Tips that may be helpful

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jensmom
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Tips that may be helpful

Postby jensmom » Tue May 15, 2007 6:46 am

Never, ever speak negatively of your child to anyone. People who don't know you well -- like teachers or health care providers -- might get the wrong impression.

When your child starts school, make friends with the teacher, guidance counselors, principal, school secretary. Be sure they know what a nice person you are, what a good and responsible parent. Attend PTA meetings, be as visible at the school as possible, like volunteering if your schedule permits. If any false accusations are made against you, you'll need these people on your side. CPS can go to the school and interview everyone who knows your child or who has interacted with him/her, like the school nurse, or the secretary.

If your child (especially a toddler) acts up in public -- meltdowns at Walmart because you won't buy him a toy -- don't take him anywhere. Leave him with a relative or sitter. This may sound extreme, but someone could follow you to your car as you are carrying your crying child away and write down your license plate number. A store employee could call the police after observing your child kicking and screaming face down on the floor.

Listen to what your child says about her day at school. Be on the alert if she says the teacher or guidance counselor talked to her alone and asked questions about her parents, or how they punished or disciplined her.

Don't ever leave your child(ren) alone in the car for even a minute while you run inside a store to pick up something. In most states this constitutes child neglect or endangerment. Your children will likely be removed from your custody on the spot, should someone call the police.

Build good support systems in your friends and family. Be active in the community, join a church, if you are perpetually angry (as I used to be) get help. When I was falsely accused, I was going through a divorce and was very angry, and it went against me as far as CPS was concerned.

Protect yourself against false accusations a child may make against you. I did not allow my child to have sleepovers, and I have never volunteered with any children's groups at church. Many such groups now have policies in place preventing any adult to be alone with a child, to protect the worker as much as the child.
A friend of mine, who thought I was terrible for not allowing my daughter to have sleepovers, changed her tune when a child at her own daughter's sleepover said to the husband "I'm gonna tell my parents you tried to molest me!" when he told them to turn off the TV and go to sleep.

Be aware of the "red flags" CPS looks at: a single parent, financial stress, unemployment, parent has no close friends or family support, parent is a loner -- these are all, as far as CPS is concerned, red flags for child abusers.

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Frustrated
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Postby Frustrated » Tue May 15, 2007 7:08 am

Thanks for the Tips. That is true.

I have had the same thing happened to me when a Child stays here, called 911. *Sigh...She was playing with the phones with my daughter. It all came back to haunt me and my family because of that. Now CPS thinks something happened.
So I refuse to have this friend in my house. She is a trouble maker. Just like you said "I am going to tell my parents you tried to molest me". That is what she did to us. I told her she is not allowed near my yard, nor playing in my house. There are children who were taught how to call for help even if they don't get their way, they will use this to get what they want. Which is pretty sad.

I know children are taught at school by CPS to call or tell them if they are in desire help, but they are getting the wrong message. Such as if they are not getting what they wanted like NO TV, or going to bed early, not allowed this or that....they will scream bloody murder and call or tell CPS.
It is scary. That mischievous action can damage a Family almost instanteous because the child learned how to get his or her way.
It is easy to steal from poor people. But don't do it. And don't take advantage of those poor people in court. The Lord is on their side. He supports them and he will take things away from any person that takes from them.~ Proverbs 22:22

jensmom
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I agree!

Postby jensmom » Tue May 15, 2007 1:39 pm

About children calling 911 for help when they don't get their own way & getting parents in trouble.

My daughter & her friend, who were both 8 or 9 at the time, were "playing with the phone" and called 911. They hung up, but the police came about 15 minutes later to be sure everything was okay. I was asleep and didn't know what had happened until the cop rang the doorbell. He was nice enough, though, and told the girls they could get in serious trouble for calling 911 as a prank. They denied doing it, but there was no one else in the house. After he left, I sent the other child home, and told my daughter the girl was not to come back to our house.

