My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :(

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noroses4u2c
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My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :(

Postby noroses4u2c » Fri Aug 05, 2011 10:40 am

Last minute my daughter called me, and they are allowing an overnight.

She is sitting beside me. My baby is sitting beside me, jabbering away to my stepsister who is here visiting with her.

She is going to spend tonight and tomorrow night. They're coming back to get her on Sunday.

It feels so weird having her here. She's so happy and talkative.

I cannot describe how I feel. I know I should be happy, but I am too much in shock. I had no idea it was going to happen. I am in total shock. And I feel guilty that I feel shock instead of happy.

But I am glad she is here at the same time.

Does that make any sense??
Last edited by noroses4u2c on Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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Daruma
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me

Postby Daruma » Sat Aug 06, 2011 7:44 am

It makes perfect sense.

Your emotions have been toyed with so often, it's a wonder you haven't gone permanently numb.

Hope the rest of the visit goes really well. I am happy for you and your daughter.
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

treytrey1
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me

Postby treytrey1 » Sat Aug 06, 2011 10:27 am

I pray this is a road to reunification for you. You both deserve happiness.

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family_man
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me

Postby family_man » Sat Aug 06, 2011 11:48 am

This is a remarkable development! I must say that after reading all of your posts, I feared that reunification was not in the cards for you. Now I'm very optimistic that it is. Congratulations, and best wishes for you both!
Disclaimer: I am not an attorney, and this is not legal advice.

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KDus
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me

Postby KDus » Sat Aug 06, 2011 12:39 pm

Take as much video and photos as you can. Don't let your guard down. Your child will be interviewed after.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me

Postby noroses4u2c » Sun Aug 07, 2011 12:45 pm

My girl is gone. They came and got her almost an hour ago.

It hurts really bad.

And they said they didn't know when I'd be allowed to see her again.

Last night I took her to see a movie she was wanting to see. She enjoyed the visit.

The whole visit though she kept getting cat hair on her and immediately freaking out about it each time. The foster mom gets upset about hair being on her. She kept worrying about the fostermom finding out about stuff.

I don't know when I'll get to see her again.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me

Postby noroses4u2c » Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:17 pm

I didn't hear anything about visitation today, so I went anyway just in case. My daughter was there. She informed me that she wasn't supposed to have been having overnight visits with me yet and that someone at the family services was getting into trouble over it. Another child was supposed to have been doing overnights instead of her. So someone is being wrote up as endangering a child from this "mistake" and is getting fired.

I learned that they had no intention of letting my daughter have overnights at all and are still geared toward sending her to live with her bio-father.

The mistake caused a scandal at CPS. My daughter thought it was hilarious and was telling everyone she could about it. They kept scolding her, telling her to be quiet about it. They don't want news of it to get out.

They are talking about ending visitation during the investigation I reckon it is until they can figure out what to do about it. I won't know until later on if I will still be allowed to see my child at all or not. They ended the supervising for sure, and the supervisor for the visits was told today that it was her last day for them.

So now I just have to wait.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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Daruma
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby Daruma » Mon Aug 08, 2011 6:50 pm

I'm sorry to hear they plan to end visitation.

How richly ironic that someone is getting fired for "endangering" your daughter. Instead of drawing the logical conclusion ("Hey, her daughter survived an entire overnight unharmed! Maybe she's not such a bad mom after all!"), they're willing to sacrifice one of their own to keep up the pretense. Now at least one former social worker in Kentucky understands how you must feel.

You and your daughter were meant to have that time together, and CPS was powerless to stop it.

The court should hear about this visit if at all possible. They should hear that it worked out well and that no harm came to your daughter. Can your lawyer be persuaded to enter it as evidence in your behalf?

It would be VERY interesting to see if the fired social worker files an appeal; will he or she argue that your daughter wasn't in any danger, and if so, would you lawyer have access to the appeal records to use them in your behalf? Just wondering. I don't know if this is even possible or not but it's something you could check out.
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

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monkette31
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby monkette31 » Mon Aug 08, 2011 9:23 pm

Hi, I really doubt that anything will happen to this caseworker. Even after all the child deaths while children are in custody of the county or state, nothing ever happens to them. There was one out here who even was promoted to supervisor sometime afterwards. They are immune to everything and will probably look for information from you to make it look like it was your fault or something negative happened while on the visit, so be careful.

