False accusation

[bobstower]

My wife and I have 2 lovely daughters age 1 and 5. We had a policeman come by the house explaining somebody reported us to CPS. After our initial shock and looking for the hidden cameras thinking this must be some kind of cruel joke. We started to discuss this with the officer.

The complaint said I came home drunk yelled at my wife to get in the house and threatened to drag her by the hair if she did not comply. Then they heard my wife yelling "no stop, no stop, after we went in the house".

The story is a complete fabrication and the police were never called and 2 days later a report and call was filed with CPS because the complainant is concerned about mental abuse of the children. We were not even home of at the time of the situation alledgedly took place. Let alone the fact we are a model family and have zero tolerance for any violence verbal or otherwise i our house.

I let the nice officer in at 8:30 pm to inspect my immaculately clean house and see my 2 sleeping children sound in their beds. He separately asked my wife and I questions, and of course our stories were exactly the same. The truth.

The office was nice and even joked with us that everything was ok and the complaint is out of character to what he was witnessing in a surprise visit. He also added that someone from CPS would visit us, the complaint was anonymous, and he has seen lots of false allegations over the years. And tried to give us as much info as possible.

The caller was anonymous and we are quite worried who would say something like this. We have an idea about who might of done this horrible thing and she is an unstable parent at my daughters school who the principal has issued a warning about. She had got mad at my wife a week previous over a charitable event my wife volunteered to run at the school felt. She was not included in on the Principals advice, blamed my wife and even followed her all the way to our house one day as my wife was walking my daughter home. That said we can not be 100% sure it is her. My wife asked all the neighbors if they heard or saw anything that may have been misinterpreted, and they all jumped to our defense about what a wonderful family we are and told us tell anyone who shows up to come and talk to them. They were genuinely angry this was happening to us.

How do I protect my family from a person who is falsely accusing my wonderful family and me of these problems? We work so hard to be model parents and have devoted all our time and money to our children and their well being. We wonder whats next and what somebody like this, with no conscience, might do next.

2 days later a CPS Social worker came to our house inspected it, talked to my wife and I, together and seperately. Then asked to speak to my 5 year old which we said was fine. We find out later he asked all kinds of questions about if Mom and Dad ever fight, drink, and how we punish the kids if they do something wrong. I am not worried about her answers, because we have nothing to hide but found this very inappropriate under the circumstances for a stranger to be asking a 5 year old girl. All night she was asking questions why this person was asking her these questions. She is very smart and curious.

The CPS rep also told us he has no real information about the the person who filed the complaint and this happens all the time. I was surprised to find out they do not follow up with the person complaining only us. I strongly feel someone making an allegation against a family should at least be questioned or followed up with. Anyone could do this to anyone at anytime for any reason with no consequences. This is a flimsy complaint under any circumstances. Unbelievable!

They also will call my daughters school, and our kids pediatrician. He spoke to 2 of our neighbors on his way out who confirmed our facts about the incident and gave us lovely references.

Since Alcohol was supposed to be involved they asked us if we would take a drug test. lol...Which we will do today just to close this case as soon as possible.

I am a hard working professional CFO for a large corporation and my wife a certified teacher who is staying at home since she got pregnant with our 1 year old daughter, just to give the best care possible to our children. I am simply gutted and can not believe this nightmare could be happening to us. We rarely even have a drink and I dedicate my life to providing the most wonderful protective atmosphere possible for my family. All our friends and family consider us role models and we provide help to anyone who needs it. This is just so unfair I can barely even sleep more than an hour at a time this week.

I feel like I am in Nazi Germany and really wonder how this could happen without even investigating the reported false incident which could have been disproved by my absence from the home, sobriety, and asking neighbors about the allegations. If someone with a claim like this called the police all this could have been resolved. Instead they CPS 2 days after the alleged incident. Where is the common sense here.

Do I have any rights here? because it sure doesn't feel like it.

All opinions and comments are welcome as maybe it can help my wife and I cope just a little better with what is happening.

