Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

For those concerned about children and parents in CPS cases.

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Remember me
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Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby Remember me » Tue Nov 04, 2014 10:22 am

I'm the parental grandma trying to get custody of my son's baby girl. Both my son and his girlfriend (baby's mother) were murdered. CPS immediatly that same night gave my baby girl to a couple who went into the program of foster parents to adopt. (??) We have had several cout dates two of which I believe were intentionally postponed and when reschedule the baby had been under the care of the foster parents for a little over six months and therefore they filed for adoption and were at the rescheduled court hearing. The last court hearing was so that I the grandma could get possession of my baby but Judge decided he didn't know what was going on with me and therefore left the baby with the foster parents. Child Advocates at one point was going to recommend the baby come with me but the private investigator went to the CPS director and had them change the recommendation to giving the baby to the foster parents. The reason being that the parents of the baby were involved in drugs and they are saying I neglected to protect my son and the baby. Most of it is history for instance I sent him with his Dad (my ex-husband) for about four months because he was getting involved in gangs. And around this time my ex-husband had pleaded not guilty to possession of drugs with intent to sale. Ex-husband received probabion and never did any time in jail. I realize how this sounds but I lived with him for 15 years and he was never involved in drugs and his son so wanted and needed to be with his Dad. I thought my son was being bad so as to get his Dad's attention and as a Mom I couldn't control him as a teenager. When my son returned to me he was out of the gang but still smoked marijuana occasionaly and I then continued to see him through boot camp, drug classes orderd by juvenille probabion system. There is so much detail but what I want to do is go to the news and want to know if anyone else has gone to the news and the outcome. :?:

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LindaJM
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Re: Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby LindaJM » Tue Nov 04, 2014 10:40 pm

Yes, lots of people go to the news. Sometimes making a case "high profile" helps a lot. Other times, not so much. There's no guarantee of anything but please keep trying.

Go see your county commissioner or board of supervisors to tell them what is going on. At meetings they should give you a few minutes to speak. They are in charge of County CPS. I would write to my county commissioner AND then go see him in private AND go to the meetings to tell them updates on your case... make it public.

Do you have an attorney? Since this has been through the court and the judge is the one who decided who the baby should live with, then the judge has to be the one to decide to let you have your grandchild.

Have you made friends with these foster parents? Many foster parents would be willing to have an open adoption so you could see your grandchild in the future. Of course, there's no legal guarantee that they would continue with the visitations after adoption... it would just be on their word of honor.

Please see an attorney for help if you haven't already.

You might be interested in reading a blog by Washington State Senator Pam Roach, who has helped many victims of CPS, especially grandparents. Here's one case about a little girl they called "Lilly" where the grandparents eventually got their granddaughter back: http://pamroachreport.blogspot.com/search?q=lilly

It might be a good idea to meet with your state legislators about this.
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Please keep in mind that none of us are lawyers and we can't give legal advice. We are simply telling you what we would do in a similar situation. It is to your advantage to get a lawyer.

"Evil flourishes when good men do nothing." - Edmund Burke ... so try to do something to change the system ...

heavyaaron
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Re: Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby heavyaaron » Wed Nov 05, 2014 11:25 am

Remember me wrote:I'm the parental grandma trying to get custody of my son's baby girl. Both my son and his girlfriend (baby's mother) were murdered. CPS immediatly that same night gave my baby girl to a couple who went into the program of foster parents to adopt. (??)


Many foster parents are interested in adoption. Keep in mind that roughly half of children who enter the foster care system are eventually adopted out. So, it's rather a good thing that so many people are willing to fost-adopt, lest there be endless numbers of children without loving homes.

We have had several cout dates two of which I believe were intentionally postponed and when reschedule the baby had been under the care of the foster parents for a little over six months and therefore they filed for adoption and were at the rescheduled court hearing. The last court hearing was so that I the grandma could get possession of my baby but Judge decided he didn't know what was going on with me and therefore left the baby with the foster parents. Child Advocates at one point was going to recommend the baby come with me but the private investigator went to the CPS director and had them change the recommendation to giving the baby to the foster parents. The reason being that the parents of the baby were involved in drugs and they are saying I neglected to protect my son and the baby.


