New CPS headache of the day

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stormynights472
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Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:36 pm

New CPS headache of the day

Postby stormynights472 » Fri Mar 16, 2012 1:31 pm

Apparently the 3 days ( Saturday, Sunday and Monday) these idiots had my children they notified the school that they were given back to me as having the only sole custody. My DH was drug tested again the day after my children were allowed back in my care and 6 days later the court allowed my husband to come home ( since he had a positive for marijuana in court they mandated until he was "clean" he wasn't allowed back home) with his custody reinstated. Well apparently this failed institution ( for lack of better terms) is good at giving BAD information but not good at giving GOOD information. Today my husband went to pick up our son for his doctor's appointment and I get a call from the school..Hello, this is the principal___ and we have your Husband here who is not allowed to leave with ( my son) I became concerned and said why in the world not? We'll get a doctor's note it's only 20 minutes before school ends. He said NO, that's not the problem. DYFS put a red flag on all your children's files saying only YOU have custody and we are not to speak with your husband or allow him on school property to talk to the kids, leave with them or even see them! At this point I became aggravated ( not with the principal as he is doing his job) so I told him that was an old order, my husband DOES INDEED have his custody of the children back and I told him I do not know why he wasn't notified. I had to give a taped statement telling the school I give permission for my DH to pick up my son from school! I then called the cw and of course no one responded back to me! Called left everyone under the sun the message to notify the schools ( as my children are in elem, middle and high schools in the township) so all of them can have update information!
Meanwhile my DH has NO idea what's going on he's sitting in the office and in walks a township cop. Just standing next to him watching him. After 20 minutes and my DH not knowing anything they finally produced my son! I called the doctor's office and informed them he was going to be late and that I was very sorry.
All of this while 2 night ago my 7 year old was diagnosed with PTSD! They are screwing up our lives more then anything else and then wanting us to comply with everything they want. They're STILL hounding me to go for another "random urine" I said show me where the court ordered it and I will be more then happy to do so but, until then, I will not be doing what they "tell me to do" because I am not obligated to follow their "demands" unless it's court mandated.
Funny how after all this NO ONE has gotten in touch with me in the past 3 days! I keep calling and leaving messages ( as all my emails were sent, none were returned but none were answered either) so I will just keep leaving messages expressing the urgency of this matter and that it needs to be resolved NOW not when they feel like it. How do they get away with doing all this to innocent people? I was actually told by the one CW well if you go along with what we suggest then we won't have to get it court ordered and drag this out longer but, I feel like they're only saying that because they know there is NO judge who will order the BS they want from us.

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Daruma
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Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby Daruma » Fri Mar 16, 2012 2:28 pm

I'm sorry you're going through all this. Until your case is closed, you will have to expect frequent inconveniences and degradations like this. Keep standing your ground.

I was actually told by the one CW well if you go along with what we suggest then we won't have to get it court ordered and drag this out longer

Or, Caseworker Lady, you could just admit that we've done everything the court ordered, the kids aren't in any danger, and close your case.
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

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Eljay
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Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby Eljay » Fri Mar 16, 2012 4:13 pm

It's not just a matter of *YOU* complying with the court orders, but *THEY* have to comply with the court orders. By asking you to do things that are NOT court ordered, THEY are going against court orders! Make sure you accuse them of going AGAINST court orders by ordering tests & services that were DENIED by the court, and by NOT making proper notifications to the school as to the change in custody orders/permissions for your husband. Make sure you escalate THAT as well. By them not doing their jobs (notifying the school of the change), they are preventing the court's orders from being carried out. That is furthermore creating a situation of MEDICAL NEGLECT by not allowing your child to get to his/her doctor's appointments.

Sounds crazy when you play the game by their rules, huh?
Advice & opinions provided are no substitute for genuine legal assistance. Laws & rules vary by state/jurisdiction so do your homework and get
an education in CPS laws, rules & practices so that you can FIGHT for your children's rights. I am not a lawyer. Your mileage may vary.

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stormynights472
Posts: 40
Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:36 pm

Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby stormynights472 » Sat Mar 17, 2012 10:31 am

Thank you both. It's just driving me a little nuts because when they ( cps) have a question for me or my husband ( whom they won't even speak to they ask ME to ask HIM) they call leave a voicemail if I can't grab the phone then call over and over again. The one day I was setting up my sons surgery appointment these people called 12 times in the 21 minutes I was on the phone! When I got off the phone with the hospital I called them back and said OK what was the urgency of your call?! They wanted to make sure I would be bringing the letter with me to court showing when the surgery would be done! Ok it was THAT stupid you had to blow up my phone?

Yes, it sounds completely ridiculous when you put THEM in the spotlight and turn on them what they do to us. My son did NOT miss his doctors appointment as I called the office and explained what happened to which my pediatrician was shocked over. He is shocked over ALL of what they've done thus far. It just stinks that I have all this needless worry over things that shouldn't even be an issue and wouldn't have been had these morons not involved themselves in my life and my family.

