I'm still scared

Connecting with a power capable of victory even when masses of government workers and other assorted systemites are against you.

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I'm still scared

Postby donita » Mon Jul 24, 2006 4:02 pm

I wish that I could be a better soldier, but the anxiety and the terror causes the pit of my stomach to screach like an Alfred Hitchcock movie. Sometimes I don't breath until I tell myself to, and the muscles in my neck and jaws draw up and refuse to relax even when I try to make them. I have a hard time speaking in complete sentences and I often can't remember my own phone number. My chest is tight and I have a difficult time comprehending what I am looking at or hearing. Cps has taken my children, my grandchildren and my husband. I sit here in a house that used to be full of family alone now. Everything I say or do directly effects which ones get to come home, or not. I'm not willing to lose any but what a poor soldier I am.

God of creation is my strength and my hope. He has kept my family through all of the awful situations cps has put them through. Through the winter in KS with no heat that my husband endured and the dumps he has had to live in so that I would be warm. Through the humiliation and the abandonment of friends and family. Through the loss of work and income. Through the separation and lonliness. Through the terror of our missing daughter and the recovery of her rape. Through the endless cps coverups at our expense. Through the destruction of our credibility as citizens in society. Through the terror of the sound of someone knocking at my door. Through the battles of overcomeing cps brainwashing. God Himself has seen us through.

Wed the 26th should be our closing date and I am as terrified as I was the first time they took my oldest daughter in 1992. However I have learned how to pray and breath and trust and make new friends. I've learned how to take note, plan and stratagize. I have learned that cps does not have the power to break the bonds of love in a family. That Gods hand is not shortened that He cannot save, no matter where cps put my children or what they let happen to them. There is no tear that He cannot wipe away and replace with joy.

What time I am afraid I will trust in Him.

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Postby minervenus » Mon Jul 24, 2006 7:02 pm

My prayers are with you. You are strong simply because you have survived.


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Re: I'm still scared

Postby clara2002 » Thu Sep 30, 2010 12:54 pm

its never too late. there are ways around everything.

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Re: I'm still scared

Postby clara2002 » Mon Oct 18, 2010 3:31 pm

i hope everything worked out for donita. i feel for her.

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Re: I'm still scared

Postby LindaJM » Wed Oct 20, 2010 12:53 pm

It is so sad that we don't get to hear the resolution of many of these cases. I think I wasn't active on the site back in 2006 - that was when I was working outside my home, I think.
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Please keep in mind that none of us are lawyers and we can't give legal advice. We are simply telling you what we would do in a similar situation. It is to your advantage to get a lawyer.

"Evil flourishes when good men do nothing." - Edmund Burke ... so try to do something to change the system ...

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Re: I'm still scared

Postby clara2002 » Tue Jan 18, 2011 10:56 am

she could be still fighting. i dunno.

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Re: I'm still scared

Postby Daruma » Sat Feb 05, 2011 9:06 pm

Donita, if you're still out there and still reading, thank you so much for your words of faith and trust. My heart goes out to you for everything CPS has put you and your family through.
These are my personal opinions only. They are not legal, medical, or financial advice.

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Re: I'm still scared

Postby tammyc1971 » Fri Jul 18, 2014 11:19 am

CPS told my 14 yr.old son to testify against me or him and lil sister would b in foster care until thier 18. So he did. I was convicted of Child Endangerment and denied access to my kids who are 14 and 16 now. They live with my ex and my son is in HORRIBLE trouble and my ex went over the road and left my 14 yr old girl. What do I do if I'm denied access but I know their not safe? My case is highly illegal and there was no evidence against me at all. I'm tired of no one helping. What should I do?

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