I would also try and get this unmonitored overnight visit on the record somewhere. If I know dcfs, they will probably not indicate this happened anywhere on the official court record (progress report). Like Daruma said, the visit was meant to happen.
I'm not a lawyer but will try and help you any way i can. My postings may seem harsh but they all stem from personal experience with DCFS. I am not a victim and take responsibility for my part in my life, but I will always help ANYONE learn about the corrupt sick system.

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KDus
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby KDus » Tue Aug 09, 2011 9:52 pm

Yup, it won't be anywhere in the reports.
I have a report that says my step daughters are "thriving" with their father. ...They don't live with him, they're in a group home in another county.
It was just a way for CPS to wash their hands of un-adoptable kids while keeping the young ones.
Write your own report and file it as a memo.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby noroses4u2c » Wed Aug 10, 2011 8:16 am

How do you write and file your own report?

I received a phone call a little bit ago from CPS. They are suddenly conducting a meeting tomorrow at 1pm to discuss the case. My stomach is tied in knots.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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monkette31
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby monkette31 » Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:24 pm

Well, I hope this is good news. Out here in Cal., they call this a TDM, a meeting that is supposed to occur when a decision is about to be made by them regarding your child's placement. I am thinking if they were just going to ship her to the dad's, like they've been saying all along, they would have just done so. This may be a good meeting for you. Get some good sleep tonight so that you are prepared for the meet tomorrow.
I'm not a lawyer but will try and help you any way i can. My postings may seem harsh but they all stem from personal experience with DCFS. I am not a victim and take responsibility for my part in my life, but I will always help ANYONE learn about the corrupt sick system.

angelheart83
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby angelheart83 » Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:37 pm

I hardly ever come here anymore but I'm subscribing to this thread.

I hope the meeting goes well tomorrow. Keep us posted.

I'm glad you got an overnight visit with your daughter, but sad that CPS is reacting the way they have. The agency makes no sense.
My children have never been harmed by my actions. My children both love me and trust me. Even my nonverbal son shows he trusts me by how he interacts with me. We didn't deserve what we've gone through because of CPS. We demand justice.

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KDus
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby KDus » Wed Aug 10, 2011 7:50 pm

noroses4u2c wrote:How do you write and file your own report?

I received a phone call a little bit ago from CPS. They are suddenly conducting a meeting tomorrow at 1pm to discuss the case. My stomach is tied in knots.


Depends on whether you have an attorney or not.

If not, the rules are pretty simple. Start by copying their format and put the right names on it. Make sure it has the case number and date/ time/ place of the next hearing. It will need the 2 hole legal punch at the top and you'll need at least 5 complete copies. Your report can be one sentence or 100+ pages. There are several ways to structure it. Declaration, report, affidavit, memo and more. Each one may have its own rules in your area that determine how long it must be filed before it can be considered in a hearing. Some must be signed under penalty of perjury, others not.
You take the stack to the clerk and say, 1 is for the court, the rest are for conformed copies.
Then, you must serve a copy to every party in the case. Generally, you can't serve it. Someone not closely related must do it. You may be able to have the clerk serve it for you. Then, you have to file a "proof of service".
It sounds complex until you've done it.

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LindaJM
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby LindaJM » Thu Aug 11, 2011 11:49 am

Here's a sample declaration:
http://fightcps.com/2010/12/22/how-to-w ... the-court/

I'm so glad you got a visit with your daughter, even though it was an accident on their part. I wonder why your daughter isn't being allowed to choose where she wants to live. Does she have an opportunity to speak out in court?
Sample Document Library

Please keep in mind that none of us are lawyers and we can't give legal advice. We are simply telling you what we would do in a similar situation. It is to your advantage to get a lawyer.

"Evil flourishes when good men do nothing." - Edmund Burke ... so try to do something to change the system ...

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby noroses4u2c » Thu Aug 11, 2011 4:28 pm

This is going to sound weird. I don't know what to make of it.

I went to the meeting. My daughter was there. We got to sit together.

They are now acting openly like the plan was to have overnights all along. Five workers 'quit' all on the same day. (I think they were given the option to publicly quit.) And I am supposedly going to be getting my daughter this weekend as well. At this point, I'll believe it when I see it. They are totally covering up the paperwork error, and my daughter is forbidden to even mention it. My daughter still thinks it is hilarious.

