My kids are in a gay foster home. organizing a protest

[Greegor]

What are the limits to Police verbal no contact orders?
They do that sort of stuff all the time to solve problems
but it's not exactly comparable to a court order.

[donita]

Tp whom I May Concern

This is to state that I have been advisd that M and H are being returned to my physical custody but that I understand that legal custody still resides with the Department of Children's Servises. I also understand that there is a No Contact Order with respect to my husband, S, and my granddaughter, H. This order will be filed in Juvenile Court within the next two days but will be effective as of today's date. I also understand that should this No Contact Order be violated, today or any day hereafter, the penalty is one year imprisonment for each violation. The No Contact Order is pending further orders of the court.
__________________

I didn't actualy write this, cps wrote it for me. If I signed I could take my kids home.

This can't be right

[Frustrated]

Can you check to make sure it was indeed filed in Juvy Court? Can you go to Court and find out if the No contact order was indeed filed? Sometimes their hearsay and doing it are completely different things.

Sometimes I wish having this matter in Civil Court, rather than Juvy Courts, because Juvy Courts are biased and most Judges there are rubberstampers to CPS. If you file against the No Contact Order in COURT, some Judges will not sign it...they would want to hear why no contact? That is WHY the CPS stayed away from Courts and HAD YOU SIGN THE LETTER INSTEAD! CPS has gotten away with it. If you had it in Court, maybe the Judge won't agree with it, or maybe so. You just don't know unless you were there. But with CPS People, they always arm twist people into things that they don't want to do? That is called extortion.

[tiredofthis]

I think parents need to be able to have their children removed from a gay/lesbian home if they so desire it. How dare CPS expose any children to a lifestyle that is totally unacceptable to the bio family. I have STRONG religious convictions that tell me that it is a sin, no I would never tell someon they are horrible people for being gay. They can love whomever they choose, but as a parent I am not going to raise my kiddos to think homosexuality is an everyday, normal lifestyle and that it is ok. Now if they end up gay/lesbian I'll love them to death, but exposing them to this at a young age is wrong. They are my children to teach my values, not CPS's and if I ever had to have my kids adopted out I would bend over holy hell backward to stop a gay couple from getting my kids. That is ridiculous there are plenty of parents who wouldn't care place their children in that home, but not mine.

[Marina]

In the news

Foster Care Changes
8/4/06

http://www.kolr10.com/news/default.asp? ... ws&id=5997

The Department of Social Services wants to know your sexual orientation. Remember, a judge in Kansas City ruled the state could no longer automatically prevent homosexuals from becoming foster parents...

The department says it will continue to consider a foster family`s cultural background before placing children with them, and that`s the reason for needing to know a person`s sexual orientation...

we always try to give the parent a voice...

there have been a few gay people in the area who have now asked to become foster parents.

[Marina]

Links to court cases involving Termination of Parental Rights because parent was gay.

http://forum.fightcps.com/viewtopic.php?t=4870

[donita]

Through all generations, natural evolution has denied homosexuals the ability to procreate. It is reasonable to argue that society does not have the right to legislate children into the care of homosexual environments. Every child is born from a heterosexual relationship in some form.

Consenting adults involved in an incestuous relation is still an imprisonable offense, even though it is occationally a sexual preference between consenting adults. Nature dictates that incestuous procreation poses high risks to the offspring through probable birth defects. It is reasonable for society to outlaw such social behavior in order to protect people from behavior which weakens that society.

Nature dictates that homosexuals not procreate at all. In no way, shape, form, or fashoin can homosexuals produce offspring with each other. Is it reasonable then, to legislate children to them? If nature denies them children on the whole are we as a society wiser than natural evolution?

Nature sets its own limits on sexual behavior. Permiscuous sexuality is often accompanied with disease. Incest produces probable birth defects. However, homosexuality produces no offspring at all.

There are some who will elevate homosexuality as above nature simply because thier childless sexual behavior does not seem to pose a threat to society, yet many of our most deadly diseases are easily transmitted through thier practices.

Finally nature dictates that like things produce like things. An apple tree can only produce an apple, and an orange an orange, a walnut a walnut. A dog can only produce a dog, a cat a cat, a human a human. It is quit arguable that nature could not possibly have produced a homosexual as they have never had the ability to produce offspring with each other.

[lynn5067]

WOW THAT WAS DEEP
i see and agree with your point
glad to see you are still here

[Shirley]

Through all generations, natural evolution has denied homosexuals the ability to procreate. It is reasonable to argue that society does not have the right to legislate children into the care of homosexual environments. Every child is born from a heterosexual relationship in some form.

Consenting adults involved in an incestuous relation is still an imprisonable offense, even though it is occationally a sexual preference between consenting adults. Nature dictates that incestuous procreation poses high risks to the offspring through probable birth defects. It is reasonable for society to outlaw such social behavior in order to protect people from behavior which weakens that society.