Thanks for reading.

Bob

[perfectly_flawed]

Rule #1 in dealing with CPS is to never, ever allow them to speak to a child alone. They're well known for taking innocent comments out of context and twisting them to make it seem like the child is living in a nightmare.
Rule #2 is to have a lawyer on record and to refer them to that lawyer with all contact.

These 2 things will help protect your family from their twisting facts into lies and trying to take your children or drag you through their system for years.

[Daruma]

Yes, any random stranger can say anything at all about you to CPS, and you will be the one under suspicion. They give the benefit of the doubt to the accuser, for the sake of "protecting" the child. Better safe than sorry, is their thinking. The problem is that children are not necessarily safer in CPS care. Sometimes kids are removed from a safe, loving home and placed into a much worse one. At best, when the children only spend a short time in foster care and the foster parents are good, the children are still frightened and confused. Many blame themselves. They figure they must have done something very bad in order to be sent away to strangers.

I would strongly suggest you get an attorney NOW. Don't just hope that this will all go away by itself. Do not sign anything (especially not an agreement for "services") until you get an attorney and you've familiarized yourself with some of the material on this website. Be ready for a court trial if it comes to that. I haven't been through this myself (it was my adult son who was accused) but the consensus of those who have is, if they don't close your case, then go to trial instead of taking a plea. A trial is the only place where CPS will be forced to prove their case.

Since you and your wife seem to be reasonably well off, and since you apparently live in a nice neighborhood, I'm hoping your case will be closed soon for lack of evidence. If you were poor, CPS would probably be much quicker to remove your children and place them into the foster/adoption pool. Rich or poor, you aren't alone in being falsely accused. The more you learn about CPS, the more appalled you're going to be.

You and your wife are probably in shock right now. Dealing with CPS is almost like being physically assaulted. Take good physical care of yourselves right now. Get enough rest, eat right, and gather your friends & extended family around you for support. Stay strong for your kids' sake.

I sincerely wish you all the best, along with a speedy closure for your case.

[MaggieC]

From what I read of your post, the police may be your best friends here as they investigated a clean house.

The police are not the enemy in my opinion as they do work within the bounds of evidence and checks and balances.

CPS is another story.

As you have mentioned that you are a CEO of a company, I gather that you might have the means to retain private counsel. Please do so at once.

I realize that you might think the fees are unwarranted but what few monies you spend today may save you thousands tomorrow.

It is important, again in my humble opinion, to nip these items in the bud as soon as possible and with capable legal counsel you might be able to do same.

Be certain to obtain the police report written by the officers who first came to your home. Keep all records and a journal and hire an attorney now.

Godspeed to you

[falselyaccused2010]

Aside from hiring a competent attorney who is an expert (and not afraid) in dealing with DHHS, I suggest you record record record all future correspondences with them. After contact, write a formal letter outlining the gist of the contact, and send via certified mail (if by then you already have a lawyer, send a copy to your lawyer). (I myself have been transcribing such recordings, and have them notarized and provide copies to my lawyer.)

Since your wife is a SHAM who is highly educated, ask her to research more on cases against DHHS and arm herself with knowledge (and pass it on to you). You two are your best advocates.

Predict what DHHS would want you to do so they could close the case, and be proactive. If you can do it yourself before DHHS would want it, do so and do not wait for them to refer you somewhere for such (example, drug test -- ask your physician for that; don't let DHHS caseworker do it or refer you to some unfamiliar clinic). Somebody accused that your children are mentally abused -- gather school records, and even schedule them for a psych eval of your own choosing (ask your pedia to refer you to a child psychology expert to assess psychosocial development). Compile photos of activities the children take part in -- sports, music, etc. that shows how well-rounded they are; videos of normal childhood behavior (e.g., loving to pets, etc. in contrast to destructive/hurtful behavior).

