A joke

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Joined: Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:20 am
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A joke

Postby miasmom1028 » Wed Oct 01, 2008 6:57 am

It was too funny to pass up.

>> 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
>> 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
>> 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
>> 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
>> 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
>> 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
>> 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
>> 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
>> 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
>> 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
>> 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
>> Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre

>> little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the
>> other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
>> Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I
>> nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The
>> only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.
>> In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
>> Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
>> feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it
>> clearly demonstrates what I am capable of, however, they merely made
>> condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
>> Bastards!
>> There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
>> placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
>> However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that

>> my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what

>> this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
>> Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
>> tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
>> this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
>> I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
>> The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
>> seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
>> The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with
>> the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My
captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell,
so he is safe..... for now...

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Postby Greegor » Sun Feb 22, 2009 11:00 pm

Thank you! Loved it!

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