I couldn't find any information that says incest between consenting adults is punishable by imprisonment, or even any that anyone had ever been prosecuted for such.

Nature dictates that homosexuals not procreate at all. In no way, shape, form, or fashoin can homosexuals produce offspring with each other. Is it reasonable then, to legislate children to them? If nature denies them children on the whole are we as a society wiser than natural evolution?

There are many couples who are unable to procreate, for various reasons. Therefore, nature is saying they should not be together, and have a loving relationship.

Nature sets its own limits on sexual behavior. Permiscuous sexuality is often accompanied with disease. Incest produces probable birth defects. However, homosexuality produces no offspring at all.

If producing birth defects is an issue, anyone who has any genetic defect should NOT procreate. Everyone should be tested first to make sure only perfect people are produced.
Disease does not discriminate. Homosexuals produce no more diseases than heterosexuals.

There are some who will elevate homosexuality as above nature simply because thier childless sexual behavior does not seem to pose a threat to society, yet many of our most deadly diseases are easily transmitted through thier practices.

Finally nature dictates that like things produce like things. An apple tree can only produce an apple, and an orange an orange, a walnut a walnut. A dog can only produce a dog, a cat a cat, a human a human. It is quit arguable that nature could not possibly have produced a homosexual as they have never had the ability to produce offspring with each other.

Being exposed to "gayness" does not produce gayness anymore than being exposed to heteros produces heteros.

I, personally understand not wanting your children taught values that you, yourself do not hold. I would hate for my children to be taught fundamentalist Christian values..to believe in a wrathful "God" who I do not believe exists.

If my child HAD to be placed in a foster home, I would choose, in the following order: gay, pagan, wiccan, atheist.

[donita]

Marina provided a link a few frames up, citing a case of a man and his sister with two children who was sentence to 7 years imprisonment for incest.

I am speaking catagoricaly when it comes to evolution being the denier of homosexual procreation. I know that there has been homosexuals for thousands of years and there will always be homosexuals. I personally find it hard not to like homosexuals as the the ones I know seem child like in alot of ways. Being mean to a homosexual feels like being mean to a puppy. However, I honestly fear that it is a mistake to ingnore the fact that for some reason, nature denies homosexuals the ability to produce children with each other. I think it is wrong to expect society to provide homosexuals the right to claim someone elses child without the childs parents consent.

I disagree with the idea that exposing children to "gayness" doesn't affect them. Children are master imitators of their environment.

I could never accept my children being placed in a lesbian or gay home. There is only one other situation that would flip me out more, that I can think of, and that would be if cps placed them in a wiccan home.

I know that you disagree with me, and I respect that. I have no anamosity toward you and I also understand that it is important for you to post your point of view since I am so direct with mine. I respect that too. but I am not going to change my mind and I am not going to stop fighting for the right to keep children from being placed in same sex homes.

There is no way for this not to feel like a personal attack as much as I would like to be on the same side. I think though that we can agree that bio parents should have a say in what type of home they are placed in.

[mrbeansmom]

I totally agree that you should have a say in regards to whether or not you want your child placed in a heterosexual or homosexual foster home. It amazes me that anyone wouldn't be given that choice when we, as foster parents, are not allowed to cut hair or take foster children to our churches if they are of a different faith than ours. A foster mom and dad versus a foster dad and dad, or mom and mom, is BIG! How dare they take that right from a parent...........

[Marina]

Issue of gays can be a religious issue?

www.bpnews.net/storydownload.asp?ID=11420

Religious views of social worker upheld in federal court ruling

By Gene Kapp

Jul 30, 2001

ST. LOUIS (BP)--A federal appeals court has upheld a lower court ruling that the state of Missouri was wrong when it sought to fire a social worker whose deeply held religious beliefs prompted him to object to the state licensing homosexual foster parents.

[donita]

The lesbian foster home that my daughter was placed in had conversations about the size of the sex change operation that one of them had, which she had done to make the other happy. They talked about what a big deal it was for the feminine partner to get to pick out the size she wanted.

My daughter felt like the masculine partner was watching her all of the time.

My unsupporvised visits were cut off because I have a problem with lesbian foster homes.

My daughter was 17 and not allowed to leave the yard without one of them with her. In effect they were cut off from all other influence but thiers for the sake of protecting (promoting) thier own lifestyle.

cw didn't even know the foster parents were gay until she dropped of my daughter and granddaughter because the state is not allowed to ask foster parents about thier sexual orientation when they apply.

