Will they leave us alone now?

[Trisha G]

We found out we're going to have a baby sometime in March. After having dealt with CPS twice and everything we went through the second time, how can we make sure they leave us alone now? We live in a two bedroom trailer, our dauther is in high school and by the time the lack of a bedroom could really become an issue for a baby or toddler she'll be old enough to be out on her own. CPS approved our son having his own bed in the living room, so if they try to pull anything regarding lack of space, can I tell them where to stick it? We do have a complaint filed since they never gave us a case plan in the last case, but will showing them we know our rights and won't tolerate their tactics really be enough to make them leave us alone? I don't trust CPS as a whole and I know how dirty Boone County Indiana is, so what are the odds they won't come back as soon as they find out I'm pregnant? We're not letting very many people know about the baby because we really don't trust our neighbors. I'm almost sure the woman who called on us knows somebody in the office since her son and daughter get by with letting their kids live in filth and even let the 3 year old run the streets after dark with no supervision. I know people who have called on them, including another grandparent of the children, yet there's never been an open case against them.

[Dazeemay]

They will not leave you alone because you are in the system.

You need to look at the guardianship forum on this site.

If you decide to go this route make sure that you know the ones you picked can be trusted. If you feel secure in that decision and when it is time for the baby to arrive let the hospital know who the guardian is when you are signing entrance papers. Don't make a big issue of it, just put it somewhere on the papers. However, you would need a copy of where you stated that for your protection.

Now if it should happen that cps comes around and sees that you have a guardian they may not bother you because we know it is all about them wanting guardianship for the fraudulent monies they receive. This would be a lot of trouble and time for them to go to. But, if they proceed then the judge will check out the guardians and decide whether they can take the baby.

You will always have to stay on top of cps issues so that you are never got off guard.

BTW! Congratulations!!

[Kenneth2816]

I am very sorry that something as wonderful and beautiful as having another child has turned into something to dread because of CPS.

I don't think they can really bother you unless they open a new case. I know in my state, newborns can be taken at birth if a mother has had a prior TPR. If you have a closed case, and simply by virtue of having another child, I cannot see the state has any standing to interfere in any way.

Now, if a nosy neighbor files any kind of complaint at all-this gives them legal grounds to "investigate". We all know that CPS never tells a parent they have rights, and that they use any and everything we say against us.

Since you already know the game, you won't be the victim again. If they call or come out, absolutley insist on a warrant or court order before letting them in your home. Wish I had done this 0 months ago.

[Marina]

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Hospitals have social workers, and I would assume that they troll through at the files of every new mother to look for somebody to "help." Personally, I would be afraid.

It seems to me that the state would have "standing" to interfere with anybody who has ever been involved in the system, regardless of whether there was an incident. All they would need would be an assessment of "risk" made by the hospital social worker, based on records on file, which may or may not be accurate.

Having been in the System before does not decrease the risk of future involvement, but increases the risk, in my opinion, based on what I have seen on this forum.

Having been victimized before, and knowing the game, sometimes results in increased efforts by the agency to coerce the parents into cooperating, in order to make a believer out of them. This is my personal observation on this forum.


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[katgotsteve]

first off, congrats trisha!!! i too am in the same boat as you, knocked up and always fighting them. my husband has finally been allowed home, not by them, but lack of them. they just walked away from us, a whole year of fighting, just for them to walk away....

i know it is hard not to fear them, but you have to just stand your ground. i agree with kenneth, dont let them in your house, keep conversations to a minium, make them tell you why they are there. my cousin had a problem with them, her daughter got mad at her and called dfacs on her, they came out the daughter admitted she lied about the chair being thrown at her, but that her mom did slap her. when pressed why, her mom had caught her chatting online with some guys, this is not the first time she has caught her and this daughter has snuck out and met at 20 yr old when she was 14. the girl doesnt use really good judgement and my cousin is a little high strung, but it is still not abuse, not something most parents do, but not abuse. they let the case drag on for over two months, she used their policy to get them close it. they finally left her alone after she stood up to them, she said if you want to investigate me and accuse me of abuse, then you need to arrest me and charge me. i am not going to let you decide how i choose parent my child. like i said they backed down. show them you know what they are suppose to do. hang in there for the health of your baby...i have had to do that. i found out friday, i am having a girl, i guess i was never meant to have a boy. lol...
i gather you have an age gap between your children too, my other daughter is 12 and my stepsons are 24, 22, 19. hang in there trish, it will work out, i promise. just stay educated and informed and one step ahead of them.

[Dazeemay]

My daughter got our granddaughter back via the judge ruling in our favor. But, according to the state laws in NC she and my granddaughters names will be on the registry for 10 years. Some states make it lifetime. Our lawyer would not confront the judge on expunging their names.

Here is a link to state registry laws.

http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/ ... tryall.pdf

Here is a link that is to be really feared. This bill is trying to be introduced and if it is life will even be worse for us as parents and grandparents. I have watched the number of supporters increase since finding this.

The number went from two to twelve.

It is a bill, " To require the Attorney General to establish a Federal register of cases of child abuse or neglect."

http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/bdquery/z ... 00764:@@@P

[Trisha G]

Thank you for the advice and the congratulations. We'll talk to the family who is already willing to take our older two children if CPS ever comes around again. They are some of our oldest and most trusted friends. As for an age gap, our daughter will be 16 next month and our son almost 14 when the baby's born. They're both thrilled. I never had to deal with hospital social workers with the older kids, and I'll tell them I don't want any services if they come around this time.

[Kenneth2816]

Trisha:

Your posts are proof positive that almost any encounter with CPS has lasting scars. I think it one of the saddest things that you, as an expectant Mother should, of all things, find that a feeling of fear is as prominent as one of joy over bringing another child into the world.

Once, I was an optimistic, trusting, compassionate person who chose to get involved when others less fortunate than myself fell on hard times, or had need of certain things.

I've never encountered anything as abusive, insulting,degrading as the outright fraud and deceit, abuse of power, and the presence of malice that was aimed at me during a CPS investigation.

I won't say that it has made me less than who I am, but I will say that I don't believe I will ever again have a total sense of security or an attitude that the safety of my own home, the sanctity of my own family can ever be taken for granted again.

The legacy of CPS is destruction that can take on many forms. 69,000 families this year will be permanently deconstructed by court orders, many of them based on fabricated evidence, and 267,000 children will have been legally "freed" for adoption, with 39,000 each year (many of them having been in the sytem as "unwanted"- too old, too many issues,etc. for too many years) and 25% of them will be homeless, jobless or in jail within 1 year.

My child is one of the fortunate ones. He will not be a statistic. He is after almost 10 months, soon coming back to my home. But his own life, his child-likeness, the light that once danced in his eyes now dimmed, are all the proof I will ever need that the most important battle I have or ever will have fought was on his behalf against such a heartless, mindless and brutal machine as CPS.

It is not without great pause that I confess, I never knew such evil existed within a country such as ours.

With the remaining days I am alloted on this earth, I will not let pass a single oppurtunity to warn others or to share what knowledge I have gained, nor will I ever judge another human being as I once did, who finds themselves in the cross hairs of CPS.