngest son because he had dirty feet.
Well, they also complained that he had access to roach spray(which is silly becuase number one, I don't have roach spray; number two, the other kids don't have access to anything chemical related so why would he?), the condition of my home(My living room was a mess because I was going through boxes ) and that supposedly my husband threatened to kill someone(he did threaten to kill the driver of the van that hit my oldest two days ago. She's just banged up, thankfully).
Then Emergency CPS showed up. House was spotless. Then we went into a tirade about what we were allowed to do and weren't.
One of the conditions of his release was that we continue to take him to their doctors. They have a clinic within their office. FIne. Yet they refused to entertain any suggestion as to what is causing his chronic diaper rash. He is showing symptoms of what his older brother had. bowel movement causes diaper rash. care for it for a few days. It goes away only to show up a week later. cycle continues. the older boy was diagnosed with GERD. medicine fixed the problem no more rashes. We made the suggestion to the clinic's doctors and they poo-pooed it, literally.
The baby now has sores on both his pinky toes and has excessive thirst. We asked that he be checked for diabetes. "We only do that every 6 months.
ACS says this is not normal
We asked for therapy referals. They haded us a list and said look yourself.ACS says they are required to refer us and that wasn't a referal.
We asked for homemaker services. They stalled on that.
We told them we needed our CPR renewed. haven't heard squat.
Now we may have to go to a new court for this mess becuase they couldn't follow their own three month plan.
WE have a new ACS caseworker, possibly a new court case, on top of the original.
THey asked if we were overwelhmed. We informed them thatif our seconded oldest had been here, we would have been. Her mental issues would have cuased us to go mental ourselves.
Were we ever diagnosed with any mental issues. Yes, Ajustment Disorder was diagnosed to continue therapy to appease the agencies.
My lawyer says that this doesn't make sense. THat this is all crazy. Especially since they waitedi until the end of the business day and week to do this. no one can find out anything until Monday.
The one good thing is that ACS didn't leave with my other kids. THey didn't like the condition's we coulldn't control. Roaches and mice and missing screnes on the window, but these are things that are beyond our control. We are in a homeless shelter, after all, and those problems lay solely at the feet of the people operating our shelter. Otherwise, they found no issues with our housekeeping( We didn't have a lot of food, but it was enough to satisfy them. We didn't have sheets on half the beds, but our explanation satisfied them.
They actually left giving us advise as to how to get out of this mess and as confused as my lawyer is.

[LindaJM]

I am so sorry to hear this, Rakhel... did you find out anything more today? Will you be going back to court. I trust that you have a good lawyer.

Did you tell them your plan to move out of state? I'm wondering if they did this intentionally so they could force you to stay in their area.

[rakhel]

I am so sorry to hear this, Rakhel... did you find out anything more today? Will you be going back to court. I trust that you have a good lawyer.

Did you tell them your plan to move out of state? I'm wondering if they did this intentionally so they could force you to stay in their area.

Sorry it's been awhile, Linda. Lost internet for a while.
We had to go back down to two hour visits and work our way back up. Now we are back to 8 hr day visits.
We have had court twice since that day and both times were interesting.
The first hearing had the referee in a room she wasn't happy with and a bunch of documents she wanted time to read, so she posponed the permanancy hearing until Dec. That hearing I can't report too much on as neither I nor my husband were in the room. We, and the caseworker, got tossed out. Not for anything we did, but for what the ACS attorney was pulling.

She was attempting to extend the case by handing out documents the minute court started, instead of before. This did not please the judge, because this forced a cursury look at documents and allowed for questions to be asked without proper preperation. So when the GAL asked a question concerning what my husband had said after our daughter's accident, all hell broke loose.
WE only found out later that the ACS attorney not only got yelled at for unacceptable work habits but that ACS had lost reasonable efforts. Which we were told was significant.

we go back on Tuesday.

This hearing should be just as interesting.
We have been told that in order to get our son back we must have homemaker services. In order to get homemaker services, we must get a form(Mq-11) filled out by a doctor. We cannot not seem to get these papers filled out.
The first set, we took to our psychologist who said that he wasn't willing to fill them out because we are not disabled, and by filling them out he said he would be committing meicaid fraud.
The agency, after loosing reasonable efforts, said that they would take our physicals and our psych eval, that they obtained after convincing us to have an indipendant eval, and send all that to ACS. ACS told them that that was unacceptable and to have us fill out the papers for the two that have autism.
(A win-win for us at this point.
Pediatrician fills out form, we get homemaker service, son comes home.
She doesn't fill out form, agency is asking for something we can't get, son comes home)
Well... guess what....
She refused. Said that those papers must be filled out by a psychologist(see above).

Happy fun time had by all.

Well most.

So what happens if ACS looses reasonable efforts twice in a row?

[rakhel]

Court was posponed again because on of the lawyers couldn't get to court, which is understandable. It was snowing pretty bad.
And we got a new referee. Fun. Fun.

[LindaJM]

I hope the new referee will be willing to hear your side of the story!