[rlfroo]

From a FP perspective:
Where I am from parents have a right to not have their child placed in a "gay" home. They do have to fight to get the children transferred to another home though. We are required as Foster Parents to respect the beliefs of the birth family. Not all do, but it is actually a requirement. If a child is a Christian and you are not and that child wants to participate in Christian activities it is our duty to facilitate that. If a child's family are vegetarians, we are required to follow through with that. We as foster parents are not allowed to get a child baptized, get their hair cut (without signed consent), if they don't want to go to church we can not make them to, if they don't want to go on a visit we can't make them, If they don't want to eat a certain food, we can't make them. These are a few of the rules where I am from, I follow them, others should follow them. But you need to know that you as parents have those rights if you don't want your child in a "gay" home speak up. If you have special religious needs speak up. But do be reasonable.

[Marina]

http://www.cwla.org/childwelfare/fg09.p ... 2rights%22

Child Welfare League
Summary of Your Rights
and Responsibilities as a
Parent Involved with the
Child Welfare System

page 3
What are my rights related to out-of-home placement?

• be consulted and make decisions about things such as your child’s religion,
health care, and education

[Frustrated]

Sadly, I have heard Foster Children's hair was cut without the permission of a Birth Parent. this is what I hear most often.

What I don't hear often was the Muslim Families being put in Foster Care. This much I don't hear and most Case workers leave them alone because of this special religion infringement. I was told that my Friend was a Muslim and the Case worker told her that they can't remove her based on Sexual Abuse because her Parents were Muslim and Christian! and Yet they were left alone.

"I can't do anything" said the Case worker.

Why?

Because the Parent was a Muslim.

That's why.

I was so suprised when I hear this and I don't hear any Muslim Children being placed in Foster Care that much, just too many blond haired,blue eyes and black children out there were placed there instead. Mostly drug and alcohol related. Most 536,000 Foster Children in USA alone were blond haired, blue eyes, and black children being put up for Adoptions.

[donita]

My daughter was placed on birthcontrol at the age of 13 against my will. The most imput that I was allowed was to accompany my daughter to the doctor to discuss the type of birthcontrol. I actually sat in front of the cps doctor and said, "I do not want my 13 year old on any birthcontrol." My daughter wanted birthcontrol because she was afraid she would be raped again while in states care. However, I do not think a 13 yr old's body has hormonally balance from entering puberty at the age of 13 and I truely believe that it could actually do her harm to put those kinds of hormones in her still developing body.

the last foster mom colored my daughters hair herself with a home hair color which changed her from brunete to an orangy blonde. I was so shocked when I saw her I didn't know what to say. I was making such a stink about them being gay that I just swallowed my nausea.

The fact that every foster home she has ever been in buys her cigarettes and allows her to openy smoke doesn't seem to bother anyone either. Everytime I made an issue out of that the foster parents just got a reprimand and continued to do the same as always. Their explaination was always the same. "When they come to us they have already been through so much that it seems a small compromise." In my daughter's case smoking was one of the things she was rebelling about; the fact that we punished her when we caught her smoking. I have a big soap box to stand on when it comes to children smoking and adults who contribute to it. Don't worry, it has been made very clear to me that my opinions have little to no merit when it comes to raising my own children. [/list]

[rlfroo]

Donita wrote:
Don't worry, it has been made very clear to me that my opinions have little to no merit when it comes to raising my own children

Yes I do worry! Your opinions should matter, always. I sit hear and read some of these posts and they just turn my stomache. Maybe this is why I do mostly the drug exposed/addicted infangs. We never have to worry about such issues. I have never heard until now, that anyone would put a 13 year old on birth control, I don't know of a doctor who would do that either. As far as smoking, in my area the foster children are allowed to smoke, believe that or not. I believe they have to be 15 or 16. But 13? That is way to young. I am sorry that your rights are being so violated. I can't imagine why CPS would allow this. What does your lawyers say about all this? The birth control, hair coloring, smoking and the gay foster parent? I would be interested in hearing that. Am I the only foster parent who actual read from cover to cover our rules and regulations? I am appalled that this happens. But maybe I am just in my own little world over here with the drug babies, as I don't encounter those challanges.

[good dad]

Donita have you ever listed your complaints in a "Declaration of Facts" and filed it with the court or just complained to the caseworker?