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Frustrated
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Postby Frustrated » Tue May 15, 2007 7:48 pm

Right on. Because these CPS People can make your life like Hell over some kids playing with the phones. And they think otherwise did indeed happened. Just when the police said the kids were laughing and eating and watching TV, and well groomed and the house was in good order. He put all of this in his incident report. *sigh...but he told CPS anyways. *sigh...CPS is bothering me for 5 months now over this 911 call. She seems not to get the message and won't get it through her head. I told her there was an incident report that states that the kids were fine, and having fun, and they were great and the house was in order. NOTHING HAPPENED!! She drags on and on...
She still doing it, ya know? Its been since Feb. and she is still DRAGGING IT ON AND ON!!!
It is easy to steal from poor people. But don't do it. And don't take advantage of those poor people in court. The Lord is on their side. He supports them and he will take things away from any person that takes from them.~ Proverbs 22:22

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mom2boys
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Postby mom2boys » Fri May 18, 2007 2:46 pm

Just a side note....

DO NOT TEACH YOUR CHILDREN '911'

YES, I know but wait............................

TEACH YOUR CHILDREN '0' only when their old enough to understand.

OPERATORS WILL FORWARD TO 911 IF its AN emergency. They are not trained to forward a call from a playing child. At least this way you have a chance.

:)

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Frustrated
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Postby Frustrated » Fri May 18, 2007 3:07 pm

That's where you are wrong. 911 operators are by Law has to report anything to the Police of any protection concerns of any child in the home. They have to refer to the police to send to your house to check to make sure the house is ok, and your child is OK!

That's what happened to me. The police was sent here to check to make sure everything is ok. Wrote down that the house is in order, and the children were FINE. HOWEVER....the police has to by LAW that if there are children involved in ANY Incident and if they have protection concerns, they report their reports to CPS!
That's what happened to me. That's because at the same time, while the child was playing with the phone, that my partner was in the house and he was arrested for breaking supposed conditions BUT THE CONDITIONS WERE ALREADY VOID at that time. But the Police DID NOT BELIEVE US! So we had to go back to court and modified it again.

I LEARNED how to get everything in WRITING!! :roll:
It is easy to steal from poor people. But don't do it. And don't take advantage of those poor people in court. The Lord is on their side. He supports them and he will take things away from any person that takes from them.~ Proverbs 22:22

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proudmom4life
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Not Leaving Your Child In The Car When You Go To The Store

Postby proudmom4life » Sun Jun 17, 2007 10:47 pm

I Was Watching Local News About A Month Or So When There Was A Story On About Woman Who Left Her Little Boy In The Car Unlocked With Keys In The Ignition While She Went Into The 7-11 For Nachos. Someone Took Off With Her Car. The Police Found The Car A Ways Down The Road With The Toddler Inside Unharmed And The Responding Office Commented For All Of Us To Hear In Shock "We're Just Glad The Boy Is Unharmed And Back With Mom Safe & Sound" WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?!!!! When You Leave Your Kid Like That & That Happens, Both Parent & Car Thief Should Go To Jail - Parent For Leaving The Kid In An Unlocked Car With The Keys In The Ignition. That Is PURE NEGLECT!!!! Sends A Message That Bad Parents Get Off Easy Even When That Kind Of Child Endangerment Occurs. http://shannieiner.tk

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Dazeemay
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Postby Dazeemay » Mon Jun 18, 2007 4:40 am

In my day it was not considered neglect to run into the store and get an item or two and leave the children in the car with it running.

I believe our world has gone nuts with judging one another and that is the reason cps gets so many calls. I don't believe it is neglect on the parents part in this case nor is she a bad parent; just bad judgment for this day and age.

Judge Judy admonished a woman for what she felt was her duty to call cps on parents. I can't remember the exact words Judge Judy used but, it was a long the lines that she was a nasty woman. The people in the court room clapped when the Judge admonished her.

If the parents were arrested in this case guess who would get the child? You may want to punish the parent but, it is the child who loses more in regards to his or her life.

Personally I have seen some bad judgment on the part of parents and if I am around I admonish them to think twice before they take the actions they have taken and then I tell them why.

