What Helped us

Share news of your success stories and methods for victory to inspire those who come after you here.

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rakhel
Posts: 135
Joined: Fri Apr 02, 2010 10:18 am

What Helped us

Postby rakhel » Sat Aug 25, 2012 12:38 pm

Thanks to all that have responded and listened to the rantings and ravings of a mad momma, even though I haven't been on in ages.
This is just a few tips I learned along the way.


I made a mistake when this all started.I what I was told when I signed that stupid paper giving the state temporary custody.

So if I were to advise anyone on how to handle CPS, my first piece would be to not believe everything you are told.

When CPS says they just want to talk to you, know you do have the right to remain silent. What you say can be used against you.

Know your "tells." In other words, if you said too much in the first place, know what to say in the second so they can't tell which truth is the truth.

DO NOT sign a blank medical release form. You sign it, you will be giving them too much information about yourself.

If you have to scream at the person standing in front of you, be quick to apologize and explain that you are extremely frustrated by the system you are fighting. 9 times out of tem, you will be screaming at a person who does understand. It's that one you have to watch out for.

TAKE PICTURES. If you know they are coming by, take pictures that are time/date stamped, before the CW arrives. If your lawyer has email, sent the pics to him/her before the CW arrives. That way when she says "I came by at ____ and the place was a disaster," you can point to your pictures and ask how?

If you have to deal with two agencies, like we had, work them against each other. IF you have to get CPS involved(We did this too)

If they accuse you of some type of neglect, such as medical, follow them up on it. If they are neglecting your children, remind them why they took your kids in the first place. My oldest came down with TB while in FC. When we found out her medical needs were being neglected by the agency, we called CPS on them.

Tell them straight off that TPR(Termination of Parental Rights) is not an option. You will be getting your kids back. Keep reminding them of this.

Know the chain of command and be ready to climb. know your caseworker's supervisor, the supervisor's director, the office director, any secretary working with any of these people(secretaries have the ears of their bosses)

If you have a service plan, don't fight it, but don't wait on them to either. The parenting class they had set up for us was 2 months down the road. I found one that started immediately. We were half way through the class when theirs called us. Further, if you feel there are services that they offer that you feel could benefit you, ask for them. It throws them off

IF you have an 18b(court appointed) lawyer and you don't feel he is representing you as you feel he should, you can request a new one.

This one is from my therapist.
When the court orders a psychiatric mental evaluation, bring all answers to their questions back to the kids.
Q. What makes you happy? A. Spending what little time I have with my kids. Q. What makes you angry? Hearing my child cry and not being there to comfort them. Q. What scares you? A. watching them grow up without you....
Stuff like that

IF something isn't getting done, like a court order, remind your lawyer. He will remind the ACS lawyer

Know the laws of your state regarding video/audio taping.

Most importantly, never give up.

I may have more but that is all I can think of right now.
I did not give birth to my children just so someone else could raise them!!!

User avatar
Eljay
Posts: 2645
Joined: Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:01 am

Re: What Helped us

Postby Eljay » Sat Aug 25, 2012 8:14 pm

Great tips. Thank you! It's always good to learn from someone who has been through the system. :)
Advice & opinions provided are no substitute for genuine legal assistance. Laws & rules vary by state/jurisdiction so do your homework and get
an education in CPS laws, rules & practices so that you can FIGHT for your children's rights. I am not a lawyer. Your mileage may vary.

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christine4
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Aug 23, 2014 10:41 pm

Re: What Helped us

Postby christine4 » Sun Oct 05, 2014 3:15 pm

Thank you for the advice me and my husband are fighting hard and are thankfull for Thos site and any tips we get on here


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