[donita]

On the rape, I went to my lawyer who used my dispare to get me to stipulate by telling me that if I stipulated I could get my daughter home in two weeks. That was a flat out lie. I told the cw who I had to tell to file a police report against the perpetrators. Her response was " oh yes, I guess I should file a report with the police." She didn't do it, but I did, which generated zero response from anyone. I told the therapists who never ever encouraged her to talk about it. I told the new cw here in TN so that she would be careful with where she placed her. I was in the process of getting my daughter a therapy evaluation when the judge took her and my granddaughter. I tried to get them to follow through and get her therapy. She went once and was diagnosed as bipolar and put on medication that caused her extreme fatique. the first trial I didn't know anything about a "Declaration of Facts." My husbands attorney would have had to present it because my attorney thought I was a disgrace to woman kind. I did get to bring it up in this last trial, but they acted as though I didn't even say it. All they wanted to do was attack my husband and blame him for my daughters behavior. My daughter admitted she lied but that doesn't mean anything. I had a cw tell me a long time ago that it doesn't matter what anyone says, it only matters what they (cps)think. I thought she was crazy when she said it, but in our case no truer words have been spoken. The horrifying thing to me is that my daughter's rape wasn't a simple rape, not that there is such a thing, but she was handcuffed by MEN in a gand and raped. I am telling you foster children are the most unprotected children in America. An actual provable crime was commited toward my daughter and I have to remind a cw that she should file a police report. Those beasts tatooed thier gang mark on her as they were getting ready to take her to Mexico. She lives with that mark on her still today. She called me the day befor they were taking her to Mexico drugged out of her mind, please remember she is 13 and I have homeschooled her most of her life. There was a no contact order place on us, however, they had given us permission to search for her (she was missing for two weeks) cps didn't tell me she was missing until she had missed the second rescheduled supervised visitation. She called me on a Friday so we rented a motel to take care of her before taking her back to states custody. When she realised she was going to have to go back she age 13 stole my van and ran away again. That is when we found out the person she was with just got out of prison for second degree murder.

I don't know how much of this you want to hear, because the more I write the more I need to say to make things clear. I could not make anyone care that that happened to my daughter. The accusations against my husband and the fact that I wouldn't divorce him, because I did separate from him so that they would let her come home, caused my family to turn thier backs, our friends wouldn't even talk to us in public. In private they would say supportive things but in public they would cross the street on the other side. I had to go get a therapist just to have someone to talk to. that is why this site is so so important.

the alcholic fp admitted to drinking and passing out and buying cigarettes for my daughter. She is still a fp. I made the accusation to the cw and she went with me to the fp house to file a report on my accusation. She even admitted to leaving my 13yr old to run her inner city business by herself while she went to Las Vegas to gamble. I complained about the fp sexual parteners always spending the night, but the cw told me that her sexual activity was none of my or her business. this is in Kansas City KS. If you think Maryville TN is different; not much the drug user/dealers that they place her in here still has 3 young children in thier home. I actually called the police to turn her in and they treated me as a trouble maker and called the fp who then called me about a dozen times in 10 min. She then black mailed my daughter by threatening to set her up to lose her daughter which she had when she was barely 15.

The things that helped me get them both out was God, my sunday school class, and the information and support from this web site. Senator Finney helped some too.

your tired of reading by now I'm sure.

[fightingfor3]

I know this is an older thread but I wanted to say a couple of things on the subject.

First I wanted to remind everyone that we have all been screwed by CPS and the system in whole. No one more than the other. That is why we all came here. This should be a welcoming and understanding place. Most of us have been turned away by our community and all of us have had our civil liberties trampled on. The point should not be of your personal lifestyle choices but to PROTECT THE FREEDOM to parent and make those decisions for each of our families as we see fit.

There is NO explanation as to why CPS does what they do other than money. Each of our children are worth a dollar amount to them and that is all they see. It doesn't matter why and who they screw, what matters is that we collectively fight back. You don't need money. Or a really good lawyer. Or a really nice social worker. It doesn't change anything.

What concerns me in this thread is that it seems there was more of an issue raised and people listened more that this child was placed with a gay couple RATHER THAN THE FACT THAT THE KIDS WERE TAKEN BY THE STATE?

And if there were no charges, and no court, no nothing, you signed your own protection order. You yourself violated your own rights by signing that paper. CPS doesn't care about half of what they do, they do it expecting you will fail. They don't give us drug examines when we have never had a history of drugs because they suspect that we are using but because they can use it against us when we miss an appointment and then label us non compliant. See? They don't need a court order because you AGREED. That's why THEY wrote it and had YOU sign it. I am happy that your kids are back home with you and I can understand why you did what you did. But I feel like you need to concentrate on the fact that the state still has custody and your husband still out of the home. You are providing care and doing all the great things any parents would but they can come in and rip them out again any time. They are now invited into your home any time any day. These issues seem to be more important than who your children live with, to me anyway, and I believe if you made “a stink“ about that you can do the same about all the atrocities that have happened to your children. I don't say pick your battles, I say prioritize them.

Good Luck.

[Frustrated]

I agree that we need to PROTECT OUR Consitutional Rights and keep it there, our Freedom to do what we think is right. Our additional Rights of Privacy and Parental Rights should be respected in every matter as well.

Let's keep fight to remind them of our Rights. Period. No question about it. If they complain about it, take us to Criminal Court, and charge us with a Crime or stay out of our Homes and stay away from our Families.

Period.