We cannot think like cps does.
**********************************
This is not legal advice;hopefully wisdom

To put it in simple terms…when the authorities ARE the perpetrators and the perpetrators ARE the authorities, there is no earthly justice or recourse, at the end of the day (unless the American people wake up).

Therefore, those who have achieved the highest levels of power seek to ‘enjoy’ the most grievous and extreme injustices. For many of those in the highest circles of power, the greatest statement of power is to perpetrate the greatest possible injustice…the savage, brutal traumatization and abuse of an innocent child.
http://themurkynews.blogspot.com/ MattTwoFour

"Ultimately, the law is only as good as the judge" --- D.X. Yue, 2005, in "law, reason and judicial fraud"
http://www.parentalrightsandjustice.com/index.cgi?ctype=Page;site_id=1;objid=45;curloc=Site:1

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katgotsteve
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Postby katgotsteve » Mon Jun 18, 2007 5:20 am

as members of this forum we have all been accused of so many different things. the only crime we are truly guilty of is being human. cps would like to take the human factor out of parenting, but then where does that leave everyone. they put these text book standards on raising children, did your children come with a manual? i know mine did not.
i think of the woman who left her child in the car. as a mother there were times when i wanted to just walk in the store and get soda without pulling my child out of a car seat, but i always took her or i did without a soda. she made a bad choose, it is just that plain and simple. i dont think it was criminal. there was another story in my local area, a toddler walked off and was missing for hours, no one knew where the child was, it was on the news. the child was found, i cant remember the details, but it was considered a mistake, a bad situation. does that family need charges brought against them? was it criminal?
we, as members of this forum, know what is like to have our lives turned upside down becuase of a mistake or poor judgement. we should not judge anyone else. everyone makes mistakes, i know as a parent i have. i am willing to take responsibility for my mistakes, but cps needs to step up and do that also. we also have to remember, being criminally neglectful and neglectful by cps standards are two different categories. it is like night and day with a large span inbetween. a mistake is a mistake, a crime is a crime. there are great differences.

Marina
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Postby Marina » Mon Jun 18, 2007 7:51 am

.

Social workers make mistakes too.

Here is a menu to pick from:

http://forum.fightcps.com/viewtopic.php?t=6748

.

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proudmom4life
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To Dazeemay - It Used To Be Okay

Postby proudmom4life » Mon Jun 18, 2007 3:31 pm

In An Ideal Society It Would Be Great If We Could Trust The Safety Of Our Children Alone In The Car To Run Into The Store Just To Get A Few Things, But Obviously Its Not Safe Any More. In Fact, Its Better To Be Safe Than Sorry Obviously. I'm Nothing Like CPS But I Do Know That Even If I'm What Some People Would Consider Overprotective, I'd Rather Not Take Chances With My Kids For 2 Reasons - 1 Purely For Protecting My Children Whom I Love And Would Die If Anything Happened To And For 2 There Is That Failure To Protect Your Children Penalty. They Enforce Protecting Your Kids For The Same Goal You Have - Protecting Your Kids. Not That I Agree With CPS But With Some Thing s I Do See 2 Sides To Every Story Or Just Have My Own Opinion. But That Is A Substantial Concern. The Kid In My Story Was Physically Unharmed But Put In Jeopardy Because Someone Tired To Stea The Car Not Knowing A Toddler Was Inside. But Otherwise,The State Destroyed Our Lives And I Don't Want To Add Insult To Injury If Something Happened To One Of My Children. I Don't Want My Children Hurt And If God Forbid Something Happened I Don't Want The State Breathing Down My Neck Because They Want To Hold Me Responsible For My Children's Safety Even Though I'd Never Intentionally Hurt My Children But They Thought I Did. Protection Is Utmost Important And We Have To Protect Our Children From Everything Potentially Harmful EVEN DCFS(State Of Utah Calls CPS DCFS Division Of Child & Family Services)/CPS. Isn't That Why We're All Here? http://dear.to/preservefamily


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