Failure to protect is definitely a reason for deeming you unfit. But this would only apply if your son were a minor. Was he? If so, ummm... yeah, you failed to protect him from drugs, gangs, even death! I think the state has more than adequate cause to be concerned that you'd repeat that mistake. If, on the other hand, your son was emancipated, this would be an ungrounded position for the state to take (unless they had evidence that you failed to protect him even when he was still a minor.)

Most of it is history for instance I sent him with his Dad (my ex-husband) for about four months because he was getting involved in gangs.


That is completely irrelevant. Non-custodial parents are still obligated to protect their children, and thus can be found unfit because of their failure to protect.

And around this time my ex-husband had pleaded not guilty to possession of drugs with intent to sale. Ex-husband received probabion and never did any time in jail. I realize how this sounds but I lived with him for 15 years and he was never involved in drugs and his son so wanted and needed to be with his Dad. I thought my son was being bad so as to get his Dad's attention and as a Mom I couldn't control him as a teenager. When my son returned to me he was out of the gang but still smoked marijuana occasionaly and I then continued to see him through boot camp, drug classes orderd by juvenille probabion system. There is so much detail but what I want to do is go to the news and want to know if anyone else has gone to the news and the outcome. :?:


Personally, I don't think news is your correct outlet. I have only heard your story right here, and I think the state is absolutely correct in not placing the child in your care. You have demonstrated a failure to protect. You offer excuses for your decisions instead of taking responsibility for them. There is no reason to believe you would do differently with another child.

Remember me
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Re: Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby Remember me » Wed Nov 05, 2014 9:51 pm

I respect your comments. The story of my son is long. I do have the support of my family and my other adult children. I have faith that God is with us and I will not give up on getting custody of my grandchild. My son was an adult living on his own with his girlfriend who was also an adult. As I grieve the loss of my son I do not feel blameless but on the contrary I am always thinking of what I could have done and/or what did I do wrong. But I never gave up and I won't give up now. I want the baby to know that she is loved from family. I am not perfect but I can say that my love is unconditional for my kids and grandkids.

heavyaaron
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Re: Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby heavyaaron » Thu Nov 06, 2014 6:18 am

Remember me wrote:My son was an adult living on his own with his girlfriend who was also an adult.


That makes all the difference in the world. You have no obligation to protect an adult child. If he got into drugs, gangs, etc. as an adult that is not your responsibility. I am left wondering why the state did not immediately place your grandchild with you.

I am still not convinced that the news is your best course of action. That's a bit of a crap shoot. The more obvious course of action is to talk to your lawyer (or obtain one if you do not have one.)

Perhaps the state suspects that you knew of your grandchild's unsafe living conditions at home and did not report it? That's rather thin, though, I would think.

As I grieve the loss of my son I do not feel blameless but on the contrary I am always thinking of what I could have done and/or what did I do wrong. But I never gave up and I won't give up now. I want the baby to know that she is loved from family. I am not perfect but I can say that my love is unconditional for my kids and grandkids.


I am deeply sorry for your loss. I literally cannot imagine the pain.

Remember me
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Re: Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby Remember me » Thu Nov 06, 2014 9:03 pm

The reason is that I failed to protect my son and baby.

I do have a lawyer and I did ask about going to the media but as of yet have not received any input.
Will post updates as I receive them. Thank you.

Remember me
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Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2014 7:08 am

Re: Gone to the news with story regarding CPS

Postby Remember me » Sun Dec 28, 2014 7:13 pm

Just an update. A coincidence or not after my court dates were rescheduled it was after six months which my grandbaby had been with the foster parents. Needless to say that right before we went to our last court date the foster parents had filed for adoption and child advocates agreed with the adoption. I am very disappointed at the discovery of how our government works and how grandparents have no rights. Haven't decided on joining to the media as of yet. We are going to trial by jury in 2015. I did receive more weekly visits.


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