It's a shame that the workers who 'quit' weren't the primary ones I was having trouble with. Such a shame... I don't think I've ever even met the ones who 'quit'.

They are still sending her with him though. She goes out there labor day weekend. Now, they told my daughter that it was supposed to be just for a visit; however, the courts in Virginia gave him legal custody. He has a history of not bringing her back when he has had her for visits when she was a baby, and he has actually abducted her before. So, I am very worried about that. And if he keeps her, he has those court papers saying that he has legal custody. So, there wouldn't really be anything that could be done about it. His cop buddies out there wouldn't do a thing to him. They never did before. I am worried about that. And labor day weekend will be coming up quickly.

Virginia actually has jurisdiction over the custody matter because he has never lived outside the state.

It's a big mess.

I hope I actually get to see her tomorrow. I'm nervous that they'll change their minds or something.

This time I'm going to take lots of pictures. I was so stunned last weekend that stupid me didn't even think of it until she was about to be picked up. I only ended up with one picture of her. After she left, I kept thinking of things that we could've done but didn't. I was totally stupid. I hate it when I'm stupid. :(

I hope I really get to see her tomorrow. I miss my baby.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby noroses4u2c » Thu Aug 11, 2011 4:32 pm

LindaJM wrote:Here's a sample declaration:
http://fightcps.com/2010/12/22/how-to-w ... the-court/

I'm so glad you got a visit with your daughter, even though it was an accident on their part. I wonder why your daughter isn't being allowed to choose where she wants to live. Does she have an opportunity to speak out in court?


My daughter is not going to have an opportunity to speak out in court.

They had her to a psychologist and have declared her to have some kind of attachment disorder. Other than the rebellious stuff she was going through with me, she was a normal kid. I think they said it was reactive attachment disorder. I am unsure what the word was in front of the attachment disorder part, but my guess is that it was reactive. I wish I had jotted it down when I could still remember it.

And the way they described the disorder, it was so vague that anyone could be labeled with it. Everything is being labeled as a disorder these days.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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family_man
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby family_man » Thu Aug 11, 2011 7:00 pm

I don't understand this. If the father has been granted legal custody, then what role does CPS still play? The entity that has legal custody is the one that calls the shots. When legal custody is transferred from CPS back to a parent, it means the CPS case is closed.

Perhaps you mean physical custody? This simply means that the daughter lives with the father, and the father is responsible for meeting her day-to-day needs.
Disclaimer: I am not an attorney, and this is not legal advice.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby noroses4u2c » Thu Aug 11, 2011 8:06 pm

family_man wrote:I don't understand this. If the father has been granted legal custody, then what role does CPS still play? The entity that has legal custody is the one that calls the shots. When legal custody is transferred from CPS back to a parent, it means the CPS case is closed.

Perhaps you mean physical custody? This simply means that the daughter lives with the father, and the father is responsible for meeting her day-to-day needs.


I am in KY. I received legal custody originally in VA when my daughter was an infant. VA still has jurisdiction over the custody case because my ex never moved out of VA.

As soon as he heard about the thing with CPS, he went to court and got legal custody changed on the records out in VA from me to him. I was given less than 24 hours service of the papers, so I had no way to do anything about it. That happened February 9th.

The judge over the case here in KY refused to honor the court papers from VA and ordered that my daughter remain in foster care.

So, here in KY she is considered in custody of the state. Once she hits VA, he is considered to have legal custody.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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family_man
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby family_man » Fri Aug 12, 2011 7:49 am

My understanding is that if your daughter has lived in KY for the last six months, it is the KY court that has the authority to exercise its jurisdiction over her custody. Of course, the KY court may decline to exercise that jurisdiction on the the grounds that VA is a more appropritate venue, but that hasn't happened here.

If CPS wants to place your daughter with her father, they would have to go through the ICPC procedures. Her father would be granted legal custody only when KY CPS releases it. Mind you, I'm not attorney, so I could be wrong.

I understand your concerns about your ex keeping your daughter in VA and not letting her return to you. But she has visited him before and come back. Nothing has changed, so I wouldn't worry too much about that.
Disclaimer: I am not an attorney, and this is not legal advice.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby noroses4u2c » Fri Aug 12, 2011 12:11 pm

family_man wrote:My understanding is that if your daughter has lived in KY for the last six months, it is the KY court that has the authority to exercise its jurisdiction over her custody. Of course, the KY court may decline to exercise that jurisdiction on the the grounds that VA is a more appropritate venue, but that hasn't happened here.

