there is hope !!!

A place for parents who have been through a termination of parental rights. Please network here on ways to reconnect with your children, cope with the trauma of separation, and promote advocacy against this cruel system of family destruction.

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Joined: Tue Aug 09, 2016 7:38 am

there is hope !!!

Postby [email protected] » Tue Aug 09, 2016 11:45 am

My daughter was taken wrongly on false alligations 20 years ago.The alligations that they got even slightly correct was things like I have a mental disorder I have
Adhd but they lied and said I had severe untreatable bipolar and even got a psychology intern to falsify his cradential saying he was a phycologist and do a false psychological evaluation giving the false diagnoses (I did not find out about the false credentials until later). They said I violently shook my daughter but there was no medical evidence of a shaking, the only type of shaking I ever gave was a gentle wake up shake as was her doctors Instructions because she had sleep apnea and would stop breathing in her sleep setting off her breathing alarm, usually waking her would restart her breathing, if it didn't I was to start CPR and call 911 the list goes on but all were either out right lies or twisted half truths. The first home they put her in she was dirty (how do you justify a 4 week old baby have long uncut fingers nails stuffed full of black dirt? ), she was difficult to wake up and sleep 90% of the time on visits acting heavily drugged, and had small scratches and cuts on her private area that could easily be seen on diaper changes. I took pictures and took notes of her condition how long it took me to wake her, how long she stayed awake, how long she slept, any dirt or marks I found on her ect and threatened to take the evidents to the papers and any one else who would listen if they didn't get her out of that home and they moved her to a great foster home to a family that if I had to place her for adoption I would of chosen (it wasn't as good as her being home but at least she was safe). The social worker adnitted to me she had planned all along to perminately place her with this family but had to place her in a short term placement first. I was punished for my making them move her early by having my visits cut to once a month if I remeber correctly (I know they were cut back but things like length of time between visits has become blured by time) My rights were eventually severed when she was still less than a year old and that family adopted her. I lost her for 19 long years but she found her younger brother who I'd kept out of the state's grasp by learning there tricks and setting up safety preventive measures making it impossible for them to touch him like a guardianship paper signing imidiately custody of him over to a trusted person in the event of my being unable to care for him for any reason including but not limited to illness,death and state involvement for any reason, which effectively stopped them in there tracks.I had other tricks up my sleeve as well which I will not post here. I had sever ptsd do to losing my daughter (and still do) but found strength in staying on step ahead of any attempt to abduct my son and they tried for the first three or four years of his life to steal him but once he got past the prime adoption age they left me alone. As he became a teen I started helping other at risk mother's who were friends who had lost one child and was only holding onto there current children on a hope and a prayer most were mildly abusive or neglectful in some small ways. Mostly as a result of either trauma they had indured or lack of parent training and being tio afraid to reach out for parenting classes. I gained strength and healing by teaching them to be better parents and by standing up for them with the state.last year when my son was 17 his 19 year old sister reached out to him through email she had seen a YouTube video he had made as a school project about 7 years before telling about having aspergers a autism spectrum disorder and offering hope to others with the condition and some how she suspected he was her lost brother and sent an email to the email address that was attached to the video, which was my email. From this they now write and text regularly and we all have met once she is terified of me do to the lies told to her and was very reluctant to meet me but my son pushed her into it. She is still afraid of me and still believes the lies it will take time for her to accept me and is only communicating with her brother for now although I did get to tell her my side of the story when we met. I'm comfident in time she will warm up to me I just have to give her her space and let her move at her own pace. I want all who read this to know there is hope, you can have other kids without losing them too as long as you learn all the tricks and put safe guards in place before they show up and yes there is a chance you'll be reunited with your lost children again !!! Just be patient with them when you do they are just as much a victim in this as you are but they may not know it and in fact may believe you are a monster that hurt them. Do not take this to heart be patient and show them the truth through your gentle patient love.

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