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Daruma
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Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby Daruma » Sat Mar 17, 2012 10:56 am

stormynights472 wrote:It's just driving me a little nuts because when they ( cps) have a question for me or my husband ( whom they won't even speak to they ask ME to ask HIM) they call leave a voicemail if I can't grab the phone then call over and over again.

You aren't their secretary. If you think he can handle himself well, you're within your rights to tell them that he's not home right now, but they can reach him at 123-4567 or via email.

On the other hand, if he's one of those trusting nice guys who would gladly help them manufacture all the rope they need to hang him from the tallest tree in town, perhaps it's a blessing in disguise if all the communication goes through you.

stormynights472 wrote:The one day I was setting up my sons surgery appointment these people called 12 times in the 21 minutes I was on the phone!

Well, obviously, obsessive-compulsive disorder doesn't keep you from succeeding in social work.
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

stormynights472
Posts: 40
Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:36 pm

Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby stormynights472 » Sat Mar 17, 2012 11:08 am

Daruma wrote:
stormynights472 wrote:It's just driving me a little nuts because when they ( cps) have a question for me or my husband ( whom they won't even speak to they ask ME to ask HIM) they call leave a voicemail if I can't grab the phone then call over and over again.

You aren't their secretary. If you think he can handle himself well, you're within your rights to tell them that he's not home right now, but they can reach him at 123-4567 or via email.

On the other hand, if he's one of those trusting nice guys who would gladly help them manufacture all the rope they need to hang him from the tallest tree in town, perhaps it's a blessing in disguise if all the communication goes through you.

stormynights472 wrote:The one day I was setting up my sons surgery appointment these people called 12 times in the 21 minutes I was on the phone!

Well, obviously, obsessive-compulsive disorder doesn't keep you from succeeding in social work.


Oh your last sentence had me laughing! That's exactly what I said!! When my husband answers the phone they talk to him like he's 5 years old then ask to speak to me. He can handle himself well they just won't speak to him. Other day prime example, the CW called my hubby answered the phone and said hello, we need to speak to mom so he said well she's busy right now with the therapist and our son can I help you? The cw then said No, just have mom give us a call when she is done. The reason BEHIND their phone call was to tell me that the drug/alcohol lady needs to have my husband go in and sign a medical release form. With that I said then you need to speak to him and handed him the phone. CW says oh hello, we need you to sign a medical release, hubby says "ok, but I will write it up". She said ok then you're not complying? He said oh I'm absolutely willing to comply but the rehab/counselor is only going to be getting my medical information from my assesment not anything else or information about our cps case. She said well we don't allow that so he asked why? What law is he breaking? She said she would have to run it by the supervisor and call back. She hasn't called back as of yet.

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Daruma
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Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby Daruma » Sat Mar 17, 2012 2:01 pm

stormynights472 wrote:CW says oh hello, we need you to sign a medical release, hubby says "ok, but I will write it up".

My opinion: don't tell them what you're going to do. Just do it.

In warfare, there are three things you always want to know about your enemy: their intentions, their location, and their capability. Location isn't an issue in your situation, but the other two are. Stop giving them warning of your intentions.

Caseworker: We need you to come in and sign a medical release.
Hubby: Okay, I'll take care of that first thing next week.

Then he mails (registered/return receipt) or drops off his customized signed release.

Don't even give the caseworker a chance to accuse him of not cooperating. Let her scramble to keep up with you after the fact. Forewarned is forearmed. Stop warning her.
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

stormynights472
Posts: 40
Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:36 pm

Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby stormynights472 » Sat Mar 17, 2012 4:29 pm

Daruma wrote:
stormynights472 wrote:CW says oh hello, we need you to sign a medical release, hubby says "ok, but I will write it up".

My opinion: don't tell them what you're going to do. Just do it.

In warfare, there are three things you always want to know about your enemy: their intentions, their location, and their capability. Location isn't an issue in your situation, but the other two are. Stop giving them warning of your intentions.

Caseworker: We need you to come in and sign a medical release.
Hubby: Okay, I'll take care of that first thing next week.

Then he mails (registered/return receipt) or drops off his customized signed release.

Don't even give the caseworker a chance to accuse him of not cooperating. Let her scramble to keep up with you after the fact. Forewarned is forearmed. Stop warning her.


Thank you! I didn't even think about that. I've never been able to tell them I'll get to something next week or even in a day or they say ok, we'll bring it to you or you need to find a way to make this happen today as it won't look good for you in court. That's what I get told even though it's THEIR problem but, thank you for the advice I won't say anything I'll just show up when I do and give them what I feel is necessary. :)

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Daruma
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Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby Daruma » Sat Mar 17, 2012 5:23 pm

Just to be clear: I don't mean you can never make an appointment in advance or tell them you'll drop something off... just don't give away your tactics in advance. :wink:
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

stormynights472
Posts: 40
Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:36 pm

Re: New CPS headache of the day

Postby stormynights472 » Sun Mar 18, 2012 7:16 am

Daruma wrote:Just to be clear: I don't mean you can never make an appointment in advance or tell them you'll drop something off... just don't give away your tactics in advance. :wink:


Thanks! I will definitely follow your advice :)


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