If CPS wants to place your daughter with her father, they would have to go through the ICPC procedures. Her father would be granted legal custody only when KY CPS releases it. Mind you, I'm not attorney, so I could be wrong.

I understand your concerns about your ex keeping your daughter in VA and not letting her return to you. But she has visited him before and come back. Nothing has changed, so I wouldn't worry too much about that.



My daughter has not visited him in Virginia since she was a baby. And the last time he had her out there, his visitation rights had been terminated. He just came out here and snatched her and the cops wouldn't help me get her back. Instead, someone I met on the internet helped me get out to Virginia and snatch her back. That was back in Spring of 2000.

He has abducted her before. He'd have no qualms about doing it again. He never has any consequences for what he does.

He has a history of having to be forced to give her back. She has never visited without his causing some kind of problem.

He has said numerous times that he was going to kill her and that he'd make sure I never saw her again. He is very violent. He has never cared anything about her at all. He used to even deny that she was his after people learned that I got my divorce and moved out of state with her. Instead of admitting that his visitation rights were terminated, he told everyone that it came out that I had cheated on him and that she wasn't really his. He has no problem telling lies about others to make himself either look good or look like the innocent party.

So I do have a lot to worry about regarding his obtaining physical possession of her. And that is all she is to him, a possession. Winning her would be the ultimate payback for him for my leaving him instead of taking his abuse all those years ago.

She hasn't had a court ordered visit with him since she was a year old. He stopped getting her for a while because I insisted he pick her up in a public place instead of private place where he kept attacking me. His visitation rights were terminated back in 1999. She was two going on three years old at the time.

Yes, I do have lots of reasons to worry about it.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby family_man » Fri Aug 12, 2011 2:12 pm

I see. Sorry for my misunderstanding of the situation. It seems that CPS is showing some signs of warming up to you, erratic as they may be. You and your attorney should keep reiterating your concerns about sending your daughter back to VA for any reason. Wouldn't it be ironic if CPS turns out to be your best ally in your custody fight with your abusive ex? If CPS won't listen, your attorney should file a motion to your judge, stating why a visit to your ex would not be in your daughter's best interest. Use all the reasons you just stated to me. If your attorney won't do it, then do it yourself, using the forms on this web site. Your judge can override whatever CPS decides to do.
Disclaimer: I am not an attorney, and this is not legal advice.

noroses4u2c
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby noroses4u2c » Fri Sep 02, 2011 8:19 pm

I have my daughter right now.

He told them that it was a bad time to get her, so they dropped her off with me. It was too inconvenient for him.

I'm totally stunned and relieved at the same time.

While I am relieved, I'm also ticked that my daughter is so inconvenient for him. I am also ticked that they still think he is the better parent when I've been to every meeting, appointment, and visitation. He has canceled a few times because something else was more important. He's always been that way though.

So, I am relieved and angry at the same time.

My girl is safe for now.

They don't currently have any make-up dates for her to go to Virginia with him, so it's good that they don't. Of course, they can change that later.

I can relax a little bit now. But I feel too angry over everything to relax. And that ticks me off as well.
My child was abducted by the government. They demanded a ransom (the case plan). I paid the ransom and my child was kept anyway. It isn't much different from stranger abduction except that the government uses its power to make the abduction legal and unpunishable.

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monkette31
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby monkette31 » Sat Sep 03, 2011 6:07 am

Well, have a nice week with her though. With all you've been through, this seems to be a miracle that she is with you.
I'm not a lawyer but will try and help you any way i can. My postings may seem harsh but they all stem from personal experience with DCFS. I am not a victim and take responsibility for my part in my life, but I will always help ANYONE learn about the corrupt sick system.

treytrey1
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Re: My daughter is sitting beside me - UPDATE: Big mistake :

Postby treytrey1 » Sat Sep 03, 2011 10:43 am

I am so happy for you!. You have been through so much I do hope and pray that they give her back to you in the end.
This does sound promising. Like Monkette said ahve a great time with her, take lots of pics and make the most of it.

God Bless! :D


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