In my state there is also a Children's Ombudsman who welcome complaints against DHHS. I am right now in that process, especially after documents gathered that involve psych eval, family therapy notes, school records, etc. are indicative that if DHHS will continue preventing my children from having an intact family, that puts my children at risk of developing future behavioral problems brought on by DHHS intervention.

DHHS cannot force you to undergo assessments and tests, but they will use your children as leverage. Never sign any release of information, even if you think you got nothing to hide. You MUST exercise your constitutional rights, and let them CPS workers know that you know your constitutional rights. You even have the right to record the interviews. That is something you should have prepared for right after the police told you CPS was coming.

[bobstower]

Wow, thanks for all the advice. This is really a crazy system that I have never had exposure to so I really appreciate the comments.

At this point I have no choice, but to wait and see if they close the case since nothing has happened since my last post. The social worker said this will most likely be closed, but does not help with the stress level of it all. I will retain a lawyer if it is not closed ASAP.

By being naive, honest and trying to be helpful seems I may have made some mistakes already.

I also find it comforting and sad that I might be in a better position because as Daruma said we are well off. Economic status has nothing to do with loving and caring for a child. We never had money when I was a kid, but my parents did a fabulous job and any child could only hope to have such a great childhood.

Thanks again and I will keep you posted.

[bobstower]

I would like to report a happy ending for our family...our case was closed and we received a letter saying the investigation proved the claims were unfounded. We also got a call of sympathy and regret we had to go through this from the social worker.

We found out through the Principal at my daughters school that the woman we suspected of making the call was under investigation herself for falsely reporting a little league commissioner of abusing kids. The Principal and our pediatrician were awesome and went beyond the call of duty to clear our name. My wife found out from other mothers at the school this woman had been making all kinds of accusations, threats, and comments to other parents.

This false accuser had already been removed from another school in the district for numerous incidents at the school.

A week after the accusation against us and 3 days after the accusation against the little league commissioner she withdrew her kids from school and nobody has been able to contact her. I think she needs mental help and pray she does not continue her ways.

It is really sad that someone like this can put good families in situations like this by making an anonymous phone call. There has to be some accountability for accusations of this magnitude.

Thank you for anyone who offered advice and I sympathize and would love to help anyone who may be in a similar situation.

We have a system that is broken and should not exist in America and I am going to start talking to anyone I can to help reform it.

[Daruma]

Congratulations on getting your case closed! It's encouraging to hear of a happy ending.

I hope the accuser gets help. She sounds dangerous and unstable. The irony is, if anyone's kids need rescuing, it's probably the accuser's kids. (Not that I'd wish anyone's kids to go through the trauma of removal or foster care.)

If enough of us speak out about CPS, we can begin to see some change. Laws don't get changed until people start getting vocal.

[mfleon]

Just to let you know i am thankful that your case was closed but, just be aware that if anyone ever contacts cws again they will use this case against you i myself have been a mother now for 20 yrs and have cases from my crazy mother i have 17 old cases from 11 yrs ago and i just tried getting guardianship of my 2 year old grandson and cws came and removed him from my home after the family court turned it over to cws my grandson is now staying with an uncle and aunt and i'm waiting on a response to see if i guess a higher worker will let me be accepted to have my grandson with me for the time hopefully he is either returned to my daughter or maybe just leave him here with me . don't get me wrong not trying to make you feel unhappy but just know the downfall its really sad when other people have no life and try to ruin others and its the children that suffer in the whole game that people play........

[monkette31]

Also, as one last note, you need to get your name off the child abuse registry in your state. Because you have had an allegation made, your name is in a child abuse registry and should you be needed in the future to take custody of your children's children or your family's children, being on the registry (due to the allegation) will prevent this from happening. Get your name off of the registry.

[mfleon]

how can i get my name cleared from the registry

[MaggieC]

You will need to write to your state's capitol's home office of CPS. You will need to get your files and research the laws within the state in which you seek to have your name cleared.

In some states, it is routine, it others, it might be impossible.

But for now, get your records, and research your state's laws and work from there.